Nervous
Okay, so I have to admit, I'm a little nervous about going to work the next week and a half. DoriAnn is going to be out of town as I've told you all, and while I know my job and everyone elses job better than anyone else I'm still nervous about it. I've taken over things before and it was no big deal, I've ran the show in Portsmouth and I did great, but DoriAnn was always a phone call or a car ride way when I was...she's not going to be this week. She's going to be in Florida--with Charlie. This means if something does go wrong it's all me, I don't even have Charlie to call. Hopefully nothing will happen and DoriAnn will come back and be EXTREMLY proud of me. I told her that I'm a little worried about her leaving and something happening and she told me if she didn't trust me and think I could handle it there would be NO WAY IN HELL she'd leave me in charge of it. Though that means a lot and gives me an extra confidence boost it still leave me the slightest bit nervous. I'm sure I'll do fine. Of course it doesn't help that this is a hechtic week anyway with the surgery and trying to take care of the kids the whole week, but on top of that I'm running the show in P-town and working about 60 hours in 5 days. I'm going to pull my hair out by the end of this week. Oh, on top of ALL this, I have recieved a subpeona for court, yeah how fucking wonderful is that. I just went to court and not I have to fucking go AGAIN. My like couldn't get any better. HA! Oh, and I haven't talked to Jeff but once since Saturday because he has the flu really really bad and isn't working or anything...poor baby. I wish I could just sit by his side all day and take care of him. I'll keep you updated on that's happening in that situation. Anyway, you know, all I want is for things with Jeff to work out in my favor. Whether anyone thinsk they will, I just want your support. I don't want I told you so's or anything like that, just be there for me through this with him please. It's hard enough as it is, but it would be a little easier if my friends were on my side. I know it's a twisted relationship, trust me, I do realize that, but I do love him and I can't change that. I can't stop loving him because I'm in way to deep. I wanna be with him the rest of my life. I want him to be the one I sleep beside and laugh beside, the one who holds me when I'm upset or cold or when I'm happy or when I just need him to hold me. Anyway, I gotta go for now, have some things I need to get done.
Oh how I love that man....the way he holds me, the way he touches me, the way he runs his lips down my neck...the way he makes me feel is surreal...he makes me feel like we're in heaven.
Oh how I love that man....the way he holds me, the way he touches me, the way he runs his lips down my neck...the way he makes me feel is surreal...he makes me feel like we're in heaven.