Whoa
Crazy how it's been almost 10 years since I've been on here. Reading through this journal made more aware of how much of my memory I had lost. It's crazy to read over the stuff on here again. All the things that have happened. It honestly feels pretty amazing. Ya know that feeling when you finally find the thing you've been looking all around the house for? Well, there ya go. XD
So I left my service in the Army about 8 years ago now. What a crazy times it's been. So much has happened it feels like 8 years just isn't enough time. Well, I doubt anyone reads this so, is there a point in updating about past events? Hmmmmm. Well, Cortnye and I did finalize the divorce after I came home. Ended up back together anyways. That didn't work out. I know, huge surprise right? We tried so many times and failed that it's sort of ridiculous. It is what it is. Reading back through this made me realize that it was never going to work anyways. We had so many problems that I'm surprised we lasted even half as long as we did. This last time was the longest running chance we gave our relationship. Almost 4 years. It was an interesting experience to say the least. But that's been almost 2 years dead now. I'm tellin' ya. It's been crazy.
I did however end up disabled from my time in the military. Arthritis everywhere, torn ligaments and busted shoulders. My neck is the main issue. I somehow managed to damage the cervical spinal column. It's caused cascade nerve damage. Ton of fun there. Still a good time being me, as you can see. ':)
There's very particular things I want to touch on. I always end up turning to my journal in times where I need an outlet but, don't know where to release it. Things I just need to write my through I guess. Sometimes just putting the thoughts down helps tremendously. I know I have people to talk to. I know I should definitely talk with one particular person whenever anything comes up. Sometimes I just need to talk to myself. <.< That is some kind of sign of insanity. There's times I don't like the my own answers to my own questions.
Oh well. More to come. Just wanted to throw a very watered down entry on here while I work on another one. I just don't know if I should give her access to this journal or not. Sometimes my thoughts aren't great. But an overwhelming majority of the time it doesn't reflect my feelings. There's this swirling vortex of bullshit that goes on inside my head at all hours of the day. And no matter what I do I can't control what comes out of it. Making things difficult these days. But off I go.