same old story
Why do i so often post right before i am about to leave for the weekend? IT'S A MYSTERY!
WHAT THE FUCKING HELL WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE OFF THE ENDING
WHAT
WHY
WHAT
I am so confused and frustrated and bewildered and WHAT WHY. I can live with completely switching the story around and events happening differently and even stupid boring "EEEVIL CONSPIRACY!!!" Magisterium scenes, BUT WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE OFF THE ENDING?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!??!? ONE) It brings the story together completely. TWO) It provides much needed resolution to the events that transpired. THREE) It ends at exactly the perfect place and opens the door (HA HA LITERALLY) to the next book. FOUR) IT IS AWESOME WHAT THE FUCK.
I. just. WHAT?! And it's like the most satisfyingly awesome ending ever in addition to being crazy and traumatic and LORD ASRIEL AND MRS. COULTER MAKING OUT and the goddamn aurora and and and and and I REALLY WANTED TO SEE IT. I just sat there when it faded to black. I sat and stared. The music swelled and it was black and i was like "ha ha, they sure are making it seem like there are going to be credits here, but i know there's some big important stuff that still has to happen!" AND THEN THE CREDITS STARTED.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
And it's especially super confusing because in the trailers there's that shot of Asriel looking at the lights? Right after he opens the doorway? And also i've seen a picture somewhere of the making out, i remember a long time ago people going crazy about that! SO I WAS MISLED IN ADDITION TO BEING DISAPPOINTED.
But anyway. The rest was alright i guess. Sam Elliott was the best part! I was a little disappointed by that casting originally just because he is not how i imagine Lee Scoresby, but LEE SCORESBY!! And HESTER! I love Lee Scoresby and Hester! Also, IOREK BYRNISON. Yessssss. Things really picked up when both Lee and Iorek showed up within the span of about five minutes. Bolvangar was pretty cool, i like that they included the tropical picture on the wall of the cafeteria. When the movie started i was just so happy to be SEEING it, and there were a few moments that captured things really well for me, like when Mrs. Coulter found Lyra about to get the intercision, and when Iorek renamed Lyra Silvertongue and called her his daemon (YESSSS), and basically everything with bears and daemons. I wish they had shown the northern lights, oh, EVER, Lyra is always looking at the city in the sky when they are in the North! I thought they would show that so much and they NEVER DID! IT WOULD HAVE LOOKED SO COOL. SOMETHING ELSE THAT WOULD HAVE LOOKED COOL: THE ENDING. I just don't understand how they're going to DO things with it all changed around the way it is! Like so is the balloon going to crash and then Lyra gets separated from them and then she finds Asriel and then he steals Roger?? Or... WHAT. It's jiggered around with beyond all sense!
THE BOOK ENDS AT EXACTLY THE RIGHT PLACE. IT IS ILLOGICAL TO LEAVE OFF THE ENDING.
I don't even have tiiiiiiime to get into the misrepresentation of thematic elements. Like, i never ever got the impression that the Magisterium was expressly trying to stamp out free will the way they stated it in the movie. They were trying to solve the problem of the corruption and impurity of adults, they were trying to stamp out SIN, not free will. Which of course is the whole idea of it, that "sin" and free will are interconnected in such a way that it depends on who is interpreting it to decide what's what, and that in "purifying" people and supposedly making them better in a way that is obviously horrible and wrong they are actually removing everything about them that makes them human in the first place. AND SO ON AND SO FORTH i can't go into huge amounts of depth because i'm not even finished with all the books and plus i am bad at discussing such complex minutiae! Everything makes a big knot of ideas in my head that i can't untangle but it makes sense to me and it is all awesome and amazing and i LOVE IT. And it was misrepresented. I get kind of bored when things get re-explained like ten times to make sure movie audiences understand and it's hard to tell if it will make sense or not and they keep calling the alethiometer The Golden Compass like that is also it's official name and here's a BIG PIECE OF PAPER that says GENERAL OBLATION BOARD because see, the letters G-O-B mean Gobblers! But that's just being picky because i've read the book like an elitist asshole and nobody ever gets shit right. :/
I just don't understand how religious types are all up in arms stirring up controversy about this movie when it leaves out ALL the important religious stuff. Asriel's explanation of Dust as original sin is one of my absolute favorite parts of the book, so man that got like DOUBLE nixed and it makes me sad, because not only did they leave out the religion, they left out the ending! HA HA BURN, MARINA. SO BURNED.
