Trying to live

[thevilagemidiot]

I've been trying to just go on living my life as normal as possible for these past few weeks but it's just damn near impossible. I'm around those guys a lot at school. And it's not that I have anything against them (if you haven't already heard, Doru and I are fine now...I just have some things I need to talk to him about), but I always hear them

Comments

[thevilagemidiot]

I won't go back unless I know that Doru won't do that anymore. That's why I want to talk to him. I just need him to understand how I feel. I think we both misinterpret a lot of things that each of us say. I quit because I snapped. I was finally tired of how I was being treated. I miss it so much because of all of the good that came out of it and the love of what we were doing. It was one of the biggest parts of my life for 2 years.

Believe me. I'm thinking really hard about it. The thing was, when I was trying to explain myself to Doru the first time (and I didn't approach him the way I should have) he actually tried to kick me out. I didn't say anything before they kicked me out because I wasn't sure how to handle it. Quitting has given me so much time to think about what to do.

I need to talk to Doru and set some things straight. If all works out, I'll be back in. However, if he doesn't listen or doesn't understand where I'm coming from or isn't willing to try and change (I know I am) then I won't.

You have to understand, this was one of the biggest, if not the biggest part of my life for quite awhile. Whether I quit or get kicked out, I'm still going to miss it terribly. Think about how you'd feel if you ever broke up with Evan. You know you would miss him for a really long time (or rather...miss all the good you had with him) after even though you made the decision.

Thanks for being honest.

[guitarguysrule]

honestly, i really dont think Doru is going to change, no matter how much you try to talk to him. We both know him. He really only cares about what affects him and nothing else. He is stubborn and selfish. And even if he did see it from your point of view for the time being, it wouldn't last long. at all. I suggest if you're going to talk with him, you sit him down while his head isnt somewhere in the clouds and have a heart to heart talk ( a heart to heart with doru? good luck with that!) But hey, you got nothin to lose, right?

[thevilagemidiot]

That was actually my exact intent right there and you are right. I don't know if he'll listen. I do believe that there is a chance that he might and that he may actually understand what I'm trying to say. No matter how small that chance is, it's still there and that's more than enough for me to try. After all, like you said, I've got nothing to lose.