One-Shot ~ Break (me) down
Title: Break (me) down
Author: lalois
Fandom: Kanjani8
Pairings: RyOhkura
Rating: R
Length: one-shot
Words: 3180
Genre: fluff, ust, smut, established relationship, long-distance relationship, social distancing, friendship
Disclaimer: sadly I don’t own anything about Kanjani8, just my worship for my OTP. They don't belong to me, but they belong to each other.
Prompt/Summary/Background: Ohkura’s washing machine and wifi have broken down. Ryo has a reputation for being an excellent repairman. Japan is in lockdown, and TORN’s relationship has been awkward way before the pandemic. Inspired by Ohkura's Kurasumasu May posts.
Written on: 16th May 2020.
Also available @ Ao3, LJ, DW
14th May 2020
He's tried his best, but he has to admit he's a total failure when it comes to technical issues, so it's no wonder that the glue he's put on his poor broken washing machine keeps peeling down and does not help at all.
Ohkura sighs.
He does not want to do what he's about to do, but he's got no other choice. The customer service office just kept repeating him that during the lockdown, none of them will be providing home assistance, and the tips they suggested during the phone call, for a hand-made repair, are as useful as the useless glue.
But with work slowly needing him to go to the Jimusho offices, there is no way he's willing to show up there with dirty clothes, and waiting for hours outside a laundry station is out of question, either.
So it's with complicated feelings and regret that he's dialling a shortcut he's not called for long, maybe too long, and when Ryo replies, in a surprised voice, he cannot help but jolt.
"Hi, Ryochan... I... I hope you're fine, first of all. Are you okay?"
“I am, thank you. How about you, Ohkura?”
"I'm sorry I called, actually, but I thought... well, maybe it's just a bother..."
“Are you alright, Ohkura? “ Ryo asks, sounding worried.
"I'm fine. But my washing machine isn't. It broke down a few days ago, I tried to fix it myself but it didn't work and I don't know what else to do, since assistance isn't going to help either this time... May I ask for you help? Am I a bother?"
“You'll never be, Ohkura... c'mon,” Ryo replies, sounding half-amused. “I'll hang up and video call you, okay? So that you can show me the machine and it'll help finding out the problem, I hope.”
Ohkura does as asked, and he carefully follows Ryo's instructions to operate as he suggests, in order to try to repair the broken appliance. But after a long while the washing machine does not seem willing to start again any soon, and the drummer groans, covered in sweat.
"I'm sorry it didn't work," Ryo apologizes.
"No, no, please... I'm sorry I called, Ryochan," he retorts as soon as he can retrieve his mobile with his hands. "I didn't have to bother you in the first place, it's just that-"
"That you panic, right? Whenever your beloved washing machine is not by your side as it should, you start panicking unconsciously," Ryo completes for him.
"Uhm... yeah. I guess."
"I'll make sure I can find a proper technician who can come, okay? Please leave it to me."
"You needn't, Ryochan, pleas-"
"Please, Ohkura," Ryo cuts him off. "Please allow me to do at least this, for you. Please."
There's more than just a washing machine in Ryo's words, and they both know that; so Ohkura agrees, and says bye with a proper thanks and a warmer heart, when he hangs up.
17th May 2020
When three days later his doorbell rings, he doesn't expect the technician to show up this soon.
And it's not him, actually. There's no other than Ryo himself on the threshold of his apartment, wearing a baseball cap and a surgery mask and carrying a tool box in his right hand.
"Hi," the shy guys says. "May I check the naughty machine?"
Ohkura is still frozen solid and speechless on the threshold. They haven't seen each other since that fateful day of eight months before, nor kept in touch. It's been all too frenzy and too complicated for both of them, unconsciously deciding to postpone any debate to a more proper quiet moment in the future; but even when the whole world stopped down, a proper talk has not come. Last thing Ohkura expected, even after his unfortunate call, was to see the object of his lingering depression stand right before him now, right when a lockdown is going on and people are expected not to move from home unless it's very, very and again important.
"You were right, no one is willing to come as of now," Ryo explains. "But I just couldn't let it go, okay? I owe you."
Ohkura blinks, checking from the tool box to Ryo's worried eyes.
