My brother is in jail again and very likely going to prison in the next month or so. The details don't matter; suffice it to say that his own appetites and clouded judgment over so many years finally caught up with him. It's true, Mr. Young. Every junkie's like a setting sun. It's been a slow and painful descent to watch, surreal to see this ( Read more... )

This day is always odd. I never can figure out if it is the beginning or end of my week, as it shifts and shapes itself according to what has come before it and what is on the horizon. The deer have already come and gone this morning, adjusting their routine to the heat, moving into the shadows when they can find them ( Read more... )

In a criminal case, the victim has a right to make a statement after the defendant is sentenced. This is called the victim's allocution. It is the single time that the victim is able to address the defendant directly, to speak her mind, to spill out everything that she's been choking down for months and months. I was witness to many of these ( Read more... )

I’ve been making my peace lately with something so profoundly difficult and painful that it’s taken over a year to even be able to talk about it. I finally have had to let go of the idea that I will be going back to my old job. When I left Texas, I left behind a career as a senior felony prosecutor at an office that I loved. One of my best ( Read more... )

The worst part was the waiting. Waiting for the night to be over, waiting to get home, waiting for the vet to show up. Watching the clock until the phone rang with the receptionist calling to tell me they were running late. A reprieve of sorts. Another half hour for him to lay across my chest, purring and nuzzling my chin. I didn't know what ( Read more... )

I dug my oldest cat's grave this afternoon. The vet's coming over tomorrow afternoon to put him down but I figured that the last thing I would want to do once it's done is dig a hole. I'm paying extra for the house call, but the almost 20 years of companionship is worth the cost. He deserves for the last thing he's knows on this earth to be home ( Read more... )

I'm sure I'm not the only one who's overcome with this horrible feeling that nothing I write means anything anymore. I catch myself thinking, "Ok, who do I want to propose to today?" and then I think, "Why bother?" Not that I've really been thinking that, but it illustrates my point. My day-to-day life seems so ridiculous now. It seems so ( Read more... )

I write this for Reive, not because our situations are so much alike, but because I want her to know that there is almost always a reward in moving forward even when you feel the urge to go back for something you left behind.

Walking Backwards In a SnowstormSurprisingly, I was the one who left. Fooled around on him even. Just a quick fuck with ( Read more... )

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Last night at dinner a man said this about his wife
(who wasn't there) to his friends:

"You know, we've been married over thirty years and sometimes
at night I wake up wanting to turn her over so I can check
for wings, because I think that she must be an angel."

It made me want to cry in my soup.