gah.
So. Joe tells me that I went nuclear with my response to 'gravely ill.' Fsck it.
I have not successfully reached Dad in days. Danny's been in and out which also doesn't help; like I said, I'm not fully happy but he's all I've got. Dad's been not interested in talking. He said he tried to wake dad a few times and Dad didn't wanna.
I got the storage unit leased and paid for yesterday . . . and as far as I can tell they ceased work on getting a path for the piano over the weekend and then called off the movers this morning. Lovely. Eventually tracked down the movers who will let me know if they're rescheduled. Perhaps this is a sign to do something else, but at this point I've paid for the climate controlled storage.
Seems she's had Danny send Uncle a message that the cousins will be here i dunno possibly this week and next. Note that she's said zilch to me about that. If that's the case then I have a problem, even more of a problem than I've had before, because moving visiting toward the end of the month puts it right when I'm trying to leave on the trip I'd agreed to go on with Covert, and it's already an insane stress to figure out how to be ready for that trip, and then that pushes to the 2nd full week in February.
Which is honestly a bit scary.
I'm really also unhappy about the Levaquin fiasco. There was a big delay in starting antibiotics, and that's my fault....except that it isn't my fault. Like, nobody actually told me there was anything to pick up until Friday morning, and then my attempts to double check got screwed with too. But I also could have started him on them Thursday night. . . except that I don't think it's wrong to want to doublecheck when there's a new black box warning? But she just texted back that at 8:05 this morning she canceled the movers because dad was coughing badly.
Ugh.
Everything ugh.
Yesterday was nice. Saturday I got some nice pictures I've still not done anything with.
Today's not been anywhere near so useful as it should have been.
I should see about getting another key to the storage room. that would be clever.
It's past 4. I really should figure out what I haven't been doing and do it.
This was the prior set of texts.
Her: I wonder that you feel "comfortable" leaving the country while your father is so gravely ill.
Jan 04 11:51pm
Me: You have been insisting that dad is not gravely ill. Care to fill me in on the truth, then?
Jan 04 11:55pm
Her: Sleeping.
Jan 05 4:50pm
Me: You have been insisting that dad is not gravely ill. Care to fill me in on the truth, then?
Jan 05 5:18pm
Her: Eating
Jan 05 6:17pm
Her: Having breakfast. Will call back.
Jan 06 11:18am
Her: [blank] Jan 06 11:48am
Me: your mailbox is full. If you would like me to be able to pay the moving company, I will need their phone number and information. Also the storage company needs to know when to expect the moving company.
Jan 06 11:49am
Her: There are times when we can't come to the phone. You must try to understand that.
Jan 06 11:53am
Me: Since it is very rare that dad ever calls back, I try again later, just as the greeting suggests. Moving info would be helpful, thanks.
Jan 06 11:57am
Her: Nebulizer
Jan 06 6:57pm
Her: Just served supper. Will call after.
Jan 06 9:24pm
Me: Waited call last night. Line busy now. Storage unit paid for; they are asking when to expect delivery.
1 hr
Her: Sleeping.
13 min
Her: [blank] 12 min
Her: [blank] 11 min
Her: [blank] 8 min
[I then make... it looks like per mightytext, 8 unanswered calls to her number; the vmx is full. I'm actually trying to reach her not Dad.]
Her: Taking cat to vet. Why don't you just send me another insulting text?
4 min
Me: 1) storage unit wants to know when movers. 2) mover info needed. 3) when cousins?
Her: At 8:05 am This morning I cancelled the piano move. Being rescheduled. Your father was coughing badly. He is ok now. Sleeping a lot.
3:53pm
I'd sent an email in my exasperation about no communication, and she's evidently seen it or been called about it, because
Her: If you "guess" wrong, you won't be able to stay here.
I'm very tempted to reply, Glad you saw the email. You see why not communicating with me about plans does lead to problems. I'm sure you'll let me know when your cousins plan to be there, then. (come to think of it, she might have just seen it come in on the ipad but not read it)
Although I'm sure I can find a nearby place to stay if it comes to that also might be good.
What sucks is that I DON"T want to go down this coming week, but the trip I've agreed to go on creates other scheduling problems.
The email I sent:
Subject: If you do not communicate with me I shall have to guess as to when to arrive.
to [zillion of stepmother's edresses plus her friend who now does not speak to me]
At the moment, due to my late January travel, my plan is to be around a couple days next week. It's not my favorite plan, but it's my current plan.
The only response I've gotten from you is that you are surprised I would be comfortable leaving the country with my father so gravely ill. I've been trying to reach you to understand what you mean by gravely ill, since in all the months you've had Vitas you've been telling me that he is not on hospice.
I've been trying to reach you to find out about the movers. You and Paul were in touch with the movers, not me. If you're hoping to have me pay the movers, then I need to know the name and contact information of same.