"Is it okay if I come in, Ohkura, or would you prefer me not to?" Ryo tentatively says. "I'd understand, of course, I can turn on my heels and-"
"I don't want you to go away," Ohkura confesses all at once. He feels like he should say an avalanche of other important things but he manages to handle none, while he lets Ryo in and he watches him put plastic gloves on and make his way towards the place where his washing machine is located; as if it was Ryo's own place, the one he's easily juggling in.
Ohkura retrieves his own cotton washable mask and wears it, before following Ryo at distance until in front of the washing machine; he watches Ryo peer into the appliance as if the metallic object was guarding a mystery.
"… Seems like I have to disassemble a few pieces... is it okay for you?" he asks, looking up at the drummer and furrowing deeply.
Ohkura shrugs.
"Please have fun. I thought I could learn something useful just by watching you doing this, but it does honestly seem still an obscure universe to me."
Ryo giggles softly.
"You said the same about the guitar and the piano back then, and look where you are now: skillfully using or learning them," he reminds him, much to Ohkura's soft pout.
"Might as well be, but facts are that your hands are capable of doing everything, unlike mine."
"I wouldn't say so," Ryo retorts.
"Mh. Call me when you'll be tired of having a fight with the damn appliance, then. I'll come and rescue you," Ohkura waves at him, leaving him alone.
About an hour and a half later, Ryo shows up in the kitchen where Ohkura is preparing lunch for both, wearing disposable plastic gloves.
"Oi," the drummer welcomes him, looking up from the stove, "you look as disheveled as after some good... nothing, sorry," he trails off, biting his lip. "Aren't you thirsty, Ryochan?" he asks him, offering him quickly some fresh water.
"Aaaaaaaaahhh," Ryo rejoices after gulping it down. "Hey, Ohkura, I'm the winner, you know?" he proudly announces, grinning. "Your washing machine has come back to life."
"Eh? Really?!"
"Yeah, of course. But I guess you mentioned in your posts that your wifi has also broken down, isn't that so?"
"Are you by any chance reading-"
"Where's the wifi router, Ohkura?"
The drummer narrows his eyes. He'd love to know more, whether Ryo is curious about him enough to read his posts through a secret Jimusho account, or if he just scrolls down certain tweets from his SNS official profile. Either way it's too damn tempting for him and too dangerous to ask, at the same time, for Ryo looks as hermetic as usual.
In a matter of time Ryo is done with the capricious wifi as well, much to Ohkura's open bewilderment.
"How did you even make it?" He babbles, checking on his iPad how everything is back to normality, in fact. Like a magic taking place thanks to a former nerdy idol miraculously popping up at his place.
"I'm... moved," Ohkura murmurs, looking up from his electronic device to Ryo, who is beaming at him even through the surgery mask.
"It's nothing, really."
"No, no... Please send me the invoice."
"You wish, Ohkura. Birthday treat."
"It was yesterday, actually," the drummer retorts, cocking his head to one side. "Thanks for your message, by the way. I really appreciated it."
"I thought... I thought about showing up here yesterday, actually," Ryo confesses, avoiding the drummer's eyes, "but it would have been honestly quite embarrassing to come on your birthday exactly, even if in the end it's very embarrassing anyway..." he looks up, meeting Ohkura's soft gaze.
They stare at each other for long, without a word, before Ohkura breaks eye contact and trots towards the kitchen. When he comes back, it's with a bag filled with a few Termobox containers.
"Here," he explains, offering it to Ryo. "I knew you'd refuse any compensation, that's why I made yakisoba and your favourite salad for you. We cannot eat that together as of now due to social distancing rules, but I thought you'd have maybe appreciated it later. I cooked everything using gloves and masks, so I made sure you don't have to worry about infection. Also, it should stay warm enough until your place, should you wish to eat it immediately."
"Talking about hands which can do nothing, ne?" Ryo objects in a thick voice, while accepting the bag.
Their fingers accidentally touch when Ohkura entrusts Ryo with the precious bento, but the taller guy does nothing to loosen the grip, even when the handles of the bag are safely into Ryo's hands.
"I... I need to get going," Ryo tentatively croaks.
"Sure. Sorry," Ohkura replies, stepping suddenly backwards.
Ryo turns on his heels, facing the door, then turns again.
"See you, then," he murmurs, however knowing that there probably won't be an 'again' for them, and Ohkura equally knows that. And then it's suddenly the drummer's masked mouth pressed against his own one, and the grip of his own fingers around the toolbox and the bag is released at once and both items fall beside him with a loud thump.
