(no subject)
i hate this place.
the only motivation i have anymore is to get as far away from here as possible.
school is going to suck.
i have recently realized that whenever i get excited about things, they find a way to fuck up.
or i find a way to fuck them up
or my father finds a way to fuck them up.
today was going to be amazing.
and not an hour after i stopped crying a went downstairs he asked me to get him a soda.
the sad thing is, i actually did it.
i wonder if he could possibly know how much i want to please him
how much i just want him to be proud of me.
and yet i live for the nights when he has to work and i don't have to see him.
i guess when you surround yourself with shit and fuck up as often as i do, things like this are bound to happen.
but hey now, i wouldn't wanna display this "woe-is-me" attitude i seem to have so often so, i'm gonna go to sleep and stop feeling sorry for myself.
happy birthday, lauren.
there are no words to describe how much i love you.
the only motivation i have anymore is to get as far away from here as possible.
school is going to suck.
i have recently realized that whenever i get excited about things, they find a way to fuck up.
or i find a way to fuck them up
or my father finds a way to fuck them up.
today was going to be amazing.
and not an hour after i stopped crying a went downstairs he asked me to get him a soda.
the sad thing is, i actually did it.
i wonder if he could possibly know how much i want to please him
how much i just want him to be proud of me.
and yet i live for the nights when he has to work and i don't have to see him.
i guess when you surround yourself with shit and fuck up as often as i do, things like this are bound to happen.
but hey now, i wouldn't wanna display this "woe-is-me" attitude i seem to have so often so, i'm gonna go to sleep and stop feeling sorry for myself.
happy birthday, lauren.
there are no words to describe how much i love you.