(no subject)
it's beginning to be very odd to constantly exist. everyday i wake up and i think, and i have this entire complex world that no one else is aware of. it sounds simple enough and self evident, but when you think about it too hard it's really quite alienating. i freak myself out on a daily basis now. i'll be walking down the sidewalk and be fine, then i look around the wrong way and i start thinking about what i'm seeing and really how i'm seeing it... and i'm thinking about seeing the trees and other people and how they are thinking about the same trees and how they're in this whole other reality that i can never have any concept of. and i'll look at my hand, this hand that i've seen everyday of my life... my life that's so continuous; things will always keep happening. nothing ever stops and we're still thinking. it's exhausting. so many thoughts and feelings every moment of our everlasting lives. and they are everlastings. certainly we will die, but as of now time stretches so far. as far as i can remember i've existed. i guess i was born, and i will die. but are those real beginnings and ends? so far apart and distant from now and neither of which we have a solid concept of.
how strange it is to be anything at all.
how strange it is to be anything at all.