It's not really a kiss like this, there's no taste involved and no passion can be evoked and still, Ohkura can feel the lingering smell of Ryo's cigarettes and the latter is invaded by the drummer's familiar fragrance.
Ryo's gloved hands automatically close around Ohkura's back and neck and he pulls him towards him, hugging him tight, more than he should and definitely not like he's supposed to do, under the actual circumstances and the previous ones.
Abstinence and deprivation have started long before the lockdown for the two of them, and the sudden realization hurts both.
Ohkura pulls back from him, looking at fault, even when Ryo's apologetic smile tries to reassure him that nothing is so wrong. Ryo's gloved fingers intentionally search for Ohkura's equally covered ones, as they softly lock gazes again, and the warm contact of fingers intertwining despite the plastic separating them feels like unexpected heaven already.
"I should really get going, now," Ryo fumbles a second time. Ohkura's eyes laugh, apologizing already.
"I'll be keeping my paws to myself, this time," he assures Ryo, much to the latter's soft giggle. "... I'm sorry, Ryochan."
"Don't be, because I am not," Ryo replies, furrowing deeply, leaning to retrieve the two boxes again.
"Then... thank you. A lot," Ohkura hopefully murmurs, waving at him. He's glad the mask does not allow Ryo to see he's faintly blushing. 35 years old and still blushing in front of another man, like the open fan boy he's never stopped being.
"Anytime," Ryo says, looking fairly embarrassed before letting the door close behind him.
It's still echoing loudly in Ohkura's ears, the heartbeat that has not stopped being crazy ever since his crazy doings.
He wished himself a good year after his birthday, and he has to admit it's not been a bad start as of now. Definitely not.
**
Thirty minutes have not passed yet since Ryo left, but there's an incoming video call from him on Ohkura's mobile, and the latter quickly replies, wondering if there's anything wrong with him.
"Moshi-Moshi?"
"Hey," Ryo replies, looking a bit upset.
"Are you okay? Uhm, did you maybe forget something at my place, Ryochan?" Ohkura asks frowning.
"Yes. No. Probably," Ryo impatiently says. "Would you find me creepy if I were to tell you I wanna make love to you right now?"
For a long moment, Ohkura cannot speak, and all he can think about are the hours spent in front of the TV bawling like a helpless child watching and re-watching non-stop the NOMAD Live tour DVD and the hotness and temptation that Ryo is even through a screen, and all the times he's finished himself off just like that. Like an idiot.
"I'm just an idiot thinking like this, right?" Ryo sighs, involuntarily echoing the disclosed chaos in Ohkura's mind.
"No. I mean, if you are, than I am, as well," he stumbles on his words, biting his lip.
There's no incoming reply from Ryo, but the drummer knows it's not needed. Not when a breach has been opened and they're both jumping in.
"I wanted to kiss you without the damn mask," Ryo confesses.
"I wanted you to stay," Ohkura mirrors him.
Neither of them asks 'then why?', because both guys already know the answer. 'I wanna protect you', each of them could reply through the lyrics that Ohkura has once put in a old beloved song.
He swiftly slips off his hoodie once he reaches his bedroom, allowing Ryo to see everything through the mobile he's thrown right on the middle of the mattress, climbing the bed on his knees before sitting on his heels, right before the mobile.
Ryo must have a nice sight of his crotch, unconsciously towering on the camera, but he does not flinch.
"I want you naked," Ohkura commands, not caring if he's acting too bitchy, too suddenly, too greedy. He's been patient and understanding and even compliant for long, probably too long, and it's not without satisfaction that he can see Ryo obeying to his request, stripping off slowly for him only. But then, it's a focus on Ryo's mouth the only thing Ohkura can see, from the thin moustache above to the alluring lips conjuring another request.
"I'm into your pants, babe," Ryo murmurs softly, "and I am stroking you hard, like you like it best. C'mon, show me. Show me."
Ohkura takes his mobile in one hand and slips the other one into his hot pants. He closes his eyes, showing Ryo his face in awe while he allows himself to deal with the pleasure he's felt guilty towards for the last eight months.
"Ryochan...," he cries softly, ashamed of what he's going to ask next. "Ryochan, during this time, have you ever-"
"No, Ohkura," Ryo cuts him off, hissing almost. "Never."
