Terri loves crisps
Weird things happen when you don't smoke cigarettes. However, given that I aspire (slightly) to be a writer, I feel justified in these weird thoughts, since I'm banking on them making me money some day. Anyway, that was your warning...and this is something I wrote, while sitting in the hall of Pray-Harrold. Judge away!
The fantasy geek
opened her crinkly bag of artificially flavored chips
She might as well have been glaring at me
and saying:
1, 2, 3, STRIKE! Here's where I ruin your life!
And off she went!
She picked up the first orange spectacle of modern invention
and her greedy mouth took a loud
CRUNCH
off the end.
and another.
and another.
and another.
Absent-mindedly ruining my solitude
with her head buried in some book about
dragons?
How I wish I was a dragon
Then I could breathe on you and you
and your STUPID chips would perish!
But instead you sit there
with your Doritos breath
loving every moment of this pleasant snack
While My Ears ring with
crunchy,lipsmacking,cracking,breathing,slurpy sounds!
Oh, you'll never have friends!
How do you turn me into such a monster,
fantasy geek?
Are those magical chips?
Did you learn some spell in your Nerdy Spell Book for Nerds?
I was such a nice person five minutes ago
and now I am this:
(wringing my hands, planning my way to attack.)
The Fantasy Geek sets down her book,
and expertly picks up her bag of chips.
She reaches her hand in, to pull out her reward.
Her tongue salivates onto her lips
Her taste buds become expectant
Her fingers twitch, ready for action
Her eyes glow red, she can't wait any longer!
and, swift!
She places the chip in her mouth
and for the last time- she did crunch.
Oh, what a beautiful crunch.
The fantasy geek
opened her crinkly bag of artificially flavored chips
She might as well have been glaring at me
and saying:
1, 2, 3, STRIKE! Here's where I ruin your life!
And off she went!
She picked up the first orange spectacle of modern invention
and her greedy mouth took a loud
CRUNCH
off the end.
and another.
and another.
and another.
Absent-mindedly ruining my solitude
with her head buried in some book about
dragons?
How I wish I was a dragon
Then I could breathe on you and you
and your STUPID chips would perish!
But instead you sit there
with your Doritos breath
loving every moment of this pleasant snack
While My Ears ring with
crunchy,lipsmacking,cracking,breathing,slurpy sounds!
Oh, you'll never have friends!
How do you turn me into such a monster,
fantasy geek?
Are those magical chips?
Did you learn some spell in your Nerdy Spell Book for Nerds?
I was such a nice person five minutes ago
and now I am this:
(wringing my hands, planning my way to attack.)
The Fantasy Geek sets down her book,
and expertly picks up her bag of chips.
She reaches her hand in, to pull out her reward.
Her tongue salivates onto her lips
Her taste buds become expectant
Her fingers twitch, ready for action
Her eyes glow red, she can't wait any longer!
and, swift!
She places the chip in her mouth
and for the last time- she did crunch.
Oh, what a beautiful crunch.