It's absolutely no secret that although I am a tiny person, I adore food that is 10 different kinds of bad for me. Actually, I adore food of all sorts, but let's just there's a short list that would make diet affictionados and heart attack victims scream with unadulterated horror.
As some of my friends well know, I have a very strict regime of only allowing myself to consume one ever two years...and the other, I ran across it in an article...and...well let's just say, even I haven't the stomach for it, and I've eaten brains.
While I perfect a few ideas, here's some fun.
First: Proof that I am not making this up:
http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2009/05/the-big-mcfatty-melt.html?ref=se-bb3 ...yes, that IS indeed a burger with three grilled cheese sandwiches and two beef patties. McDonald's, have a heart seizure and die.
I'd eat it...Maaayyyybe if someone told me I had 12 hours to live.
But, for something I have tried, everyone ought to try a chip sandwich sometime in their lifetime. Again, I limit this to one every other year (in this case, I've been two years without one; I haven't had one since my 4th year Chaucer Course.) and I also suggest very highly not trying to go for a low-fat/trim the fat/low cal option. I'd also reccomend going to the UK.
However, since that's really not an option for many of you:
What you need:
- Two large slices of some manner of sandwich bread. White is most agreeable, and this from someone who religiously chooses whole grain, pumpernickel bread or whole wheat at the very least.
- 1 batch of homestyle "french fries" (Dice and deep fry potato slices. Or go to a chip shop. Even a hotdog cart that sells chips will do. WORST CASE, DESPERATE scenario? McCain's Homefries are a safe bet.)
- 3 tbsp salted butter, divided.
- Malt vinegar and white vinegar, to personal preference.
- salt to taste
Instructions:
1a. Prepare chips if they are not bought preprepared or frozen.
1. Butter both slices of bread, use remaining butter and melt in a skillet over medium heat. Place one slice of bread, butter side down in the skillet.
2. place chips atop the bread, salt and add vinegars to personal preferences. Add second piece of bread over top, again, butter side up.
3. Toast bread in the butter for approximately 1-2 minutes or until bottom side of bread is golden, then flip and toast other side. (In otherwords, prepare as though you were making your favorite grilled cheese sandwich.)
4. Remove from skillet, serve with brown sauce (ie: steak sauce; A1 or HP) if desired.
....aw what the hell. Something healthy too:
This recipie I LOVE. It's so simple, and it uses unusually coloured peppers. Winwin IMO. Also, it was even simple enough that *I* was left feeling unusually cheated out of an afternoon of cooking.
Black Bean Soup (with Meatballs and a Fried Egg - recipies to follow if desired.)
Ingreedients:
Soup
2 medium onions, finely diced.
1 large yellow bell pepper, finely diced
3 tbsp olive oil
4 cloves of garlic pressed or finely chopped
2 tbsp chilli powder
2 tbsp pepper
2 tbsp cilantro (optional)
1 tbsp salt
2 19 oz cans of black beans (do not drain)
2.5 cups chicken stock
1.5 cup water
1 lime, squeezed
Meatballs:
1/2 lb ground beef
1 tbsp thyme
1 tbsp sage
1 tbsp rosemary (...And Simon and Garfunkel apparently.)
1 tbsp oregano
1 tbsp basil
1 large egg
1/2 cup breadcrumbs (or as much as is required to retain meatball shape)
salt and pepper to taste.
Fried Egg:
1 egg per serving of soup
- This will not be mentioned outside of preparing to desired doneness. I prefer an egg with a runnier yolk, even to the point of being just shy of fully cooked. This is still desirable, particularly if you are an individual who enjoys egg drop soup. The yolk will break in the soup and be cooked by the heat of the broth.
Preparation:
Soup:
1. Finely dice onion and yellow pepper. Place in a large soup pot along with the olive oil, chilli powder, garlic, salt and pepper. Cook on medium-high heat, stirring occasionally until onion is tender.
2. Add the chicken stock, water and black beans. Stir, reduce heat to low and cover, stirring occasionally for approx. 15-20 min.
3. If you are planning on adding meat to the soup, the meat recipie is below. If not, skip ahead:
3a) Meatballs:
If you intend on adding meatballs to the soup, now is the time to do it.
1a. Combine ground beef, egg, breadcrumb and spices.
2a. Roll mixture into 1/2 inch meatballs and drop raw into simmering broth. Cook for 10-15 minutes.
Do not worry about the meatballs not cooking or browning them first. If the broth is simmering the meat will cook quickly and continue to cook, even after you have removed the soup from the heat.
4. Squeeze the juice from one large ripe lime into the soup after removing from the heat.
5. Add a fried egg if desired. Plain yoghurt or sour cream or cheddar cheese also go nicely with this recipe