"How about that Osakan comedia-"
"I thought we were more than just a bunch of shitty rumours, Tatsu," Ryo hisses, sounding suddenly tired and hurt.
"And I thought it would hurt less than this, having you so far away," Ohkura replies, wiping a tear away. "I'm sorry I'm this weak. I'm sorry I miss you this much. I'm sorry I'm coming on this relief alone, Ryochan," he admits hiccupping, right before a strangled moan fills the room and the video call as well.
"... I'm a mess now, literally and not," the drummer whispers then, when he retrieves the mobile and Ryo can see how red his cheeks are, how thick the wave of pleasure has clouded his eyes.
"You're as amazing as usual," Ryo sweetly tells him, unavoidable and unmistakable pride clear in his voice. "You know, I've been masturbating thoroughly all this time... better than nothing, I thought. But when I smelled your scent before, and it filled my nostrils when we kissed and hugged... it honestly became too much, I guess. You're so real and alive that the realization almost scared me."
"I want your cock, Ryochan," the drummer retorts, still panting hard. Through the mobile, he shows Ryo how he gets rid of his pants and wet underwear, framing the curve of his ass only next, from behind. "I want you here, Ryochan, filling me hard."
"Me too...," Ryo confesses in a hoarse voice. They both leave it to their own fingers then, howling when the vocal teasing finally helps reaching the craved completion, murmuring each other's name until it hurts the soul, more than the spent bodies.
"I probably never told you before, but I wanna dig my fingers in your hair, Ryochan," Ohkura tweets after a while, when they're both lying on one side in bed, both caressing the small corners of the mobile screen, trying to reach the other as if each were just behind a mirror. "I'd love you to caress me like you did to your guitars and microphone, during your live tour. They sounded so beautiful. So very much loved and cared for."
"Because you were there with me, Ohkura," Ryo tells him, propping himself on one elbow. "The truth is, wherever I go and whatever I do, you're still with me always. In the songs I play and in the ones I don't, because of reasons. I can feel it so much that sometimes I do even wonder whether I'm not disturbing you in your sleep like a wicked nightmare sucking up your soul or something like that."
"So I was not... imagining things," Ohkura timidly tries.
"Have you ever, honestly?"
The drummer cracks up softly, making Ryo open up in a gorgeous beaming smile.
"By the way, your right nipple is as tempting as always," Ryo teases, noticing how the camera has slipped down focusing on a small part of Ohkura's bare chest rather than his face. "Can't wait to lick it soon."
The drummer starts twitching it between his fingertips, making sure the camera includes all the details of the rosy turgid skin.
"Don't make it harder than it already is!" Ryo whines, rubbing his own face with his fingers, out of sheer frustration.
“Your puns are always adorable, Ryochan.”
“That was not- aaaaargh, you idiot!!” Ryo howls.
"Thanks for making me feel I'm your fave bitch always, also," Ohkura affectionately murmurs.
"You're welcome," Ryo groans.
"And thanks for repairing the washing machine so that I won't have to be awfully smelly," Ohkura goes on. "I'll make sure the aircon stops working soon, though, so that I'll be needing to call for more special assistance straight away."
Ryo chuckles.
"Fifteen days to go before I can pull your mask down, as soon as I'll be seeing you," he reminds them.
"You know, it was hard to see you wear it while you were here..." Ohkura tells him. "It felt like you were so distant."
"I know."
"I don't want you to be, anymore."
"Me neither. But maybe we had to break down as well like before, in order to start again from scratch," Ryo reflects.
"TORN is indeed forever, ne?" Ohkura suggests, for "we can't get closer than this, me and you."
"Man, bless you and your wicked ideas, back then," Ryo admits, ruffling his hair with one hand.
"It was yours, actually. I only polished your dirty thoughts."
"Oh, really?"
"Please video call me again tomorrow, okay? I'll put you to bed with some good bed time story in exchange for some other good hotness of yours."
"Is this a blackmail?"
"Always, Ryochan."
Ohkura offers him a flying kiss, Ryo returns the favour with an excessively languid wink. They both crack up, afterwards.
Both helplessly in love, despite all odds.
**
Notes: The title refers to the electric appliances breaking down at Ohkura's place lately during the self-isolating period (see his Kurasumasu May posts).
