Sympathy for the devil!
(If you wanna read the whole story, look for tag "pandoras box".)
Why do so many people sympathize with the devil? All of us have something evil in us - deep inside... Or maybe not so deep inside?
We all have instincts that kinda awaken in extreme situations. For example when we are frightened. Then we are stronger than we ever thought we could be and we might do things that shock us.
BUT: there are some people (and it is only a small percentage) who have problems controlling the evil part of them - they get angry fast and/or bully others. The really dangerous personality though is the one that EXACTLY knows how to controle the evil; well using it, living it. And I happened to marry a very particular specimen like that.
But again, back to my question: Why do so many people sympathize with the devil? Or... Why did I sympathy with the devil? I have been thinking about this a lot, believe me. I mean, everything has a reason. And in my opinion, my wonderful daughter was worth it all. But again, why was this fairly ugly (inside AND outside!) man able to intrigue me like that?
I know at least one part of the answer: people like me - meaning people that love to help others and maybe sympathize too much in general - like to reach out to persons that seem to need their support. And people like my exhusband - meaning evil and manipulative - love to reach out to exactly those kinda persons, in order to play with their weaknesses.
When my ex and I started to talk to each-other, he played the "victim's card". He told me that he was extremely unhappy due to his "ex" girlfriend. That she was constantly demeaning him, only into money and got pregnant only to keep him. He cried while telling me that he wanted to make it work but that she was treating him like crap the whole day long and that he could no longer live like that. I felt really sorry for him. There he was, dumb looking (and not self-confident - also HER fault, of course!), but actually extremely smart and so so kind (Haha, I was SO naiv!!). An old-school gentleman. How could she be so mean with him?!? I would make him happy again. That's what friends do for each-other, right?
So, after London (see my other blog-entry "Wolf in sheep's clothing"), we were a couple - not officially yet, since he wanted to protect me. He was one of my bosses and being with each-other wasn't really giving a good impression... That's what HE said at least.
Shit (sorry) hit the fan when his girl-friend found out - because in fact, he never had the courage or respect to really break up with her. So, one day her mother called the office and within minutes everybody knew - and that's how I got the reputation of being a slut and heartless bitch (sorry for all these words, but I can't cushion the blow, it has to be told the way it was...). How can she steal the baby girls father?! Well, I didn't. At least, I didn't intend to do so...
And don't forget: I thought that his ex-girlfriend was evil and this brought me to the conclusion that she was actually lying. On top of that her mother almost got me fired, which only underlined my harsh feelings against her.
And my ex? You would think that a rich and powerful man like him would be embarrassed by the whole situation. But he wasn't. He was bathing in self-pitty, convincing everybody, including himself, that had been the victim. Oh man, was he good...
Why do so many people sympathize with the devil? All of us have something evil in us - deep inside... Or maybe not so deep inside?
We all have instincts that kinda awaken in extreme situations. For example when we are frightened. Then we are stronger than we ever thought we could be and we might do things that shock us.
BUT: there are some people (and it is only a small percentage) who have problems controlling the evil part of them - they get angry fast and/or bully others. The really dangerous personality though is the one that EXACTLY knows how to controle the evil; well using it, living it. And I happened to marry a very particular specimen like that.
But again, back to my question: Why do so many people sympathize with the devil? Or... Why did I sympathy with the devil? I have been thinking about this a lot, believe me. I mean, everything has a reason. And in my opinion, my wonderful daughter was worth it all. But again, why was this fairly ugly (inside AND outside!) man able to intrigue me like that?
I know at least one part of the answer: people like me - meaning people that love to help others and maybe sympathize too much in general - like to reach out to persons that seem to need their support. And people like my exhusband - meaning evil and manipulative - love to reach out to exactly those kinda persons, in order to play with their weaknesses.
When my ex and I started to talk to each-other, he played the "victim's card". He told me that he was extremely unhappy due to his "ex" girlfriend. That she was constantly demeaning him, only into money and got pregnant only to keep him. He cried while telling me that he wanted to make it work but that she was treating him like crap the whole day long and that he could no longer live like that. I felt really sorry for him. There he was, dumb looking (and not self-confident - also HER fault, of course!), but actually extremely smart and so so kind (Haha, I was SO naiv!!). An old-school gentleman. How could she be so mean with him?!? I would make him happy again. That's what friends do for each-other, right?
So, after London (see my other blog-entry "Wolf in sheep's clothing"), we were a couple - not officially yet, since he wanted to protect me. He was one of my bosses and being with each-other wasn't really giving a good impression... That's what HE said at least.
Shit (sorry) hit the fan when his girl-friend found out - because in fact, he never had the courage or respect to really break up with her. So, one day her mother called the office and within minutes everybody knew - and that's how I got the reputation of being a slut and heartless bitch (sorry for all these words, but I can't cushion the blow, it has to be told the way it was...). How can she steal the baby girls father?! Well, I didn't. At least, I didn't intend to do so...
And don't forget: I thought that his ex-girlfriend was evil and this brought me to the conclusion that she was actually lying. On top of that her mother almost got me fired, which only underlined my harsh feelings against her.
And my ex? You would think that a rich and powerful man like him would be embarrassed by the whole situation. But he wasn't. He was bathing in self-pitty, convincing everybody, including himself, that had been the victim. Oh man, was he good...