The storage unit is asking me when they're expecting the movers. It is 3:30 and so far as I know, no movers have arrived at the storage unit.
I've been trying to reach you to find out this information for them.
Ugh. I was going to try to get something useful done today. And I'm skipping flyingfeet because the timing to try to work on the apartment with somewanker wasn't going to work on tues and wasn't sure about wed.
Maybe I should see about acquiring a Monday flight.
Edit to add email back from Stepmother: Please listen carefully: vitas calls it managed care. I do not call it by any name. They do not call it " hospice". I have not been " insisting" that your father is in any particular condition. Despite your statement, which was untrue, I have AT NO TIME CHARACTERIZED HIS CONDITION AT ALL. You are down here often, and with all your medical knowledge, and the 8 or 9 medical doctors you said last visit that you can call on, you can see his condition for yourself. And you can call Vitas, since your father tells us that you had him sign a document which he SAYS HE READ for you to be given answers to your questions. I have no objection whatever to your asking questions of Vitas. I did suggest that they answer your questions in writing, email, so as to avoid various problems of understanding and transmission. They will do as they think reasonable, of course. Finally, let me assure you that you do not make things easier here when you accuse me of lying to you about him. Your father agrees with me. TO REPEAT, I HAVE NOT AT ANY TIME DESCRIBED HIS CONDITION TO YOU other than he is sleeping, eating, etc. Obviously, you will say whatever you please, true or not. This is unfortunate, but not unusual. By the way , I have never lied to you about ANYTHING. I have not lied to or about Uncle Danny, and I have never lied to your father about ANYTHING. I believe that relationships are much better if nobody lies, though I've never tried it any other way. This puts me at a disadvantage: other people lie, but I don't. Maybe I'll start./////// My cousins expect to come on Wednesday and Thursday, as things stand now, for several days. There are 4 of them. I do not want to call them off again because you will be here during the same time. Why don't you skype your father when Danny is here? Isn't that a good way to see him? People seem to think it's a great way to check up on things./////// I sent you a text about the piano.
and then also I certainly am "HOPING" you will pay the movers. I am not going to pay them. This may sound silly, but IT IS YOUR PIANO. Sent from JFG
with my reply of I have no way of paying the movers if you do not give me or them contact information so that we are connected.
This entry was originally posted at https://vvalkyri.dreamwidth.org/1680519.html. You can add to the
comments there using OpenID, or here is okay too.
I have not successfully reached Dad in days. Danny's been in and out which also doesn't help; like I said, I'm not fully happy but he's all I've got. Dad's been not interested in talking. He said he tried to wake dad a few times and Dad didn't wanna.
I got the storage unit leased and paid for yesterday . . . and as far as I can tell they ceased work on getting a path for the piano over the weekend and then called off the movers this morning. Lovely. Eventually tracked down the movers who will let me know if they're rescheduled. Perhaps this is a sign to do something else, but at this point I've paid for the climate controlled storage.
Seems she's had Danny send Uncle a message that the cousins will be here i dunno possibly this week and next. Note that she's said zilch to me about that. If that's the case then I have a problem, even more of a problem than I've had before, because moving visiting toward the end of the month puts it right when I'm trying to leave on the trip I'd agreed to go on with Covert, and it's already an insane stress to figure out how to be ready for that trip, and then that pushes to the 2nd full week in February.
Which is honestly a bit scary.
I'm really also unhappy about the Levaquin fiasco. There was a big delay in starting antibiotics, and that's my fault....except that it isn't my fault. Like, nobody actually told me there was anything to pick up until Friday morning, and then my attempts to double check got screwed with too. But I also could have started him on them Thursday night. . . except that I don't think it's wrong to want to doublecheck when there's a new black box warning? But she just texted back that at 8:05 this morning she canceled the movers because dad was coughing badly.
Ugh.
Everything ugh.
Yesterday was nice. Saturday I got some nice pictures I've still not done anything with.
Today's not been anywhere near so useful as it should have been.
I should see about getting another key to the storage room. that would be clever.
It's past 4. I really should figure out what I haven't been doing and do it.
This was the prior set of texts.
Her: I wonder that you feel "comfortable" leaving the country while your father is so gravely ill.
Jan 04 11:51pm
Me: You have been insisting that dad is not gravely ill. Care to fill me in on the truth, then?
Jan 04 11:55pm
Her: Sleeping.
Jan 05 4:50pm
Me: You have been insisting that dad is not gravely ill. Care to fill me in on the truth, then?
Jan 05 5:18pm
Her: Eating
Jan 05 6:17pm
Her: Having breakfast. Will call back.
Jan 06 11:18am
Her: [blank] Jan 06 11:48am
Me: your mailbox is full. If you would like me to be able to pay the moving company, I will need their phone number and information. Also the storage company needs to know when to expect the moving company.