At the same time, it's a pun to the song TORN, of course ;)
Author: lalois
Fandom: Kanjani8
Pairings: RyOhkura
Rating: R
Length: one-shot
Words: 3180
Genre: fluff, ust, smut, established relationship, long-distance relationship, social distancing, friendship
Disclaimer: sadly I don’t own anything about Kanjani8, just my worship for my OTP. They don't belong to me, but they belong to each other.
Prompt/Summary/Background: Ohkura’s washing machine and wifi have broken down. Ryo has a reputation for being an excellent repairman. Japan is in lockdown, and TORN’s relationship has been awkward way before the pandemic. Inspired by Ohkura's Kurasumasu May posts.
Written on: 16th May 2020.
Also available @ Ao3, LJ, DW
14th May 2020
He's tried his best, but he has to admit he's a total failure when it comes to technical issues, so it's no wonder that the glue he's put on his poor broken washing machine keeps peeling down and does not help at all.
Ohkura sighs.
He does not want to do what he's about to do, but he's got no other choice. The customer service office just kept repeating him that during the lockdown, none of them will be providing home assistance, and the tips they suggested during the phone call, for a hand-made repair, are as useful as the useless glue.
But with work slowly needing him to go to the Jimusho offices, there is no way he's willing to show up there with dirty clothes, and waiting for hours outside a laundry station is out of question, either.
So it's with complicated feelings and regret that he's dialling a shortcut he's not called for long, maybe too long, and when Ryo replies, in a surprised voice, he cannot help but jolt.
"Hi, Ryochan... I... I hope you're fine, first of all. Are you okay?"
“I am, thank you. How about you, Ohkura?”
"I'm sorry I called, actually, but I thought... well, maybe it's just a bother..."
“Are you alright, Ohkura? “ Ryo asks, sounding worried.
"I'm fine. But my washing machine isn't. It broke down a few days ago, I tried to fix it myself but it didn't work and I don't know what else to do, since assistance isn't going to help either this time... May I ask for you help? Am I a bother?"
“You'll never be, Ohkura... c'mon,” Ryo replies, sounding half-amused. “I'll hang up and video call you, okay? So that you can show me the machine and it'll help finding out the problem, I hope.”
Ohkura does as asked, and he carefully follows Ryo's instructions to operate as he suggests, in order to try to repair the broken appliance. But after a long while the washing machine does not seem willing to start again any soon, and the drummer groans, covered in sweat.
"I'm sorry it didn't work," Ryo apologizes.
"No, no, please... I'm sorry I called, Ryochan," he retorts as soon as he can retrieve his mobile with his hands. "I didn't have to bother you in the first place, it's just that-"
"That you panic, right? Whenever your beloved washing machine is not by your side as it should, you start panicking unconsciously," Ryo completes for him.
"Uhm... yeah. I guess."
"I'll make sure I can find a proper technician who can come, okay? Please leave it to me."
"You needn't, Ryochan, pleas-"
"Please, Ohkura," Ryo cuts him off. "Please allow me to do at least this, for you. Please."
There's more than just a washing machine in Ryo's words, and they both know that; so Ohkura agrees, and says bye with a proper thanks and a warmer heart, when he hangs up.
17th May 2020
When three days later his doorbell rings, he doesn't expect the technician to show up this soon.
And it's not him, actually. There's no other than Ryo himself on the threshold of his apartment, wearing a baseball cap and a surgery mask and carrying a tool box in his right hand.
"Hi," the shy guys says. "May I check the naughty machine?"
Ohkura is still frozen solid and speechless on the threshold. They haven't seen each other since that fateful day of eight months before, nor kept in touch. It's been all too frenzy and too complicated for both of them, unconsciously deciding to postpone any debate to a more proper quiet moment in the future; but even when the whole world stopped down, a proper talk has not come. Last thing Ohkura expected, even after his unfortunate call, was to see the object of his lingering depression stand right before him now, right when a lockdown is going on and people are expected not to move from home unless it's very, very and again important.
"You were right, no one is willing to come as of now," Ryo explains. "But I just couldn't let it go, okay? I owe you."
Ohkura blinks, checking from the tool box to Ryo's worried eyes.
