Luna (Not So) Lunes Linkies - Round Three
Before I really get underway with the links this week, I'd like to take a step back and reflect upon last week's entry, particularly exclusively about the 4chan anti-Scientology/Project Chanology rallies that happened this last Sunday. I'd like to direct you to Encyclopedia Dramatica which, while I tend to avoid it like the plague * (much like 4chan, incidentally) has not only a list of the "epics wins for ANONYMOUS" ** (that occurred internationally AND in fair numbers) but their entry on Scientology is probably the most, dare I say it, thoughtfully written entry I've ever seen on that site while still being... well. Encyclopedia Dramatica. At least, it was fairly thought through. Visiting it now, it seems the entry has undergone a few edits I don't recall seeing before, but the main messages are still pretty much the same.
One of the other Scientology related links I wanted to share was The Top Ten Celebrities That You'd Never Guess Were Scientologists. PLEASE check that web page out before the Encyclopedia Dramatica website, for if you go to Encyclopedia Dramatica first, it will ruin the big punchline for the top ten list. Regardless, the Project Chanology website AND the top ten list (provided by cracked.com) are both hilarious or rather, in the vain of things, for teh epic lulz.
I bring up the Scientology thing again because well, it sort of spurred me to look up more about Scientology for one. I found out that it ultimately more to it than just Tom Cruise jumping up on a couch and killing Oprah.
Tom Cruise: finish them.
Scientology, by the way, became infinitely more bat-shit in my mind (and I do like to think I don't try and squash people's personal beliefs while keeping an open mind ***). It was enlightening. On a more mundane point... what? Battlefield Earth is a Scientology thing?. LESS mundanely was watching videos like when what happens when Scientology members find a guy who has publicly spoken out against Scientology before:
Before you ask, I don't know WHY the guy was there with a camera... presumably to record what he could of a Scientology meeting. This video is amazing because it causes me to want to laugh, cry, AND punch someone all at the same time.
Oh yeah, and since this seems to be the secondary reaction a lot of people have had when I showed them this video: enturbulation was made up for the context of Scientology. (I tried getting it off of Marriam-Webster aka "The Dictionary" and got this.)
The OTHER reason why I bring up the Scientology thing is that it was something I found on my own... which I posted on and then found out that two of the blogs I regularly check up on for odd news also posted after me. It made me feel incredibly special for all of two seconds.
It was also quite fun reading on those far 'more public blogs the whole, "but it's 4chan" versus "...but it's Scientology," debate/comment arguments (and generally, which one do people find MORE offensive). Since I'm not posting every argument that was brought up, one person seemed to sum things up perfectly: "Why can’t we all just... collectively catch on to the infinitely-layered internet oligarchy that is 4chan?".
So I give my huzzahs to the folks who protested peacefully. I also gave massive lulz to every interview I saw with a member of Scientology who called Project Chanology/Team Anonymous "a terrorist group."
By viewing the Chanology website, you can ALSO see that future protests are already being planned (seems for approximately the Ides of March/March 15th). How's that for ya: 4chan organization and follow through. It blows my mind.
******
Now that that's out of the way, I have a confession. I completely forgot that Wednesday was fast approaching until it WAS Wednesday. Never fret, childrens, for I had a back-up plan for days like these (4). I anticipated this happening at some point (indeed, I joked with Tegan about it one day) and, knowing that, had a spare entry written up just in case. The below post (and kept behind an LJ-cut) is full of a bunch of fun links all from cracked.com (as alluded to above). Cracked has wonderful moments where they count down the top ten, eight, fifteen whatevers to whatever. You'll see what I mean when you read the post below but in short: cracked is like YouTube: you can start off looking at one thing and end up watching something completely different than what you started with. This entry is basically the product of that: I started looking at one thing and before I knew it, I had a bunch of fun links to share. Rather than post one or two at a time every week (and, by extension, have to guys already see all of them before I even posted them you would have done exactly what I did), I did all of the "work" for you.
It's likely to waste hours of your time looking through and reading, but I've cut out the middle man of having to find the stuff (which I wasted even more hours).
