hmmm

[typikalblonde]

yesturday sucked, then got better, last night it got worse, and then it got better.. and through all of this shit, i can defenitely say I have fallen too fucking hard for this kid. i read his journal.. made me realize a bunch of things... not bad things, well some, but mostly good. i feel soo bad for doing it. but i mean, come on he reads this

Comments

take a second to think about what you're saying, feelings, thinking and doing.

[chantepleure]

First things first, this is your journal, you can write whatever you want in it, anytime you want to write it. You should not stop writing in it becuase you are afraid that he is going to read it (why else would you have a public journal if not for people to read?). That is wrong on many levels. One being, hiding your feelings. It's kinda like lying. Why wouldn't you want him to know how you feel? All that would happen is... he would know how you feel, and probably understand your actions/thoughts/feelings/mind better. That can't be bad. If you hide it, it's hidden and burried and it will eat at your soul. It's only human to want to express your feelings. The more you express, the more you learn, wether they be good leasons or bad ones, and the more he can understand you. I he does not like what he reads...why would you hide it from him; only to lead him to believe everything is ok, or that everything is not ok? There is not point in not letting the person you love not know how you feel. If you keep sensoring yourself you will just

[typikalgeek]

This has nothing to do with this post but i must confide to you. My head has really been fucked up lately. There are few things that as my best friend you should know. Don't freak out about them i will be ok

[typikalblonde]

Derrek i know this.. and I love you too!.. Dont let this stupid shit get you down this bad... Life sucks, straight up! My life still sucks even though im down here.. im just lucky to have my life suck in such a great atmospher. Granted it does make my life feel better, but its not a cure. You need to face the facts of your personal life and deal with them. You need to make personal notes to yourself and change what it is you dislike about yourself!!... Derrek after the past couple of months I have realized that I need to change for the better.. i feel like i've been stuck in this body that belongs to a little girl, a girl who is still stuck on the past. A girl that is confused, depressed and doesnt really know what her next move is... and thats why I've been soo fucking depressed lately, but then i realized, Im in college, i need to start worrying about my future and that is it. as so do u... you have a job already, thats the one thing you need to be focusing on. You also need to go party more, you know thats a cure for everything