"Is it okay if I come in, Ohkura, or would you prefer me not to?" Ryo tentatively says. "I'd understand, of course, I can turn on my heels and-"
"I don't want you to go away," Ohkura confesses all at once. He feels like he should say an avalanche of other important things but he manages to handle none, while he lets Ryo in and he watches him put plastic gloves on and make his way towards the place where his washing machine is located; as if it was Ryo's own place, the one he's easily juggling in.
Ohkura retrieves his own cotton washable mask and wears it, before following Ryo at distance until in front of the washing machine; he watches Ryo peer into the appliance as if the metallic object was guarding a mystery.
"… Seems like I have to disassemble a few pieces... is it okay for you?" he asks, looking up at the drummer and furrowing deeply.
Ohkura shrugs.
"Please have fun. I thought I could learn something useful just by watching you doing this, but it does honestly seem still an obscure universe to me."
Ryo giggles softly.
"You said the same about the guitar and the piano back then, and look where you are now: skillfully using or learning them," he reminds him, much to Ohkura's soft pout.
"Might as well be, but facts are that your hands are capable of doing everything, unlike mine."
"I wouldn't say so," Ryo retorts.
"Mh. Call me when you'll be tired of having a fight with the damn appliance, then. I'll come and rescue you," Ohkura waves at him, leaving him alone.
About an hour and a half later, Ryo shows up in the kitchen where Ohkura is preparing lunch for both, wearing disposable plastic gloves.
"Oi," the drummer welcomes him, looking up from the stove, "you look as disheveled as after some good... nothing, sorry," he trails off, biting his lip. "Aren't you thirsty, Ryochan?" he asks him, offering him quickly some fresh water.
"Aaaaaaaaahhh," Ryo rejoices after gulping it down. "Hey, Ohkura, I'm the winner, you know?" he proudly announces, grinning. "Your washing machine has come back to life."
"Eh? Really?!"
"Yeah, of course. But I guess you mentioned in your posts that your wifi has also broken down, isn't that so?"
"Are you by any chance reading-"
"Where's the wifi router, Ohkura?"
The drummer narrows his eyes. He'd love to know more, whether Ryo is curious about him enough to read his posts through a secret Jimusho account, or if he just scrolls down certain tweets from his SNS official profile. Either way it's too damn tempting for him and too dangerous to ask, at the same time, for Ryo looks as hermetic as usual.
In a matter of time Ryo is done with the capricious wifi as well, much to Ohkura's open bewilderment.
"How did you even make it?" He babbles, checking on his iPad how everything is back to normality, in fact. Like a magic taking place thanks to a former nerdy idol miraculously popping up at his place.
"I'm... moved," Ohkura murmurs, looking up from his electronic device to Ryo, who is beaming at him even through the surgery mask.
"It's nothing, really."
"No, no... Please send me the invoice."
"You wish, Ohkura. Birthday treat."
"It was yesterday, actually," the drummer retorts, cocking his head to one side. "Thanks for your message, by the way. I really appreciated it."
"I thought... I thought about showing up here yesterday, actually," Ryo confesses, avoiding the drummer's eyes, "but it would have been honestly quite embarrassing to come on your birthday exactly, even if in the end it's very embarrassing anyway..." he looks up, meeting Ohkura's soft gaze.
They stare at each other for long, without a word, before Ohkura breaks eye contact and trots towards the kitchen. When he comes back, it's with a bag filled with a few Termobox containers.
"Here," he explains, offering it to Ryo. "I knew you'd refuse any compensation, that's why I made yakisoba and your favourite salad for you. We cannot eat that together as of now due to social distancing rules, but I thought you'd have maybe appreciated it later. I cooked everything using gloves and masks, so I made sure you don't have to worry about infection. Also, it should stay warm enough until your place, should you wish to eat it immediately."
"Talking about hands which can do nothing, ne?" Ryo objects in a thick voice, while accepting the bag.
Their fingers accidentally touch when Ohkura entrusts Ryo with the precious bento, but the taller guy does nothing to loosen the grip, even when the handles of the bag are safely into Ryo's hands.
"I... I need to get going," Ryo tentatively croaks.
"Sure. Sorry," Ohkura replies, stepping suddenly backwards.
Ryo turns on his heels, facing the door, then turns again.
"See you, then," he murmurs, however knowing that there probably won't be an 'again' for them, and Ohkura equally knows that. And then it's suddenly the drummer's masked mouth pressed against his own one, and the grip of his own fingers around the toolbox and the bag is released at once and both items fall beside him with a loud thump.
