Love, the greatest torture device ever.
A late night at huddle house, I hope that this doesn't become habit again. I did this 2 years ago when I lived in Carrollton cause I was alone, deathly alone at those times. I do not feel the same as I did in those times. I do not sit at the railroad tracks waiting for the next train to roll along. I do not stand with my nose just inches from the passing train fighting the urge to lean forward. I am rational, I hope, in these days, I do not know what it is I desire to come of them, but I am sure something will come up, whether it be a solution or another element of misery. I want to go to the hospital sometimes, just to get away and clear my head, but there has to be a better solution than institutionalization. I know that I am just using that as a crutch and something to fall back on, but I just do not know how to get away when I am still here.