Wow, I suck.
So, yeah, I suck. I haven't updated in ages.
I'm just not in a good mood, like, ever, so it wouldn't be a very pleasant update. To avoid sounding extremely emo and stupid and girly and cynical and optimistic and all this stuff, I just avoid writing altogether. It's working for me, except in my real journal (not that you're fake).
But I got hugged twice today, so that's nice. There were no sparks or anything tough. My head didn't swim, it actually didn't even feel nice. The half hug did, because it was from the side, and that was pleasant, although it was sort of just like hugging anyone, it wasn't... whatever. But I think I screwed up the first hug, because for some reason I wasn't expecting it, so I was sort of sideways, and then he went to hug me and by the time I got spun around the right way the hug was pretty much over. It was just awkward. The second hug wasn't awkward, though, so that's nice. So now I've been hugged by two male guys, my cousin (and other family members) obviously excluded.
*Sniffle* I just wanted to make a joke about the South, but I can't, because that would make me think of Arkansas.
Anyway.
Yeah. I worked with Mike today. For an hour. It's the first time I've worked with him since the first day, but of course that hour just flew by.
Someone hid my cup again. Dale found it and washed it for me again. Oh right, I didn't tell you about last time. Well, the other day I couldn't find my cup (did I even tell you I have a cup?) and someone told me to ask Dale, so I did, and it wasn't in the dishes, but he said he'd keep an eye out for it, and then he found it and washed it out for me because he's nice. I like Dale. Then they apparently hid it again over the weekend, because my cup was also missing this morning. *Sigh* I'm not sure why this is funny, but apparently someone gets a kick out of it. I refuse to make a "dale" tag, though, because I'm sick of all the male name tags on my LJ. This is my freaking LJ, so why all the male tags? My name is not Mike, Jeremy or Larry, so why do I have the tags? They all fit under the 'work' tag. Jeeze. (Well, not Larry, but still.)
Oh, I didn't get to tell you I'm not girly anymore. Yeah, I decided not to be. It was starting to get in the way of things.
I think I work with Dale Friday, but Sunday I'm on my own. Sherla is only Monday through Friday, I think, Dale is only Mon-Fri, Denise... I think I work with her Sunday, maybe....
*Sigh* Anyway.
Who cares?
I'm the only person at work who doesn't watch Family Guy. It's very sad. And it's not that I don't watch it on purpose, I just... don't. *Shrug* Maybe I should give it a try. I'd probably like it.
Mike was bossing me around today. I didn't mind it, because I'm kind of used to being bossed around, soit really doesn'tbother me somuch, but I kept teasing him about it. I wanted to tease him more, but I didn't, and afterward I was glad I didn't, because I don't really know him well enough to tease him alot, but I keep forgetting that. Mike is just one of those awesome people that you feel like you've always known. It's so easy to be comfortable around him. I mean, today is the third day I've ever seen him in my life and I hugged him and told him I loved him (in a teasing way, of course). He's just really easy to be around. And he's so much fun. I wish I worked with him more often. He works day shift tomorrow, but of course tomorrow I have to be off. Only work me from12-4 Wednesday (instead of 12-5) and let me work tomorrow, darn it. Another 12-4 or something. It would make me happy.
*Sigh* Oh well.
I told him I liked his hair. I do like his hair. He has great hair. It almost makes me sad how great his hair is. He's so freakin' perfect for me, and yet... nothing.
*sigh* I'm going to put it behind a cut again. *Tries to think of a cut title*
There.
Anyway.
Yeah, it's so sad. Other than the fact that I would never ever ever beable to date someone like him anyway, even if we both wanted to (which of course we don't, but I'm being hypothetical). It just wouldn't work. Our personalities are way too different. But it's so annoying that I can't have a crush on him. He would be a good crush. And he's playful and he hugs everyone, hugged me twice today, so I could even be girly a lot. But then also not, for pretty much exactly that reason. He's too free in his affection, it would drive me nuts if he groped Shannon or hugged Tiffany. Even though I would know he's just playing. It would make me crazy.
But the hugging is nice, especially when I do it right. I wish he would have been there when the mean drunk was there Saturday (again, I forgot to tell you, and no, I don't feel like it now.) He probably would have hugged me. Although then I would have probably done something stupid like start crying. (Not that I thought Shannon was stupid for crying, I'm just saying. I, personally, do not do the whole crying in public thing.)
I don't know.
I just don't think I'll ever fit in anywhere. I just wasn't born to fit in. Whenever I act like I'm fitting in (just talking to people I know I probably have no business talking to, talking topeople like they're my friends, whatever) I feel like I'm being fake. Like today when Mike said something bossy to Shannon and she said somethingand I smiled and said,"Yeah, Mike's being bossy today." Afterward I just had that feeling of,"why did you say that to her? You didn't need to say anything, it's not like you're her friend." I just don't feel right acting casual around them, which is why I will never fit in.
*Sigh*
My mood just isn't good. I feel like going to sleep.
*sigh*
So... bye.
I got hugged, though. That's nice. It seems like it's better to look back on than it actually was. It just makes me feel included, which is not a feeling I experience very often.