It's not really a kiss like this, there's no taste involved and no passion can be evoked and still, Ohkura can feel the lingering smell of Ryo's cigarettes and the latter is invaded by the drummer's familiar fragrance.
Ryo's gloved hands automatically close around Ohkura's back and neck and he pulls him towards him, hugging him tight, more than he should and definitely not like he's supposed to do, under the actual circumstances and the previous ones.
Abstinence and deprivation have started long before the lockdown for the two of them, and the sudden realization hurts both.
Ohkura pulls back from him, looking at fault, even when Ryo's apologetic smile tries to reassure him that nothing is so wrong. Ryo's gloved fingers intentionally search for Ohkura's equally covered ones, as they softly lock gazes again, and the warm contact of fingers intertwining despite the plastic separating them feels like unexpected heaven already.
"I should really get going, now," Ryo fumbles a second time. Ohkura's eyes laugh, apologizing already.
"I'll be keeping my paws to myself, this time," he assures Ryo, much to the latter's soft giggle. "... I'm sorry, Ryochan."
"Don't be, because I am not," Ryo replies, furrowing deeply, leaning to retrieve the two boxes again.
"Then... thank you. A lot," Ohkura hopefully murmurs, waving at him. He's glad the mask does not allow Ryo to see he's faintly blushing. 35 years old and still blushing in front of another man, like the open fan boy he's never stopped being.
"Anytime," Ryo says, looking fairly embarrassed before letting the door close behind him.
It's still echoing loudly in Ohkura's ears, the heartbeat that has not stopped being crazy ever since his crazy doings.
He wished himself a good year after his birthday, and he has to admit it's not been a bad start as of now. Definitely not.
**
Thirty minutes have not passed yet since Ryo left, but there's an incoming video call from him on Ohkura's mobile, and the latter quickly replies, wondering if there's anything wrong with him.
"Moshi-Moshi?"
"Hey," Ryo replies, looking a bit upset.
"Are you okay? Uhm, did you maybe forget something at my place, Ryochan?" Ohkura asks frowning.
"Yes. No. Probably," Ryo impatiently says. "Would you find me creepy if I were to tell you I wanna make love to you right now?"
For a long moment, Ohkura cannot speak, and all he can think about are the hours spent in front of the TV bawling like a helpless child watching and re-watching non-stop the NOMAD Live tour DVD and the hotness and temptation that Ryo is even through a screen, and all the times he's finished himself off just like that. Like an idiot.
"I'm just an idiot thinking like this, right?" Ryo sighs, involuntarily echoing the disclosed chaos in Ohkura's mind.
"No. I mean, if you are, than I am, as well," he stumbles on his words, biting his lip.
There's no incoming reply from Ryo, but the drummer knows it's not needed. Not when a breach has been opened and they're both jumping in.
"I wanted to kiss you without the damn mask," Ryo confesses.
"I wanted you to stay," Ohkura mirrors him.
Neither of them asks 'then why?', because both guys already know the answer. 'I wanna protect you', each of them could reply through the lyrics that Ohkura has once put in a old beloved song.
He swiftly slips off his hoodie once he reaches his bedroom, allowing Ryo to see everything through the mobile he's thrown right on the middle of the mattress, climbing the bed on his knees before sitting on his heels, right before the mobile.
Ryo must have a nice sight of his crotch, unconsciously towering on the camera, but he does not flinch.
"I want you naked," Ohkura commands, not caring if he's acting too bitchy, too suddenly, too greedy. He's been patient and understanding and even compliant for long, probably too long, and it's not without satisfaction that he can see Ryo obeying to his request, stripping off slowly for him only. But then, it's a focus on Ryo's mouth the only thing Ohkura can see, from the thin moustache above to the alluring lips conjuring another request.
"I'm into your pants, babe," Ryo murmurs softly, "and I am stroking you hard, like you like it best. C'mon, show me. Show me."
Ohkura takes his mobile in one hand and slips the other one into his hot pants. He closes his eyes, showing Ryo his face in awe while he allows himself to deal with the pleasure he's felt guilty towards for the last eight months.
"Ryochan...," he cries softly, ashamed of what he's going to ask next. "Ryochan, during this time, have you ever-"
"No, Ohkura," Ryo cuts him off, hissing almost. "Never."
