There's a new surge of 911 calls being made by women locked in their own cars. I would like to reply to this by sharing my brother's harrowing ordeal from just last night ( Read more... )

I had a dream last night that was a mix of Burn Notice, Crusoe and Doctor Who. Yes, it was as messed up as it sounds. I also think my ass had nipples. I'm officially scared of my mind ( Read more... )

You'll understand if you've seen that AT&T commercial

ME: "I don't get it. Why do you have to thaw the turkey before you deep-fry it?"
MOM: "You know oil and water don't mix, right?"
ME: "Where are you getting oil from?"
MOM: "...The fryer."
ME: "So where's the water come fro--Oh."
MOM: "Yeah, the frozen turkey. You're not allowed to cook."

Oh, LJ let me go all the way back to skip=460 where i needed to be. Blasted through my flist in 4 FREAKING HOURS, so now i get to slack off again. Also, i have to pee.

Quote of the Day: [Bro walks out of bathroom] "From now on our toilet will be known as Hiroshima."

I'm good. Fay skirted all around me without really touching. Spots of wind and rain. Didn't even lose power, which kinda made me frown because i had spent so much time off the comp. Hell, my satellite signal never flickered. All southern and eastern Florida got dumped on HARD. Fay was like the Worst Tourist Ever! She fricken moved along at 2-6mph ( Read more... )

My bro, when putting his HDTV on mute, notices an icon appears and refuses to go away ( Read more... )

We got yet ANOTHER new realtor for the house yesterday since our last one wasn't doing anything. When the new one came over she brought her 8yr old granddaughter and i thought "Crap, i'm on babysitting duty, aren't i ( Read more... )

Oh shit. Bug, don't be mad at me but..... Quinto was at Carnegie Mellon on the 21st. I didn't know!

I promised my mom i'd put this in here cuz it amused her for days:
Cash Cab Question: "What is the name of the Knight of the Roundtable who was also Sir Lancelot's illegitimate son?"
Mom: "Sir Bastard?"
Me: lulz!

Lost: ( I did not see that coming )

Did...did i just see a Yo-Yo Ball commercial on tv today or did i accidentally poof back in time for fifteen seconds?

Weird, weird dreams last night. ( Sendhil? Mr. Feeney? Have you seen my phone? )