Daniel Craig as Lord Asriel will probably never not kick my ass as the awesomest casting in all of forever, so i really wish he'd been in it for more than five seconds! Which he isn't actually in the book that much but THE ENDING IS PRETTY IMPORTANT, DID YOU KNOW??
Why would they leave the kid out of the photogram in the beginning? How hard would that have been to show that kids don't attract Dust? Some things confound me so!
Lyra was alright! I love her A LOT in the books and she was appropriately cute and rough-and-tumble and brave and take charge, but somehow... not... quite enough? I don't know. Movies just make it so much harder to connect with characters. LYRA AND PAN!!!! Really the silver guillotine scene was probably one of the most well-done, that part makes me saaaaaaaaaaad.
Oh man i can't believe they really showed Iorek ripping off Iofur's jaw. Everybody went like "AAAAAH WHAT?!" it was GREAT. That was my reaction when i read it! I didn't know if they'd actually show it because it is so surprisingly violent! I'm glad they did. :D
I could talk about niggling changed details a LOT, because they changed a LOT, as is the way things usually go. BUT I JUST HAD TO POST TO SAY HOW FREAKING DUMBFOUNDED I AM THAT THEY COMPLETELY LEFT OFF THE ENTIRE ENDING AND THAT WAS REALLY REALLY DUMB. DUMB. DUMBFOUNDINGLY DUMB. The movie just stopped! It even seemed like "that's it?" to my brother who hasn't read it, and like the book has a kind of abrupt ending just because big important shit happens right there at the very end, but it's not THAT abrupt! It's absolutely satisfying and awesome while leaving you craving so much more! I. CAN'T. UNDERSTAND. WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
I am going to be yelling about this all freaking weekend. I wish i could yell about it with you guys! I will reply to comments when i return, okay! SOMEONE HOLD ME. I need to go to my happy place where the book is perfect and makes me ridiculously happy about everything.
...I wrote a lot more than i'd planned to just now. O_o
SIGH.
WHAT THE FUCKING HELL WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE OFF THE ENDING
WHAT
WHY
WHAT
I am so confused and frustrated and bewildered and WHAT WHY. I can live with completely switching the story around and events happening differently and even stupid boring "EEEVIL CONSPIRACY!!!" Magisterium scenes, BUT WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE OFF THE ENDING?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!??!? ONE) It brings the story together completely. TWO) It provides much needed resolution to the events that transpired. THREE) It ends at exactly the perfect place and opens the door (HA HA LITERALLY) to the next book. FOUR) IT IS AWESOME WHAT THE FUCK.
I. just. WHAT?! And it's like the most satisfyingly awesome ending ever in addition to being crazy and traumatic and LORD ASRIEL AND MRS. COULTER MAKING OUT and the goddamn aurora and and and and and I REALLY WANTED TO SEE IT. I just sat there when it faded to black. I sat and stared. The music swelled and it was black and i was like "ha ha, they sure are making it seem like there are going to be credits here, but i know there's some big important stuff that still has to happen!" AND THEN THE CREDITS STARTED.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
And it's especially super confusing because in the trailers there's that shot of Asriel looking at the lights? Right after he opens the doorway? And also i've seen a picture somewhere of the making out, i remember a long time ago people going crazy about that! SO I WAS MISLED IN ADDITION TO BEING DISAPPOINTED.
But anyway. The rest was alright i guess. Sam Elliott was the best part! I was a little disappointed by that casting originally just because he is not how i imagine Lee Scoresby, but LEE SCORESBY!! And HESTER! I love Lee Scoresby and Hester! Also, IOREK BYRNISON. Yessssss. Things really picked up when both Lee and Iorek showed up within the span of about five minutes. Bolvangar was pretty cool, i like that they included the tropical picture on the wall of the cafeteria. When the movie started i was just so happy to be SEEING it, and there were a few moments that captured things really well for me, like when Mrs. Coulter found Lyra about to get the intercision, and when Iorek renamed Lyra Silvertongue and called her his daemon (YESSSS), and basically everything with bears and daemons. I wish they had shown the northern lights, oh, EVER, Lyra is always looking at the city in the sky when they are in the North! I thought they would show that so much and they NEVER DID! IT WOULD HAVE LOOKED SO COOL. SOMETHING ELSE THAT WOULD HAVE LOOKED COOL: THE ENDING. I just don't understand how they're going to DO things with it all changed around the way it is! Like so is the balloon going to crash and then Lyra gets separated from them and then she finds Asriel and then he steals Roger?? Or... WHAT. It's jiggered around with beyond all sense!