In no particular order (and not including the Scientology list from above) here are some of my favorite Cracked.com posts:
WTF!? The 8 Strangest Communities on the Web - mildly NSFW
Awesome Lines: "What does that mean for you, the curious, newbie player? It means that walking around Second Life is like walking around in some weird, virtual post-apocalyptic zombie movie, only instead of encountering zombies, you occasionally stumble across some dude dressed up like a mechanical teddy bear having sex with a giant cat."
The 9 Most Racist Disney Characters
Awesome Line: "'Let me see. A genuine African native,' Mickey murmured. 'Perhaps I should start showing him off.'"
5 Movie Martial Artists That Lost a Deathmatch With Dignity
Awesome Lines: "Steven Seagal adopts homeless animals. Not so badass? His two dogs are named Chaos and Fist. Holy shit! Here's your ass, by the way, you might want it back after Seagal's life knocked it off of you."
LUNA NOTE: By the way, Steven Seagal is on the list <--- OOH SPOILER.
YouTube's 7 Scariest Teachers - mildly NSFW
Awesome Lines: "Also, it would appear that whomever filmed this is no longer on this earth, as can be gathered from the furious look on the professor's face when he sees the camera followed by the camera cutting off. It's like a Middle Eastern version of The Blair Witch Project."
7 Viral Videos You Didn't Know Were Staged (And How They Did It)
Awesome Line: Today we're taking a stand and saying, 'Fuck you, Grandma. That shit was staged.'"
LUNA NOTE: This is the only video that absolutely had to go after the previous link, as cracked realized that one of the "scary teachers" they posted was amongst the staged.
The 6 Cutest Animals That Can Still Destroy You
Awesome Line: "This is mother nature's way of saying, 'I made this thing out of spare parts I found on the workshop floor, and it can still fucking cripple you.'"
LUNA NOTE: I was only surprised by one of these.
The 5 Most Ill-Conceived Action Figures
Awesome Lines: "Sure, a more inventive kid could open and drain the doll, then fill it with strawberry jam and watch the 'guts' spurt out as they crush him with a rock. But at that point you're making your own fun and the toy has failed you."
5 Douchebag Behaviors Explained By Science
Awesome Lines: "The onset of this disorder is common at ages 40 to 55 but may happen as early as 35 or as late as 65. Although, a definite age is difficult to pinpoint if the male in question has been a prick their whole life."
The 5 Most Horrifying Bugs in the World
Awesome Line: "Nature is fucking hardcore."
LUNA NOTE: I knew about all of their picks, strangely, however I have a youtube video from ages ago that I collected, which was way before I read this article, about their first pick. You can watch it here and feel a little less bad for its chosen prey and a little more freaked out by ANOTHER freaky bug. Nature tends to be awesome like that.
8 Celebities You Didn't Know Were Geeks
Awesome Lines: "By the time she got her bachelor's, she had studied four languages in addition to Hebrew, the language of her birth, had been published in professional science journals twice, killed an ass-load of aliens, and generally made us look like big human-shaped piles of poo."
LUNA NOTE: This article prompted my status that was up for most of a half week until last night.
10 Words and Phrases You Won't Believe Shakespeare Invented
Awesome Line: "I'd rather blow the King of France than do what you just said."
The 25 Most Baffling Toys From Around the World
Awesome Lines: "When either of the two buttons are pressed, he exclaims a short burst of pro-toilet-training rhetoric. 'Crap! Crap like a champion!' and 'RRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHH!' seem the likeliest options."
The 10 Lamest Super Bow XLII Ads
Awesome Lines:: ""I think they’re relying on the fact that the word 'badger' sounds funny."
"HAHAHA!"
"Badger."
"HAHAHA! Stop it!"
"Badger."
"SERIOUSLY! I CAN’T BREATHE! Oh, man, I’m totally going to go buy a Lexus."
"It’s a Toyota commercial."
"I don’t even fucking care anymore. All I know is I’m delirious with laughter. Clearly, this commercial succeeded. Lexus dealership here I come!""
The top 25 Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians
Awesome Line: "Looks like: an author of a paper stating sex with a man is, by definition, a hate crime."
And to conclude (and by far my favorite):
The 9 Most Badass Bible Verses
Awesome Lines: "As the lifeless body slumps to the ground, Moses lights up a cigar. 'Well,' he quips, 'looks like someone bit off more than he could Jew.'"
