Flash Forward, I art annoyed.
Picture me with a small anime pulsing vein on my head.
That's about how I feel about Flash Forward right now.
So...
My mom read the blurb for tonight's episode from the newspaper TV schedule and I got really super exicted because it mentioned KEIKO. Who is on the search and looking for Bryce just like he was looking for her and should still be looking for instead of getting all cozy with Nicole.
My shipper's heart goes, "YAY!"
It is then promptly broken by the opening angsty flashback between Mark and Olivia, who have talk about family coming first and don't put yourself in danger and whatnot, yadda yadda fade in to the present and... Mark is moving out of the house. Temporarily sure, and he and Olivia are not actually divorcing or breaking-up or having any real drama about it but still... my inner thoughts steamed a bit.
I maintain what I said when I last gushed about Flash Forward:
NOT MY MARRIED COUPLE GUYS! YOU WILL NOT BREAK UP MY MARRIED COUPLE!
(As for my almost-married couple, Zoey did not make an appearance, so no Demetri/Zoey for me to squee over this time. Next week's previews promise a shotgun wedding in the style of the Numb3rs Charlie/Amita but it also teases that that might be the week Demetri dies so things do not look particularly good for them.)
Anyway, I'll break this down into the Main Plot and the Subplots for organization.
Main Plot - Mole in the FBI
Thanks again show, for reminding me about the creepy video from 1991 that had D. Gibbons addressing Demetri directly.
Mark and Demetri follow a lead only to find him dead. The mysterious mastermind that is D. Gibbons is a true chessmaster, covering all trace of his tracks since 1990. And he has help inside the bureau. Thus, Mark and CIA Agent Vogel take Mark's team aside and interrogate them one by one.
The mole turns out to be Marcie. As she's one of those tertiary characters and I hadn't really been paying much attention to Flash Forward back when she was important to the plot I kind of still have no idea who she is. But anyway, when they figure it out, she flips out and starts shooting up the whole dang FBI office. Even runs out and gets picked up by a guy on a getaway motorcycle. Janis is all awesome and stops her and they have a mini though deadly serious catfight in the front fountain. Marcie's caught and arrested... all that good stuff.
But lo! THINGS ARE NOT AS THEY SEEM! Which we learn while Janis and Simon are walking down in the garage and Simon is not-so-subtly coming on to her.
...
You know for a lesbian Janis seems to have an awfully abnormal amount of chemistry with straight males. (It's not just Simon, no, last week we had this semi-cute semi-REALLY AWKWARD AND GROSS conversation between her and Demetri when she was angsting about the baby she saw in her flash forward which she needed to concieve by that weekend to have the dates match up and Demetri helpfully offered to be sperm donor. HEARTWARMING AND ALL BUT I'M SORRY THAT'S KIND OF ICKY SHOW. NEVER EVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN.)
/tangent
Anyway, turns out she and Marcie are both moles. She tells Simon, "Message recieved." referring to his bumping off of Flasso in the premiere and then gives this creepy slasher smile and I am all O.O and HOLY SWEDISH MUFFINS I JUST REALIZED THE BRILLIANCE OF THE CHESS METAPHOR THEY USED IN THIS EPISODE. You see, it was a Queen's Sacrifice which means D. Gibbons sacrificed his best player, his "queen piece" Marcie, as part of his overall secret strategy to win the game. MY MIND, SHE HAS BEEN BLOWN.
But you're still not off the hook for what you did to me in the subplots show.
Subplots - "Security" Guy Follows Olivia and Charlie, Keiko Is Cute, and Bryce Does Stupid Things
I AM NOT BELIEVING THAT THE CREEPER WHO WAS FOLLOWING OLIVIA IS REALLY A SECURITY SENTRY SENT BY MARK. NOT FOR ONE MINUTE. Mark will hopefully be all, "Uh-oh." once he gets the voicemail message Olivia sent him.
Oh and Lloyd? I know you're busy trying to save the world and all and need more of the formula you wrote on the mirror in your flash forward to do so and Oliva might have more in her brain but she's kinda right, you have immensely bad timing in when you decided to ask.
