(no subject)
Alright then. have you ever spent the day looking up to the heavens? me neither although i would like to. I envy those birds chirping outside, and I am smoking a cigarette inside where smoking is forbidden. No'one comments in this journal because noone gives a fuck and I appreciate that. I've been walking everywhere and I just don't understand it. But when I say that I don't understand it.. I think I lie because I'm talking about all the lies lately. There's a boy who loves me very very much and just doesn't understand why I won't go back out withe him. And I feel awfully terrible about it because I love him very much too and I'm scared to death of him leaving me here when he goes away. But I've got school and a license to obtain. And soon enough I can fly this coop.
All the gliitter is fake
and all the staring is great
and its better to take off
than it is to fade away
but day by day
the life changes
and the courses alter
but Im not ready to let go
of you broken hands.
And I can't seem to grow up
any more than I already have
and time will not wait for me.
why wont time wait for me
I'd like to catch up to the world
but in days like these,
no'one has the time to wait around
and everyones got something better to be doing
because theres nothing better
than being anywhere withe me
and the hours are passing,
and still I sit here alone,
withe not a soul to speak to,
and not a friend to speak of.
and now i wonder?
is it true that loneliness is the human condition?
because i could delve into TV land for the day,
because I havent got any profound-
generalizations to sum up life
like carrie bradshaw,
and im sick to death of life, and love.
there's way too much love here.
But i can't write like I used to
and i cant smile like I did.
I cant charm the world,
because the world has had quite enough.
I always wanted to make it big,
and now I can only wonder
where the past three years went?
and where did that star quality go off to?
and i need to hear the music.. but my ears are so muffled
Why have I always felt like Im getting behind.
When all I do is claw and crawl forward.
and I chase that illusion we call being content.
because its the most talked of myth alive.
and now i wonder... where are we all going?
and why are well all so disconected.. and now i go to his journal..
and i wonder if he's still around.. I know he's still around
I hope he's still around.. I want him to be around..,