I wonder how much of your day this post will waste.
------
* Unless I need knowledge on the origins of the latest meme. Then Encyclopedia Dramatica becomes something like "a valuable resource."
** This translates to, in plain English, a list of news reports and videos and "reports from the frontlines," that were taken about the rallies, etc. This also translates to, "holy fuck, 4chan actually did something? Meaningful even? What?"
*** This is the time I'd also like to say I'm sure there are some very pleasant people who practice Scientology, as much as I'm finding that concept difficult at the moment. And I'm not likely going to try and attack someone if they tell me they're a Scientologist... just become incredibly creeped out
(4) This also means I'm completely fucked if it happens again. Except I have about 3597205729ryh9357 YouTube videos I can fall back on, so not really.
One of the other Scientology related links I wanted to share was The Top Ten Celebrities That You'd Never Guess Were Scientologists. PLEASE check that web page out before the Encyclopedia Dramatica website, for if you go to Encyclopedia Dramatica first, it will ruin the big punchline for the top ten list. Regardless, the Project Chanology website AND the top ten list (provided by cracked.com) are both hilarious or rather, in the vain of things, for teh epic lulz.
I bring up the Scientology thing again because well, it sort of spurred me to look up more about Scientology for one. I found out that it ultimately more to it than just Tom Cruise jumping up on a couch and killing Oprah.
Click to viewTom Cruise: finish them.
Scientology, by the way, became infinitely more bat-shit in my mind (and I do like to think I don't try and squash people's personal beliefs while keeping an open mind ***). It was enlightening. On a more mundane point... what? Battlefield Earth is a Scientology thing?. LESS mundanely was watching videos like when what happens when Scientology members find a guy who has publicly spoken out against Scientology before:
Before you ask, I don't know WHY the guy was there with a camera... presumably to record what he could of a Scientology meeting. This video is amazing because it causes me to want to laugh, cry, AND punch someone all at the same time.
Oh yeah, and since this seems to be the secondary reaction a lot of people have had when I showed them this video: enturbulation was made up for the context of Scientology. (I tried getting it off of Marriam-Webster aka "The Dictionary" and got this.)
The OTHER reason why I bring up the Scientology thing is that it was something I found on my own... which I posted on and then found out that two of the blogs I regularly check up on for odd news also posted after me. It made me feel incredibly special for all of two seconds.
It was also quite fun reading on those far 'more public blogs the whole, "but it's 4chan" versus "...but it's Scientology," debate/comment arguments (and generally, which one do people find MORE offensive). Since I'm not posting every argument that was brought up, one person seemed to sum things up perfectly: "Why can’t we all just... collectively catch on to the infinitely-layered internet oligarchy that is 4chan?".
So I give my huzzahs to the folks who protested peacefully. I also gave massive lulz to every interview I saw with a member of Scientology who called Project Chanology/Team Anonymous "a terrorist group."
By viewing the Chanology website, you can ALSO see that future protests are already being planned (seems for approximately the Ides of March/March 15th). How's that for ya: 4chan organization and follow through. It blows my mind.
******
Now that that's out of the way, I have a confession. I completely forgot that Wednesday was fast approaching until it WAS Wednesday. Never fret, childrens, for I had a back-up plan for days like these (4). I anticipated this happening at some point (indeed, I joked with Tegan about it one day) and, knowing that, had a spare entry written up just in case. The below post (and kept behind an LJ-cut) is full of a bunch of fun links all from cracked.com (as alluded to above). Cracked has wonderful moments where they count down the top ten, eight, fifteen whatevers to whatever. You'll see what I mean when you read the post below but in short: cracked is like YouTube: you can start off looking at one thing and end up watching something completely different than what you started with. This entry is basically the product of that: I started looking at one thing and before I knew it, I had a bunch of fun links to share. Rather than post one or two at a time every week (and, by extension, have to guys already see all of them before I even posted them you would have done exactly what I did), I did all of the "work" for you.
It's likely to waste hours of your time looking through and reading, but I've cut out the middle man of having to find the stuff (which I wasted even more hours).