Regarding Keiko, she continues to be utterly adorable and I love her. You go girl! Show those hard-edged mechanics working in the random lot what you know about cars and machinery! Be an awesome grease-covered wrench wench! The Hispanic car worker dude gets major points too for being all awesomely big-brotherish and protective towards Keiko when he brings her in to the shop to work, making the announcement up front to all the burly scary guys that Keiko is part of the family and you should not mess with her.
Unfortunately for Keiko, my ship, and my heart, the authorities come in and arrest the whole shop for having undocumented workers. Does this mean Keiko will be shipped back to Japan?! Oh NOOOOO!
On to the Bryce/Keiko! Or rather, The Horrendously Cruel Teasing Of Bryce/Keiko Shippers Whilst Introducing Love Triangle/Quadrangle Drama That I Do Not Appreciate.
You know that one annoying storytelling device that filmmakers and TV writers love to use? The one where the two people or parties are looking for each other and one person leaves this place which the other party happens to be in at a certain time and they just miss each other?
Yeah... Flash Forward pulled that one with Bryce/Keiko. Twice. In this episode alone, because they'd already done a couple in their first official episode "together".
May I scream in frustration for a minute?
AAAAARRRGGGGHHHH!
And that wasn't even the most frustrating part. Oh noooo not at all because Bryce continued to hang around Nicole the whole episode and be cute with her and in a moment of random stupidity, while they're standing outside the restaurant he's going to meet Keiko in and she's sitting in there right now with Hispanic Big Brother Guy he up and kisses Nicole.
My reaction was pretty patently WTFBBQ?!
Bryce and Keiko had enough great drama with the whole "I must find my Destined True Love" without adding a love triangle. WHY SHOW WHYYYYY? WHY MUST YOU CONTINUE TO VALIDATE BRYCE/NICOLE SHIPPERS WHILST CONSTANTLY GIVING US POOR BRYCE/KEIKO SHIPPERS CRUEL TEASES AND NEAR MISS MEETINGS?!
*sigh*
Okay okay, I'm calm now.
But seriously, as I shipper... I feel mistreated. Mark and Olivia seem on the verge of breaking up, Demetri and Zoey have that whole impending death thing hanging over them, and Bryce and Keiko get nowhere and nothing but near-misses and sudden random love triangle drama with Nicole, whom I refuse to hate because she is such awesome BFFs with Bryce. (I WILL NOT SUCCUMB TO DIE FOR OUR SHIP. I HEART NICOLE A LOT BUT SHE JUST CANNOT COMPETE WITH THE CUTE JAPANESE MECHANIC WHO IS EPICLY DESTINED TO MEET BRYCE AND FOR WHOM HE GAINED A NEW LEASE ON LIFE AND STARTED LEARNING JAPANESE AND DRAWING HER PICTURE IN SKETCHBOOKS.)
I am clinging to my cracky imaginary Simon/Janis for dear life because that's the only ship I have left that I know isn't going to disappoint me because it ain't happening anyway.
All my romantic woes aside, THE EPISODE WAS STILL AWESOME. I AM EAGERLY LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT WEEK, FOR WHICH I AM FERVENTLY HOPING THAT DEMETRI DOES NOT DIE.
Now that I'm done abusing my capslock, I'm heading over to FFnet for some fanfic. I am getting quite desperate for shippy bolsters of squee and heartwarming.
That's about how I feel about Flash Forward right now.
So...
My mom read the blurb for tonight's episode from the newspaper TV schedule and I got really super exicted because it mentioned KEIKO. Who is on the search and looking for Bryce just like he was looking for her and should still be looking for instead of getting all cozy with Nicole.
My shipper's heart goes, "YAY!"
It is then promptly broken by the opening angsty flashback between Mark and Olivia, who have talk about family coming first and don't put yourself in danger and whatnot, yadda yadda fade in to the present and... Mark is moving out of the house. Temporarily sure, and he and Olivia are not actually divorcing or breaking-up or having any real drama about it but still... my inner thoughts steamed a bit.
