My couch could kick your couch's ass
Today I thought I should write about the awesome couch we have in our dorm room. This thing is the mercedes benz of funiture. Well maybe it's not at the forefront of fashionable furniture but it's comfortability cannot be denied. Let me give some quick specs on my couch:
Name: The Assmaster
Type: Couch
Nationality: American
Bought From: Salvation Army
Previous Owner: Either an old person or a crack dealer, the couch might have aids, we're not sure.
Strong Points: It makes your sitter happy, what more is a couch supposed to do.
Yeah I'm kinda not inspired today so i pieced together an entry, but thats because i wanted to publicly post the comment I made on patrice's journal, because i thought it was quite funny. So check it out below.
This part is for Patrice, in case you missed the comment I left on your livejournal. If you were ever to rent my room to an asian, vegetarian, midget from long island who was emo i think i would kick you so hard that grandma would feel it. Then i would apologize to grandma. Later hollywood would pick the story up and create a movie based on it. It would be entitled "The Kick heard round the World-The Alex Melville story" starring Brad Pitt as me and David Cross as you. The movie would open to atronomical box office sales, and critical acclaim. It would go on to win 27 oscars, 4 grammys, and a golden globe. It would also go on to be the highest grossing movie of all time, earning 4 billion in US box office sales alone.
The moral of the story is: I kick so much more ass than you!
I think I stated it quite nicely. Alex-1 Patrice- -1 (I took a point off zero because I know whatever response you make to this is gunna suck patrice)
thats it for today. Im out.
Name: The Assmaster
Type: Couch
Nationality: American
Bought From: Salvation Army
Previous Owner: Either an old person or a crack dealer, the couch might have aids, we're not sure.
Strong Points: It makes your sitter happy, what more is a couch supposed to do.
Yeah I'm kinda not inspired today so i pieced together an entry, but thats because i wanted to publicly post the comment I made on patrice's journal, because i thought it was quite funny. So check it out below.
This part is for Patrice, in case you missed the comment I left on your livejournal. If you were ever to rent my room to an asian, vegetarian, midget from long island who was emo i think i would kick you so hard that grandma would feel it. Then i would apologize to grandma. Later hollywood would pick the story up and create a movie based on it. It would be entitled "The Kick heard round the World-The Alex Melville story" starring Brad Pitt as me and David Cross as you. The movie would open to atronomical box office sales, and critical acclaim. It would go on to win 27 oscars, 4 grammys, and a golden globe. It would also go on to be the highest grossing movie of all time, earning 4 billion in US box office sales alone.
The moral of the story is: I kick so much more ass than you!
I think I stated it quite nicely. Alex-1 Patrice- -1 (I took a point off zero because I know whatever response you make to this is gunna suck patrice)
thats it for today. Im out.