In no particular order (and not including the Scientology list from above) here are some of my favorite Cracked.com posts:
Awesome Lines: "What does that mean for you, the curious, newbie player? It means that walking around Second Life is like walking around in some weird, virtual post-apocalyptic zombie movie, only instead of encountering zombies, you occasionally stumble across some dude dressed up like a mechanical teddy bear having sex with a giant cat."
Awesome Line: "'Let me see. A genuine African native,' Mickey murmured. 'Perhaps I should start showing him off.'"
Awesome Lines: "Steven Seagal adopts homeless animals. Not so badass? His two dogs are named Chaos and Fist. Holy shit! Here's your ass, by the way, you might want it back after Seagal's life knocked it off of you."
LUNA NOTE: By the way, Steven Seagal is on the list <--- OOH SPOILER.
Awesome Lines: "Also, it would appear that whomever filmed this is no longer on this earth, as can be gathered from the furious look on the professor's face when he sees the camera followed by the camera cutting off. It's like a Middle Eastern version of The Blair Witch Project."
Awesome Line: Today we're taking a stand and saying, 'Fuck you, Grandma. That shit was staged.'"
LUNA NOTE: This is the only video that absolutely had to go after the previous link, as cracked realized that one of the "scary teachers" they posted was amongst the staged.
Awesome Line: "This is mother nature's way of saying, 'I made this thing out of spare parts I found on the workshop floor, and it can still fucking cripple you.'"
LUNA NOTE: I was only surprised by one of these.
Awesome Lines: "Sure, a more inventive kid could open and drain the doll, then fill it with strawberry jam and watch the 'guts' spurt out as they crush him with a rock. But at that point you're making your own fun and the toy has failed you."
Awesome Lines: "The onset of this disorder is common at ages 40 to 55 but may happen as early as 35 or as late as 65. Although, a definite age is difficult to pinpoint if the male in question has been a prick their whole life."
Awesome Line: "Nature is fucking hardcore."
LUNA NOTE: I knew about all of their picks, strangely, however I have a youtube video from ages ago that I collected, which was way before I read this article, about their first pick. You can watch it here and feel a little less bad for its chosen prey and a little more freaked out by ANOTHER freaky bug. Nature tends to be awesome like that.
Awesome Lines: "By the time she got her bachelor's, she had studied four languages in addition to Hebrew, the language of her birth, had been published in professional science journals twice, killed an ass-load of aliens, and generally made us look like big human-shaped piles of poo."
LUNA NOTE: This article prompted my status that was up for most of a half week until last night.
Awesome Line: "I'd rather blow the King of France than do what you just said."
Awesome Lines: "When either of the two buttons are pressed, he exclaims a short burst of pro-toilet-training rhetoric. 'Crap! Crap like a champion!' and 'RRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHH!' seem the likeliest options."
Awesome Lines:: ""I think they’re relying on the fact that the word 'badger' sounds funny."
"HAHAHA!"
"Badger."
"HAHAHA! Stop it!"
"Badger."
"SERIOUSLY! I CAN’T BREATHE! Oh, man, I’m totally going to go buy a Lexus."
"It’s a Toyota commercial."
"I don’t even fucking care anymore. All I know is I’m delirious with laughter. Clearly, this commercial succeeded. Lexus dealership here I come!""
Awesome Line: "Looks like: an author of a paper stating sex with a man is, by definition, a hate crime."
And to conclude (and by far my favorite):
Awesome Lines: "As the lifeless body slumps to the ground, Moses lights up a cigar. 'Well,' he quips, 'looks like someone bit off more than he could Jew.'"
I wonder how much of your day this post will waste.
------
* Unless I need knowledge on the origins of the latest meme. Then Encyclopedia Dramatica becomes something like "a valuable resource."
** This translates to, in plain English, a list of news reports and videos and "reports from the frontlines," that were taken about the rallies, etc. This also translates to, "holy fuck, 4chan actually did something? Meaningful even? What?"
*** This is the time I'd also like to say I'm sure there are some very pleasant people who practice Scientology, as much as I'm finding that concept difficult at the moment. And I'm not likely going to try and attack someone if they tell me they're a Scientologist... just become incredibly creeped out
(4) This also means I'm completely fucked if it happens again. Except I have about 3597205729ryh9357 YouTube videos I can fall back on, so not really.