Jan 06 11:49am
Her: There are times when we can't come to the phone. You must try to understand that.
Jan 06 11:53am
Me: Since it is very rare that dad ever calls back, I try again later, just as the greeting suggests. Moving info would be helpful, thanks.
Jan 06 11:57am
Her: Nebulizer
Jan 06 6:57pm
Her: Just served supper. Will call after.
Jan 06 9:24pm
Me: Waited call last night. Line busy now. Storage unit paid for; they are asking when to expect delivery.
1 hr
Her: Sleeping.
13 min
Her: [blank] 12 min
Her: [blank] 11 min
Her: [blank] 8 min
[I then make... it looks like per mightytext, 8 unanswered calls to her number; the vmx is full. I'm actually trying to reach her not Dad.]
Her: Taking cat to vet. Why don't you just send me another insulting text?
4 min
Me: 1) storage unit wants to know when movers. 2) mover info needed. 3) when cousins?
Her: At 8:05 am This morning I cancelled the piano move. Being rescheduled. Your father was coughing badly. He is ok now. Sleeping a lot.
3:53pm
I'd sent an email in my exasperation about no communication, and she's evidently seen it or been called about it, because
Her: If you "guess" wrong, you won't be able to stay here.
I'm very tempted to reply, Glad you saw the email. You see why not communicating with me about plans does lead to problems. I'm sure you'll let me know when your cousins plan to be there, then. (come to think of it, she might have just seen it come in on the ipad but not read it)
Although I'm sure I can find a nearby place to stay if it comes to that also might be good.
What sucks is that I DON"T want to go down this coming week, but the trip I've agreed to go on creates other scheduling problems.
The email I sent:
Subject: If you do not communicate with me I shall have to guess as to when to arrive.
to [zillion of stepmother's edresses plus her friend who now does not speak to me]
At the moment, due to my late January travel, my plan is to be around a couple days next week. It's not my favorite plan, but it's my current plan.
The only response I've gotten from you is that you are surprised I would be comfortable leaving the country with my father so gravely ill. I've been trying to reach you to understand what you mean by gravely ill, since in all the months you've had Vitas you've been telling me that he is not on hospice.
I've been trying to reach you to find out about the movers. You and Paul were in touch with the movers, not me. If you're hoping to have me pay the movers, then I need to know the name and contact information of same.
The storage unit is asking me when they're expecting the movers. It is 3:30 and so far as I know, no movers have arrived at the storage unit.
I've been trying to reach you to find out this information for them.
Ugh. I was going to try to get something useful done today. And I'm skipping flyingfeet because the timing to try to work on the apartment with somewanker wasn't going to work on tues and wasn't sure about wed.
Maybe I should see about acquiring a Monday flight.
Edit to add email back from Stepmother: Please listen carefully: vitas calls it managed care. I do not call it by any name. They do not call it " hospice". I have not been " insisting" that your father is in any particular condition. Despite your statement, which was untrue, I have AT NO TIME CHARACTERIZED HIS CONDITION AT ALL. You are down here often, and with all your medical knowledge, and the 8 or 9 medical doctors you said last visit that you can call on, you can see his condition for yourself. And you can call Vitas, since your father tells us that you had him sign a document which he SAYS HE READ for you to be given answers to your questions. I have no objection whatever to your asking questions of Vitas. I did suggest that they answer your questions in writing, email, so as to avoid various problems of understanding and transmission. They will do as they think reasonable, of course. Finally, let me assure you that you do not make things easier here when you accuse me of lying to you about him. Your father agrees with me. TO REPEAT, I HAVE NOT AT ANY TIME DESCRIBED HIS CONDITION TO YOU other than he is sleeping, eating, etc. Obviously, you will say whatever you please, true or not. This is unfortunate, but not unusual. By the way , I have never lied to you about ANYTHING. I have not lied to or about Uncle Danny, and I have never lied to your father about ANYTHING. I believe that relationships are much better if nobody lies, though I've never tried it any other way. This puts me at a disadvantage: other people lie, but I don't. Maybe I'll start./////// My cousins expect to come on Wednesday and Thursday, as things stand now, for several days. There are 4 of them. I do not want to call them off again because you will be here during the same time. Why don't you skype your father when Danny is here? Isn't that a good way to see him? People seem to think it's a great way to check up on things./////// I sent you a text about the piano.
and then also I certainly am "HOPING" you will pay the movers. I am not going to pay them. This may sound silly, but IT IS YOUR PIANO. Sent from JFG
with my reply of I have no way of paying the movers if you do not give me or them contact information so that we are connected.
This entry was originally posted at https://vvalkyri.dreamwidth.org/1680519.html. You can add to the
comments there using OpenID, or here is okay too.