Re: France: Francis Bonnefoy
anonymous
July 23 2010, 05:40:23 UTC
Hrrrm. I think I want to see more of Francis' (successfully!) devious/manipulative side come out. We've seen flashes of it occasionally, but nothing more than that.
Re: France: Francis Bonnefoy
anonymous
July 23 2010, 08:13:52 UTC
Seconding the above anon. I love that your France has genuine class, but I feel that this holds you back a bit and makes his voice stiff at times. He's not a perfect model citizen by all means, and we know Francis is capable of being unscrupulous and getting his hands dirty (take that as you will). He's a pervert, and it it shouldn't be glaringly obvious all the time, but I just don't see Francis as having THAT much self-control. You give him too much credit. Like he could only take so much before he snapped and had to grab a boob or passionately make out with someone... without their consent. I know it can be difficult to play him as being smooth and irresistible when another mun simply won't let him get a crack at dat, but we need to see him being more touchy-feely regardless of whether it ends with a foot up his ass.
I also feel like you should do more to make his presence known. Throw parties, harass people in public, whatever. Everyone should know who he is somehow and be wary of seeing his dong in broad daylight.
Re: North Mexico: Juan Pedro de León
anonymous
July 24 2010, 02:43:13 UTC
Other than the fact that he needs to get his ass out there, I really love this character. He hasn't been taken out to play too much but you've made a seriously hilarious, endearing, and well-rounded kid here and I can see you taking him far if you could only get the chance.
Dude i've been in Europe for a month XD Give me a break!
Actually I sort of had the intention of giving him a real puffin when i got back home :) I just needed to figure out how to get a puffin to USA but eh..its Liberty XD
England: Arthur KirklandgodsavemyJuly 23 2010, 01:25:24 UTC
Comments? Suggestions? Questions? Constructive Criticism of all sorts about how am I doing as this old chap is welcome here! And is there anything in particular you wish to see from him? I promise to seriously consider whatever you have to say as long as you’re heartfelt in return~
Re: England: Arthur KirklandgodsavemyJuly 23 2010, 04:07:41 UTC
For England, one of the big problems I had was his age. Hidekaz made him 23, but compared to the rest of the characters that he would have a history with, 23 is kinda young.
On another hand, the stiff upper lip is in place, and he's not a moe blob of tsunderederedere. It'd be cool to see some more foreign relations and maybe some more history!relations with America, Fransu, Canada, and other European nations. It can be back story too. But you sometimes lack the whole British Empire sadistic part of England that is evidently still a part of him, so it'd be cool to see that side more too.
Thanks for your feedback~godsavemyJuly 23 2010, 04:46:05 UTC
H-haha, I'm afraid the age thing is kinda out of my hands since there's a lot of dates that were figured based on Arthur's age (along with the rest of his siblings' ages) and have been remarked upon in a good number of posts. But i-if it makes you feel better, Arthur turned 24 back in April?
And I would love love love to showcase more of that sadistic streak, even if it's just a time warp thread. Siiince that sort of thing is what I imagine what Arthur tries to repress daily as it was so prevalent back in his youthful daaaays. But with the right circumstances... :D
Re: England: Arthur KirklandgodsavemyJuly 23 2010, 08:29:07 UTC
I agree with the first annon about the British Empire.
Supposedly, British Empire was supposed to be Papa Kirkland, but who says? England was a ruthless conqueror, and I would love to see that darker side of him more.
Sometimes I feel like Jared’s personality is a little...disjointed at times? First he’s this crabby teacher that’s not afraid to whip his students and other irritating people into shape with a good tongue lashing and also suffers bouts of extreme angst and then...
Hm, I realize his secret is that he loves musicals, but sometimes it’s maybe a bit too heavy-handed at times? It’s like this airy side of him that’s memorized lyrics of the great musicals and sometimes isn't afraid to sing them out loud is too much of a contrast of his angst muffin side to make sense sometimes.
B-but I realized that this might just be played up for laughs, so I'll shut up now.
Re: The Iroquois Nation: Jiwa "Jared" Montour
anonymous
July 23 2010, 08:20:12 UTC
Not gonna lie: I haven't talked to you very much, but after a while of reading Jared, I started to notice something. Namely, that Jared seems to reflect a lot of you personally and in his interests. I read your comment above about the "spontaneity" but I'm just not seeing it click here; it comes off too much like you trying to please the masses by making him relatable/likable to everyone. You've got a good thing going with Mr. Crabby and acerbic, and it undermines that when his mood does a 360 out of nowhere.
Re: The Iroquois Nation: Jiwa "Jared" Montour
anonymous
July 24 2010, 21:39:49 UTC
Agreed with the above anons. I liked the part of him that made him a teacher that wouldn't be afraid to just lash out at his students and make them pay attention because the professor is talking, damn it! But lately, he's been on an emo train, and I think that it's okay to have angst, but I miss seeing the Jared that was able to make it all work together. Like, because he's mad about a lot of things, and because he's slowly losing his eyesight, he acts in this manner, and for this reason, people are reacting in this manner back at him. And you were able to make it funny in a few of the threads, and make him a relatable character, but these days, he's a lot more disjointed and there lacks a sense of direction with his character.
I hope this is helpful and that I didn't just ramble on without being of assistance.
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I also feel like you should do more to make his presence known. Throw parties, harass people in public, whatever. Everyone should know who he is somehow and be wary of seeing his dong in broad daylight.
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Please leave any comments and criticism here because it would be super helpful <3 Thanks
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And (because I'm mean) I-I kinda want to see Valdi go through MAJOR money issues. But that's just me~
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Actually I sort of had the intention of giving him a real puffin when i got back home :) I just needed to figure out how to get a puffin to USA but eh..its Liberty XD
Will do! *salutes*
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Thank you if you comment! ♥
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On another hand, the stiff upper lip is in place, and he's not a moe blob of tsunderederedere. It'd be cool to see some more foreign relations and maybe some more history!relations with America, Fransu, Canada, and other European nations. It can be back story too. But you sometimes lack the whole British Empire sadistic part of England that is evidently still a part of him, so it'd be cool to see that side more too.
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And I would love love love to showcase more of that sadistic streak, even if it's just a time warp thread. Siiince that sort of thing is what I imagine what Arthur tries to repress daily as it was so prevalent back in his youthful daaaays. But with the right circumstances... :D
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Supposedly, British Empire was supposed to be Papa Kirkland, but who says? England was a ruthless conqueror, and I would love to see that darker side of him more.
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Hm, I realize his secret is that he loves musicals, but sometimes it’s maybe a bit too heavy-handed at times? It’s like this airy side of him that’s memorized lyrics of the great musicals and sometimes isn't afraid to sing them out loud is too much of a contrast of his angst muffin side to make sense sometimes.
B-but I realized that this might just be played up for laughs, so I'll shut up now.
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I hope this is helpful and that I didn't just ramble on without being of assistance.
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