it takes heartbreak
title: it takes heartbreak
rating: pg
genre: angst, romance
pairing: yonghwa&seohyun
(she doesn't think she does, but it's this sudden beating in her chest to let her know that at one point she felt it. that she felt something.) people like to call jessica the ice princess, but honestly, they don't know half the story. her veins are glazed over with a frigid wind and her finger tips can barely brush the surface of what she's looking at. she's looking at this boy, and he's looking right back at her (but she can't see through the frosted window, because in his eyes is the noun love, and she could never express the verb.)
-
she's numb and hurt, and she decides that she doesn't want to feel.
that was the thing about being maknae, she simply learned so much.
(she remembers taeyeon coming in after late nights with mascara running down her face. she remembers sooyoung collapsed on the floor, letting the bottle of tequila slip through her fingers. she remembers what it feels like to feel that pain in the pit of her stomach, the pain of being unable to do something. anything. seohyun remembers these things, and she remembers learning that it's just better to forget them.)
-
he's holding her close, trying to fight her words that paint this picture of a lie. he's holding her close because if he lets go, he knows she won't come back - and it's his worst nightmare.
'i don't love you,' she says coldly. i can't love you. and these things are screaming in her ears, but she can't hear them over the sobs, the hurt, the pain. at this point it's over now, the jokes, the laughter, the falling in love, the being in love - the show is over and she simply tells him one thing: 'we don't have to act anymore. i don't have to act anymore,' and yonghwa's world simply looks white and black, because what he thought was color was now apparently all apart of an act.
so he lets go.
(its the one, and only moment in his life where he actually wants to hurt her. he wants to hurt her, he wants to say something so mean, so cruel, so grotesque - something that will cut her so deep like she had just done to him. say something that will make her realize the pain she brings with her sobs, when all he sees is this girl. ice, cold, innocent, beautiful - someone who he loves. someone who just won't love him back.)
'i wish i could say .. i will wait for you,' yonghwa whispers as they stand there. seohyun's crying has stopped - and she doesn't know why she was crying in the first place. maybe it was because he kissed her, he told her he loved her - and that was something she wanted. or maybe it was because he kissed her, he told her he loved her, and that was something that disgusted her to the point of tears.
'i really wish i could say it,' he tells her, brushing hair out of her face.
but they both know that there'll never be enough time in the world. there'll never be enough time for seohyun to learn what love is, there will just never be enough time for her to relearn what it is.
i really wish you could too.
'don't wish for things .. that neither of us want,' seohyun tells him.
-
she's cold and alone, and she still doesn't understand why jessica is the ice princess.
(but weeks past, months fly by - and seohyun finds herself in the middle of the night, crying herself to sleep because it only took heartbreak to teach her how to love again.)
rating: pg
genre: angst, romance
pairing: yonghwa&seohyun
(she doesn't think she does, but it's this sudden beating in her chest to let her know that at one point she felt it. that she felt something.) people like to call jessica the ice princess, but honestly, they don't know half the story. her veins are glazed over with a frigid wind and her finger tips can barely brush the surface of what she's looking at. she's looking at this boy, and he's looking right back at her (but she can't see through the frosted window, because in his eyes is the noun love, and she could never express the verb.)
-
she's numb and hurt, and she decides that she doesn't want to feel.
that was the thing about being maknae, she simply learned so much.
(she remembers taeyeon coming in after late nights with mascara running down her face. she remembers sooyoung collapsed on the floor, letting the bottle of tequila slip through her fingers. she remembers what it feels like to feel that pain in the pit of her stomach, the pain of being unable to do something. anything. seohyun remembers these things, and she remembers learning that it's just better to forget them.)
-
he's holding her close, trying to fight her words that paint this picture of a lie. he's holding her close because if he lets go, he knows she won't come back - and it's his worst nightmare.
'i don't love you,' she says coldly. i can't love you. and these things are screaming in her ears, but she can't hear them over the sobs, the hurt, the pain. at this point it's over now, the jokes, the laughter, the falling in love, the being in love - the show is over and she simply tells him one thing: 'we don't have to act anymore. i don't have to act anymore,' and yonghwa's world simply looks white and black, because what he thought was color was now apparently all apart of an act.
so he lets go.
(its the one, and only moment in his life where he actually wants to hurt her. he wants to hurt her, he wants to say something so mean, so cruel, so grotesque - something that will cut her so deep like she had just done to him. say something that will make her realize the pain she brings with her sobs, when all he sees is this girl. ice, cold, innocent, beautiful - someone who he loves. someone who just won't love him back.)
'i wish i could say .. i will wait for you,' yonghwa whispers as they stand there. seohyun's crying has stopped - and she doesn't know why she was crying in the first place. maybe it was because he kissed her, he told her he loved her - and that was something she wanted. or maybe it was because he kissed her, he told her he loved her, and that was something that disgusted her to the point of tears.
'i really wish i could say it,' he tells her, brushing hair out of her face.
but they both know that there'll never be enough time in the world. there'll never be enough time for seohyun to learn what love is, there will just never be enough time for her to relearn what it is.
i really wish you could too.
'don't wish for things .. that neither of us want,' seohyun tells him.
-
she's cold and alone, and she still doesn't understand why jessica is the ice princess.
(but weeks past, months fly by - and seohyun finds herself in the middle of the night, crying herself to sleep because it only took heartbreak to teach her how to love again.)