Crust... what? Slicker? What?
I dunno, there's just something about the horrible dirty MRPs that compels me to cap screenies of them.
A few weeks back, I found this guy running on about fetus's(sic), his womb, and other stuff that one does not usually loudly proclaim in public... apparently referring to mortal races with his fetus remarks. I hope. Well, I don't -hope-, but it's surely more pleasant than something like this being anywhere near children. Anyway, guess where he was! That's right, Moon Guard's very own Cathedral Steps.
I feel like poking at this thing a bit, instead of just making like a cat and dragging in the mutilated mess and leaving on the rug as a gift. So, starting at the beginning, we've got dark green eyes. This was on a human, so there's nothing wrong there. After that is the race: Special... oh so very much. Long, warty nose with stray hairs growing on it? I guess that's passable. Kudos for going for something besides a pretty prince.
Sunken eyes? Sure... eye-jowls? Ehh... Jaundiced skin? Sure, I guess I can live with that. But here comes the descent. He has a moist, juicy texture that I'm fairly certain is unsanitary to even imagine... For the record, I'm imagining a water balloon filled and coated with bacon grease, then rolled in dryer lint and coated with another layer of bacon grease. Delicious. "Decended" stomach, which I assume is an attempt at the word "distended". Okay, so I guess he could pass as a human. Sort of. A very unhealthy one that's in DIRE need of a sandwich or- what's with the veinage? Why are they pulsating...? Oh, I get it. He's EEEEVIIIL.
About his tee- err, tooth. There's something somehow endearing about that snaggletooth, even past the crust, which I'm sure isn't supposed to be drippy. His hair now... laden with dandruff and dripping with grease? Lord knows my hair's been in a similar state after a bout of depression. Not quite dripping, but at least wet. One would think that the dandruff would congeal with that oil into a sort of paste.
Finally, getting to the nitty-gritty! Haha... I slay me. You know what they say about men with huge hands. They have large... wombs? For the record, he keeps his tucked under his robe. I don't quite have graphical records of this guy as the thought hadn't crossed my mind, but he was... somewhat lacking in his knowledge of anatomy. Or maybe he was trying to roleplay some sort of elder beast beyond mortal ken. Some sort of lonely elder beast beyond mortal ken, that is... loving anything he touches. Presumably in a sort of Hunchback of Notre Dame scenario. Or maybe Zeus, official Greek God of Thunder and unofficial Greek God of Bedroom Shenaniganry.
Anyway. He lingered around the cathedral steps for a bit, going all creepy uncle on people before either a priest or paladin came along and did what any sensible servant of the Light would have done: blasted that guy with holy fury. Once that was done, he just sort of laid there for a while, sizzling and popping until he logged out. I'm kinda kicking myself for not recording this for posterity.
Overall, I'd say he wasn't too terribad. It could just be my MG nativity speaking, but with a bit of polish and refinement, this concept could possibly work out as maybe something undead, like a DK or Forsaken. Because honestly, after a little bit of pondering on the description, it reminds me an awful lot of those mutated zombies in Northrend.
A few weeks back, I found this guy running on about fetus's(sic), his womb, and other stuff that one does not usually loudly proclaim in public... apparently referring to mortal races with his fetus remarks. I hope. Well, I don't -hope-, but it's surely more pleasant than something like this being anywhere near children. Anyway, guess where he was! That's right, Moon Guard's very own Cathedral Steps.
I feel like poking at this thing a bit, instead of just making like a cat and dragging in the mutilated mess and leaving on the rug as a gift. So, starting at the beginning, we've got dark green eyes. This was on a human, so there's nothing wrong there. After that is the race: Special... oh so very much. Long, warty nose with stray hairs growing on it? I guess that's passable. Kudos for going for something besides a pretty prince.
Sunken eyes? Sure... eye-jowls? Ehh... Jaundiced skin? Sure, I guess I can live with that. But here comes the descent. He has a moist, juicy texture that I'm fairly certain is unsanitary to even imagine... For the record, I'm imagining a water balloon filled and coated with bacon grease, then rolled in dryer lint and coated with another layer of bacon grease. Delicious. "Decended" stomach, which I assume is an attempt at the word "distended". Okay, so I guess he could pass as a human. Sort of. A very unhealthy one that's in DIRE need of a sandwich or- what's with the veinage? Why are they pulsating...? Oh, I get it. He's EEEEVIIIL.
About his tee- err, tooth. There's something somehow endearing about that snaggletooth, even past the crust, which I'm sure isn't supposed to be drippy. His hair now... laden with dandruff and dripping with grease? Lord knows my hair's been in a similar state after a bout of depression. Not quite dripping, but at least wet. One would think that the dandruff would congeal with that oil into a sort of paste.
Finally, getting to the nitty-gritty! Haha... I slay me. You know what they say about men with huge hands. They have large... wombs? For the record, he keeps his tucked under his robe. I don't quite have graphical records of this guy as the thought hadn't crossed my mind, but he was... somewhat lacking in his knowledge of anatomy. Or maybe he was trying to roleplay some sort of elder beast beyond mortal ken. Some sort of lonely elder beast beyond mortal ken, that is... loving anything he touches. Presumably in a sort of Hunchback of Notre Dame scenario. Or maybe Zeus, official Greek God of Thunder and unofficial Greek God of Bedroom Shenaniganry.
Anyway. He lingered around the cathedral steps for a bit, going all creepy uncle on people before either a priest or paladin came along and did what any sensible servant of the Light would have done: blasted that guy with holy fury. Once that was done, he just sort of laid there for a while, sizzling and popping until he logged out. I'm kinda kicking myself for not recording this for posterity.
Overall, I'd say he wasn't too terribad. It could just be my MG nativity speaking, but with a bit of polish and refinement, this concept could possibly work out as maybe something undead, like a DK or Forsaken. Because honestly, after a little bit of pondering on the description, it reminds me an awful lot of those mutated zombies in Northrend.