THE BOOK ENDS AT EXACTLY THE RIGHT PLACE. IT IS ILLOGICAL TO LEAVE OFF THE ENDING.
I don't even have tiiiiiiime to get into the misrepresentation of thematic elements. Like, i never ever got the impression that the Magisterium was expressly trying to stamp out free will the way they stated it in the movie. They were trying to solve the problem of the corruption and impurity of adults, they were trying to stamp out SIN, not free will. Which of course is the whole idea of it, that "sin" and free will are interconnected in such a way that it depends on who is interpreting it to decide what's what, and that in "purifying" people and supposedly making them better in a way that is obviously horrible and wrong they are actually removing everything about them that makes them human in the first place. AND SO ON AND SO FORTH i can't go into huge amounts of depth because i'm not even finished with all the books and plus i am bad at discussing such complex minutiae! Everything makes a big knot of ideas in my head that i can't untangle but it makes sense to me and it is all awesome and amazing and i LOVE IT. And it was misrepresented. I get kind of bored when things get re-explained like ten times to make sure movie audiences understand and it's hard to tell if it will make sense or not and they keep calling the alethiometer The Golden Compass like that is also it's official name and here's a BIG PIECE OF PAPER that says GENERAL OBLATION BOARD because see, the letters G-O-B mean Gobblers! But that's just being picky because i've read the book like an elitist asshole and nobody ever gets shit right. :/
I just don't understand how religious types are all up in arms stirring up controversy about this movie when it leaves out ALL the important religious stuff. Asriel's explanation of Dust as original sin is one of my absolute favorite parts of the book, so man that got like DOUBLE nixed and it makes me sad, because not only did they leave out the religion, they left out the ending! HA HA BURN, MARINA. SO BURNED.
Daniel Craig as Lord Asriel will probably never not kick my ass as the awesomest casting in all of forever, so i really wish he'd been in it for more than five seconds! Which he isn't actually in the book that much but THE ENDING IS PRETTY IMPORTANT, DID YOU KNOW??
Why would they leave the kid out of the photogram in the beginning? How hard would that have been to show that kids don't attract Dust? Some things confound me so!
Lyra was alright! I love her A LOT in the books and she was appropriately cute and rough-and-tumble and brave and take charge, but somehow... not... quite enough? I don't know. Movies just make it so much harder to connect with characters. LYRA AND PAN!!!! Really the silver guillotine scene was probably one of the most well-done, that part makes me saaaaaaaaaaad.
Oh man i can't believe they really showed Iorek ripping off Iofur's jaw. Everybody went like "AAAAAH WHAT?!" it was GREAT. That was my reaction when i read it! I didn't know if they'd actually show it because it is so surprisingly violent! I'm glad they did. :D
I could talk about niggling changed details a LOT, because they changed a LOT, as is the way things usually go. BUT I JUST HAD TO POST TO SAY HOW FREAKING DUMBFOUNDED I AM THAT THEY COMPLETELY LEFT OFF THE ENTIRE ENDING AND THAT WAS REALLY REALLY DUMB. DUMB. DUMBFOUNDINGLY DUMB. The movie just stopped! It even seemed like "that's it?" to my brother who hasn't read it, and like the book has a kind of abrupt ending just because big important shit happens right there at the very end, but it's not THAT abrupt! It's absolutely satisfying and awesome while leaving you craving so much more! I. CAN'T. UNDERSTAND. WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
I am going to be yelling about this all freaking weekend. I wish i could yell about it with you guys! I will reply to comments when i return, okay! SOMEONE HOLD ME. I need to go to my happy place where the book is perfect and makes me ridiculously happy about everything.
...I wrote a lot more than i'd planned to just now. O_o
SIGH.