Poetry-Finally Lost
Finally Lost
Well, this is how I am feeling right now. It is NOT an uplifting poem.
Created by Ashley on Saturday, November 08, 2008
Cold ice, freezing my heart, can't feel anymore
Going numb from the coldness and rejection
Being pushed away, because I care too much
Said the wrong things, couldn't help you
Fell and I am trying to pick you up
Everything out of place, swirling around
Dying inside, because it is easier not to love
But it will not last long, so I keep fighting
Shoving my emotions away, but they are winning now
Not perfect, no matter how much I want to be
In failing me, I failed you, crippled and screaming
Heard your cries, but couldn't silence them
Then how she hurt me so badly, ripped my heart up
Only knew her about a week, but got in really deep
Trusted her and thought she cared for me too
Wanted only attention, so lied to me, made me believe
Guess I shouldn't have thought anyone would like me
Hurt so badly by you, betrayed me, let me down
Forgive you and still care so much about you
Have to move on though, to the others I like
Guess I can't help anyone anymore
No matter how hard I try, people will always cry
Want to make your life easier, but am unable to
Say that it is your problem, well it is mine too
Maybe you can't believe that, but it is true
A poem so long, says much, but also nothing at all
Lost so much and still not giving up
People need me and I can't let them down, can't quit
But maybe I died a long time ago
What if I am just a zombie, some unreal thing
No purpose, just walking around, thinking somehow
Things always wrong, don't work out
So stupid for feeling this way
Not anyone's fault, but the emotions won
They took me and killed my life
Destroyed all that I knew
Made me hate me too
Just like things use to be
Can't believe I fell so hard
A friend, true, helped me through
But maybe it is too late for me
It doesn't have to be too late for you
I'll help you save you
Don't want you to leave, but don't wanna hurt you
I am mad at myself for being a let down
One day I will let you don too
Try not to, but I always end up messing up
You told me not to beat myself up
And I am not, but I give up
Can't be me anymore
Must be nothing
If I am, I will not hurt anyone anymore
But losing me, also means I lose so much more
Part of me wants to fight, the other part had enough
So much, all at once, trying to break me
Must remain in tact, but yet, I can't
Unable to win, say goodbye
Because I am not me anymore, she left
Maybe a long time ago, maybe just now
Lost she is in a cold place
Doesn't want to bother anyone, not anymore
Want to hurt yourself, then hurt everyone else
Nothing matters anymore, I should just stay on the floor
People need me no more
The darkness finally consumed me, crushed my heart
Believed I would always be fine, guess I was just wrong again
Shouldn't surprise me, that I am useless now
The failure I feared I always was, appeared now
And it is all I can see
Well, this is how I am feeling right now. It is NOT an uplifting poem.
Created by Ashley on Saturday, November 08, 2008
Cold ice, freezing my heart, can't feel anymore
Going numb from the coldness and rejection
Being pushed away, because I care too much
Said the wrong things, couldn't help you
Fell and I am trying to pick you up
Everything out of place, swirling around
Dying inside, because it is easier not to love
But it will not last long, so I keep fighting
Shoving my emotions away, but they are winning now
Not perfect, no matter how much I want to be
In failing me, I failed you, crippled and screaming
Heard your cries, but couldn't silence them
Then how she hurt me so badly, ripped my heart up
Only knew her about a week, but got in really deep
Trusted her and thought she cared for me too
Wanted only attention, so lied to me, made me believe
Guess I shouldn't have thought anyone would like me
Hurt so badly by you, betrayed me, let me down
Forgive you and still care so much about you
Have to move on though, to the others I like
Guess I can't help anyone anymore
No matter how hard I try, people will always cry
Want to make your life easier, but am unable to
Say that it is your problem, well it is mine too
Maybe you can't believe that, but it is true
A poem so long, says much, but also nothing at all
Lost so much and still not giving up
People need me and I can't let them down, can't quit
But maybe I died a long time ago
What if I am just a zombie, some unreal thing
No purpose, just walking around, thinking somehow
Things always wrong, don't work out
So stupid for feeling this way
Not anyone's fault, but the emotions won
They took me and killed my life
Destroyed all that I knew
Made me hate me too
Just like things use to be
Can't believe I fell so hard
A friend, true, helped me through
But maybe it is too late for me
It doesn't have to be too late for you
I'll help you save you
Don't want you to leave, but don't wanna hurt you
I am mad at myself for being a let down
One day I will let you don too
Try not to, but I always end up messing up
You told me not to beat myself up
And I am not, but I give up
Can't be me anymore
Must be nothing
If I am, I will not hurt anyone anymore
But losing me, also means I lose so much more
Part of me wants to fight, the other part had enough
So much, all at once, trying to break me
Must remain in tact, but yet, I can't
Unable to win, say goodbye
Because I am not me anymore, she left
Maybe a long time ago, maybe just now
Lost she is in a cold place
Doesn't want to bother anyone, not anymore
Want to hurt yourself, then hurt everyone else
Nothing matters anymore, I should just stay on the floor
People need me no more
The darkness finally consumed me, crushed my heart
Believed I would always be fine, guess I was just wrong again
Shouldn't surprise me, that I am useless now
The failure I feared I always was, appeared now
And it is all I can see