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Pretty new flowers and dolly bench, explained below ^^
Quite a weekend once again, lots of emotions getting jerked around!
So Saturday I turned 33. Rang it in with a midnight viewing of Pixar's Inside Out. Now I hadn't really known what to expect - I was like 'why the fuzzy characters, are they just jumping right to plush merchandise?' and the commercials didn't really say much and I was a bit put off at how they mentioned the voice actors up front this time - usually only crap animated films do that ^^;; (though I did actually like these voice actors as character actors, you could tell they didn't just cast them because of what they look like, which makes no sense anyway). So I came in afraid I wouldn't like it that much. But it was SO. GOOD. I understand it was made to appeal to the youngins, but I could easily apply the principles and metaphors to my own life, and as a result I was filled with feels ;_; oh, the myriad islands I've lost and the times where it felt like I could only react to the outside with limited emotions. Ach.
It was set in San Francisco, and for ONCE it didn't make it out to be a sunny tech-hippie dreamland (although it still did the thing movies always do - they had no reason to go over the Golden Gate Bridge coming from their direction, and then no reason to drive downhill on Lombard, and if they weren't already rich there was like no way they could afford that standalone victorian even if it was tiny and rickety (unless it was a company gift I guess - and honestly it'd be stupid of them not to get a nicer place in a nearby suburb), AND where they ended up didn't seem to be near James Lick Middle (the school the main girl evidently ends up at)). R knows the pizza place they appear to be making fun of :P They end up having trouble with this city, which is pretty poignant considering my situation, and Lewis Black is super cute about it :P
Aside from that, it was just awesome ;_; What I thought was fuzzy skin on the emotions was actually animated bubbly particle texture, a ton of work on their part, and likewise the story that seemed super simple was fleshed out really well with all this exploring of different regions and nuances of the psyche - childlike, yes, but the scope for detail was amazingly well presented and just calling out for the audience's own imagination. The animation and rendering were more gorgeous than I would have ever guessed from the ads. The voices were all great, natural for the situation/character, utilized well for the most part. And I did come close to teariness at that one moment. Don't wanna spoil it, but yes! It was good!
So that was cool, and I also had been fixated on horseriding again, but didn't want to spend too much money (this one stable, down south I think, has an AMAZING sounding 6-hour ride through forest, past ocean and up to a waterfall, but it's super pricey - that'll wait till we know where we're going to live and how much it'll cost), so I asked to do the early morning beach ride at Mar Vista stables (in the city). It was cheap, but honestly kind of ghetto (decrepit stable, very grizzled proprietor, very little instruction, no changes in pace). BUT still really fun, with really pretty views - BUT super freezing and my hair got salt-blasted - BUT they had an awesome dog herding us all through the ride, romping in the ocean andd stuff all free, and a super cute friendly-grump outdoor cat that looked like Hoochen except fat :) - BUT my horse had a piece of skin flapping off his face :( - BUT he (named Spaghetti :3), the trail leaders and the other riders were all friendly, the trail was nice and all in all I really enjoyed it. 7/10 would ride again. Between that, the late movie and my insomnia I got absolutely no sleep, though. -_-
Then we did the weekend errands and R tried to take me to a new candy shop but it appeared to be hidden away somewhere in the depths of SF State campus and I guess it was closed. Through that, and then a long talk at home cleaning up from the trail, we had a sober discussion about our future, the living thing, and us (no we're not breaking up, but it was important to get all our thoughts out and I'm usually pretty down on my birthday so it was like a 'might as well do a bit of serious stufff' kind of talk). There are all these ticking clocks around my brain these days :/ but for another time. All dressed, we went to discover a couple more new candy shops :3 (Papabubble near Hayes has really yummy boba/cube tea, and these tiny cute fruit candies that seem like they won't be much but pack some really nice concentrated, fragrant, varied fruit flavor! and since we were by my favorite jewelry store we went in and R got me a pretty bracelet ;_; on top of all the day's outings AND the most thoughtful and practical thing on my list, a new macro lens for my DSLR! With it I hope to coax out better dolly pics even with the terrible light around here, and I hope it'll inspire me to really learn all I'm missing about my photography skills instead of always being too tired/busy! He was absolutely amazing).