I'm just not in a good mood, like, ever, so it wouldn't be a very pleasant update. To avoid sounding extremely emo and stupid and girly and cynical and optimistic and all this stuff, I just avoid writing altogether. It's working for me, except in my real journal (not that you're fake).
But I got hugged twice today, so that's nice. There were no sparks or anything tough. My head didn't swim, it actually didn't even feel nice. The half hug did, because it was from the side, and that was pleasant, although it was sort of just like hugging anyone, it wasn't... whatever. But I think I screwed up the first hug, because for some reason I wasn't expecting it, so I was sort of sideways, and then he went to hug me and by the time I got spun around the right way the hug was pretty much over. It was just awkward. The second hug wasn't awkward, though, so that's nice. So now I've been hugged by two male guys, my cousin (and other family members) obviously excluded.
*Sniffle* I just wanted to make a joke about the South, but I can't, because that would make me think of Arkansas.
Anyway.
Yeah. I worked with Mike today. For an hour. It's the first time I've worked with him since the first day, but of course that hour just flew by.
Someone hid my cup again. Dale found it and washed it for me again. Oh right, I didn't tell you about last time. Well, the other day I couldn't find my cup (did I even tell you I have a cup?) and someone told me to ask Dale, so I did, and it wasn't in the dishes, but he said he'd keep an eye out for it, and then he found it and washed it out for me because he's nice. I like Dale. Then they apparently hid it again over the weekend, because my cup was also missing this morning. *Sigh* I'm not sure why this is funny, but apparently someone gets a kick out of it. I refuse to make a "dale" tag, though, because I'm sick of all the male name tags on my LJ. This is my freaking LJ, so why all the male tags? My name is not Mike, Jeremy or Larry, so why do I have the tags? They all fit under the 'work' tag. Jeeze. (Well, not Larry, but still.)
Oh, I didn't get to tell you I'm not girly anymore. Yeah, I decided not to be. It was starting to get in the way of things.
I think I work with Dale Friday, but Sunday I'm on my own. Sherla is only Monday through Friday, I think, Dale is only Mon-Fri, Denise... I think I work with her Sunday, maybe....
*Sigh* Anyway.
Who cares?
I'm the only person at work who doesn't watch Family Guy. It's very sad. And it's not that I don't watch it on purpose, I just... don't. *Shrug* Maybe I should give it a try. I'd probably like it.
Mike was bossing me around today. I didn't mind it, because I'm kind of used to being bossed around, soit really doesn'tbother me somuch, but I kept teasing him about it. I wanted to tease him more, but I didn't, and afterward I was glad I didn't, because I don't really know him well enough to tease him alot, but I keep forgetting that. Mike is just one of those awesome people that you feel like you've always known. It's so easy to be comfortable around him. I mean, today is the third day I've ever seen him in my life and I hugged him and told him I loved him (in a teasing way, of course). He's just really easy to be around. And he's so much fun. I wish I worked with him more often. He works day shift tomorrow, but of course tomorrow I have to be off. Only work me from12-4 Wednesday (instead of 12-5) and let me work tomorrow, darn it. Another 12-4 or something. It would make me happy.
*Sigh* Oh well.
I told him I liked his hair. I do like his hair. He has great hair. It almost makes me sad how great his hair is. He's so freakin' perfect for me, and yet... nothing.
*sigh* I'm going to put it behind a cut again. *Tries to think of a cut title*
There.
Anyway.
Yeah, it's so sad. Other than the fact that I would never ever ever beable to date someone like him anyway, even if we both wanted to (which of course we don't, but I'm being hypothetical). It just wouldn't work. Our personalities are way too different. But it's so annoying that I can't have a crush on him. He would be a good crush. And he's playful and he hugs everyone, hugged me twice today, so I could even be girly a lot. But then also not, for pretty much exactly that reason. He's too free in his affection, it would drive me nuts if he groped Shannon or hugged Tiffany. Even though I would know he's just playing. It would make me crazy.
But the hugging is nice, especially when I do it right. I wish he would have been there when the mean drunk was there Saturday (again, I forgot to tell you, and no, I don't feel like it now.) He probably would have hugged me. Although then I would have probably done something stupid like start crying. (Not that I thought Shannon was stupid for crying, I'm just saying. I, personally, do not do the whole crying in public thing.)
I don't know.
I just don't think I'll ever fit in anywhere. I just wasn't born to fit in. Whenever I act like I'm fitting in (just talking to people I know I probably have no business talking to, talking topeople like they're my friends, whatever) I feel like I'm being fake. Like today when Mike said something bossy to Shannon and she said somethingand I smiled and said,"Yeah, Mike's being bossy today." Afterward I just had that feeling of,"why did you say that to her? You didn't need to say anything, it's not like you're her friend." I just don't feel right acting casual around them, which is why I will never fit in.
*Sigh*
My mood just isn't good. I feel like going to sleep.
*sigh*
So... bye.
I got hugged, though. That's nice. It seems like it's better to look back on than it actually was. It just makes me feel included, which is not a feeling I experience very often.