"How about that Osakan comedia-"
"I thought we were more than just a bunch of shitty rumours, Tatsu," Ryo hisses, sounding suddenly tired and hurt.
"And I thought it would hurt less than this, having you so far away," Ohkura replies, wiping a tear away. "I'm sorry I'm this weak. I'm sorry I miss you this much. I'm sorry I'm coming on this relief alone, Ryochan," he admits hiccupping, right before a strangled moan fills the room and the video call as well.
"... I'm a mess now, literally and not," the drummer whispers then, when he retrieves the mobile and Ryo can see how red his cheeks are, how thick the wave of pleasure has clouded his eyes.
"You're as amazing as usual," Ryo sweetly tells him, unavoidable and unmistakable pride clear in his voice. "You know, I've been masturbating thoroughly all this time... better than nothing, I thought. But when I smelled your scent before, and it filled my nostrils when we kissed and hugged... it honestly became too much, I guess. You're so real and alive that the realization almost scared me."
"I want your cock, Ryochan," the drummer retorts, still panting hard. Through the mobile, he shows Ryo how he gets rid of his pants and wet underwear, framing the curve of his ass only next, from behind. "I want you here, Ryochan, filling me hard."
"Me too...," Ryo confesses in a hoarse voice. They both leave it to their own fingers then, howling when the vocal teasing finally helps reaching the craved completion, murmuring each other's name until it hurts the soul, more than the spent bodies.
"I probably never told you before, but I wanna dig my fingers in your hair, Ryochan," Ohkura tweets after a while, when they're both lying on one side in bed, both caressing the small corners of the mobile screen, trying to reach the other as if each were just behind a mirror. "I'd love you to caress me like you did to your guitars and microphone, during your live tour. They sounded so beautiful. So very much loved and cared for."
"Because you were there with me, Ohkura," Ryo tells him, propping himself on one elbow. "The truth is, wherever I go and whatever I do, you're still with me always. In the songs I play and in the ones I don't, because of reasons. I can feel it so much that sometimes I do even wonder whether I'm not disturbing you in your sleep like a wicked nightmare sucking up your soul or something like that."
"So I was not... imagining things," Ohkura timidly tries.
"Have you ever, honestly?"
The drummer cracks up softly, making Ryo open up in a gorgeous beaming smile.
"By the way, your right nipple is as tempting as always," Ryo teases, noticing how the camera has slipped down focusing on a small part of Ohkura's bare chest rather than his face. "Can't wait to lick it soon."
The drummer starts twitching it between his fingertips, making sure the camera includes all the details of the rosy turgid skin.
"Don't make it harder than it already is!" Ryo whines, rubbing his own face with his fingers, out of sheer frustration.
“Your puns are always adorable, Ryochan.”
“That was not- aaaaargh, you idiot!!” Ryo howls.
"Thanks for making me feel I'm your fave bitch always, also," Ohkura affectionately murmurs.
"You're welcome," Ryo groans.
"And thanks for repairing the washing machine so that I won't have to be awfully smelly," Ohkura goes on. "I'll make sure the aircon stops working soon, though, so that I'll be needing to call for more special assistance straight away."
Ryo chuckles.
"Fifteen days to go before I can pull your mask down, as soon as I'll be seeing you," he reminds them.
"You know, it was hard to see you wear it while you were here..." Ohkura tells him. "It felt like you were so distant."
"I know."
"I don't want you to be, anymore."
"Me neither. But maybe we had to break down as well like before, in order to start again from scratch," Ryo reflects.
"TORN is indeed forever, ne?" Ohkura suggests, for "we can't get closer than this, me and you."
"Man, bless you and your wicked ideas, back then," Ryo admits, ruffling his hair with one hand.
"It was yours, actually. I only polished your dirty thoughts."
"Oh, really?"
"Please video call me again tomorrow, okay? I'll put you to bed with some good bed time story in exchange for some other good hotness of yours."
"Is this a blackmail?"
"Always, Ryochan."
Ohkura offers him a flying kiss, Ryo returns the favour with an excessively languid wink. They both crack up, afterwards.
Both helplessly in love, despite all odds.
**
Notes: The title refers to the electric appliances breaking down at Ohkura's place lately during the self-isolating period (see his Kurasumasu May posts).
At the same time, it's a pun to the song TORN, of course ;)