Then we met up with his family for dinner at Red Hill Station, with new experiences there as well! I always thought I didn't like olives, but turns out maybe I just don't like brined ones - the big fresh garlic-cured ones they brought out with the bread (famous Tartine bread, which I don't think I've ever tried since there's always a hipstery line there - it was quite good! Maybe not the best I've ever tasted but very definitive of good bread.) were pretty yummy! Softly tart and nicely savory. Finally got an inkling of what the Greeks were always on about :) R and I shared the carbonara (I've never had the classic dish so I was curious - I thought the hit of chili was distracting, but it was otherwise delicious, cohesive and the bacon was awesome) and the baked true cod (good, though a bit watery broth, I wish it had been grilled with the corn and all that instead, could've used some nice sear) and I got to taste some of the other stuff - all good but the mussels with chorizo tasted almost spot on like the morning's horses smelled ^^;; I was very curious about the mushroom creme brulee but the family had gotten me cake (strawberry ice cream, Mitchell's) which we had back at their house, SO SWEET - and they got me some super pretty flowers (above, chewed a bit by their kitty but I still felt the love), more candy :3, an antique wooden doll bench that R's mom and sister oiled and cushioned themselves, and some VERY much appreciated bday monies. I was kind of overwhelmed, I hadn't been expecting anything like that...sometimes I do have a bit of doubt about how they see me, but not then <3 We all had a nice talk too.
Then R and I headed out to this summer solstice party - Love and Light 2015 - so I could dance some :) And here...well, I actually had a lot of fun, but the party itself failed miserably ^^;; they had it at the Factory, which is rather known as more of a douchey establishment, different kind of parties, not marketed toward the more ravey arty crowd, and I think this was a factor. The venue was quite large, and though they decorated it nicely and kept the music going, scattered free bindhis, even hired artists to set up and paint on canvases around the venue and bellydancers (not great ones, but nonetheless), the small crowd that was there in the beginning dwindled instead of growing. We saw they'd sold 2 tiers of presales, but...well, by the time we left (probably around 2 or 3?) the ONLY unhired people left were countable on my digits, and gathered in one little group in one of the chill rooms with one of the smaller DJ groups (Sugar Beats, who were pretty good, quite danceable and put lots of energy into it! And the guy before them played drifting, echoey guitar along with his beats - he was actually awesome, I thought.). It felt like we were observing a school age jam session by then :P but my mood was high going in and it was cool to have a lot of room to dance :P I liked it, I just feel bad that they probably lost a ton of money and probably won't do it again (in SF anyway). Another parallel to our own woes, perhaps? Is it that all the PLUR-y people have already left because of the housing costs? Or was there just some kind of marketing disaster? I don't know. The Wicked party earlier in the month was packed to the gills, but it was smaller and had a big fanbase, and I'm pretty sure they cancelled the larger Anthem due to lack of sales. I'm not ready for the love-party age to be over, but this area might be ^^;;
Anyway. Next day (still got no sleep because I was wired) was both Father's Day and the day of the wake of the aforementioned family friend (last entry). It was terrible. His kids, up in the front crying, this horrible family drama that went down...the anger on top of the sadness...I couldn't stop crying myself, I was ravaged by empathy. The...restoration...wasn't the best it could possibly be...I really, really hope the kids are able to talk to someone professional. They will really need it, as well R's friend I think (I like him, but it's hard for us to talk much personally because he doesn't speak English and my Spanish is not fluent. Did my best though). I don't want to air other people's laundry so I won't go into detail but the whole affair was fury inducing and caused a lot of wounds all around. So we (me and R's family) took R's dad to Father's day brunch afterwards on a quite somber note (at Bernal Star, formerly Liberty - their chile relleno is very good, clean flavors, not too much batter, didn't skimp on buttery avocado). I hope we were able to articulate his importance to us regardless of the sadness around. We got him a heavy duty work radio he'd been after.
Woah this is long. Okay, Monday night my mom and her boyfriend took us to bday dinner (Osha Thai, all delicious, I had my usual seabass clay pot and sticky rice with coconut ice cream) and they also gave me some wonderfully thoughtful gift monies (and I also got a super sweet etsy gift from my darling friend in AZ). This weekend I think we'll be seeing some friends for possibly a little more bday hijinks. I'm super grateful for all everyone's done and given. It passed pretty quickly this year, there was a lot of other stuff to think about but I still managed to get myself down. Some wonderful other people did their best to pull me back up. <3
I just need to remember how to sleep!