I maintain what I said when I last gushed about Flash Forward:
NOT MY MARRIED COUPLE GUYS! YOU WILL NOT BREAK UP MY MARRIED COUPLE!
(As for my almost-married couple, Zoey did not make an appearance, so no Demetri/Zoey for me to squee over this time. Next week's previews promise a shotgun wedding in the style of the Numb3rs Charlie/Amita but it also teases that that might be the week Demetri dies so things do not look particularly good for them.)
Anyway, I'll break this down into the Main Plot and the Subplots for organization.
Main Plot - Mole in the FBI
Thanks again show, for reminding me about the creepy video from 1991 that had D. Gibbons addressing Demetri directly.
Mark and Demetri follow a lead only to find him dead. The mysterious mastermind that is D. Gibbons is a true chessmaster, covering all trace of his tracks since 1990. And he has help inside the bureau. Thus, Mark and CIA Agent Vogel take Mark's team aside and interrogate them one by one.
The mole turns out to be Marcie. As she's one of those tertiary characters and I hadn't really been paying much attention to Flash Forward back when she was important to the plot I kind of still have no idea who she is. But anyway, when they figure it out, she flips out and starts shooting up the whole dang FBI office. Even runs out and gets picked up by a guy on a getaway motorcycle. Janis is all awesome and stops her and they have a mini though deadly serious catfight in the front fountain. Marcie's caught and arrested... all that good stuff.
But lo! THINGS ARE NOT AS THEY SEEM! Which we learn while Janis and Simon are walking down in the garage and Simon is not-so-subtly coming on to her.
...
You know for a lesbian Janis seems to have an awfully abnormal amount of chemistry with straight males. (It's not just Simon, no, last week we had this semi-cute semi-REALLY AWKWARD AND GROSS conversation between her and Demetri when she was angsting about the baby she saw in her flash forward which she needed to concieve by that weekend to have the dates match up and Demetri helpfully offered to be sperm donor. HEARTWARMING AND ALL BUT I'M SORRY THAT'S KIND OF ICKY SHOW. NEVER EVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN.)
/tangent
Anyway, turns out she and Marcie are both moles. She tells Simon, "Message recieved." referring to his bumping off of Flasso in the premiere and then gives this creepy slasher smile and I am all O.O and HOLY SWEDISH MUFFINS I JUST REALIZED THE BRILLIANCE OF THE CHESS METAPHOR THEY USED IN THIS EPISODE. You see, it was a Queen's Sacrifice which means D. Gibbons sacrificed his best player, his "queen piece" Marcie, as part of his overall secret strategy to win the game. MY MIND, SHE HAS BEEN BLOWN.
But you're still not off the hook for what you did to me in the subplots show.
Subplots - "Security" Guy Follows Olivia and Charlie, Keiko Is Cute, and Bryce Does Stupid Things
I AM NOT BELIEVING THAT THE CREEPER WHO WAS FOLLOWING OLIVIA IS REALLY A SECURITY SENTRY SENT BY MARK. NOT FOR ONE MINUTE. Mark will hopefully be all, "Uh-oh." once he gets the voicemail message Olivia sent him.
Oh and Lloyd? I know you're busy trying to save the world and all and need more of the formula you wrote on the mirror in your flash forward to do so and Oliva might have more in her brain but she's kinda right, you have immensely bad timing in when you decided to ask.
Regarding Keiko, she continues to be utterly adorable and I love her. You go girl! Show those hard-edged mechanics working in the random lot what you know about cars and machinery! Be an awesome grease-covered wrench wench! The Hispanic car worker dude gets major points too for being all awesomely big-brotherish and protective towards Keiko when he brings her in to the shop to work, making the announcement up front to all the burly scary guys that Keiko is part of the family and you should not mess with her.
Unfortunately for Keiko, my ship, and my heart, the authorities come in and arrest the whole shop for having undocumented workers. Does this mean Keiko will be shipped back to Japan?! Oh NOOOOO!
On to the Bryce/Keiko! Or rather, The Horrendously Cruel Teasing Of Bryce/Keiko Shippers Whilst Introducing Love Triangle/Quadrangle Drama That I Do Not Appreciate.
You know that one annoying storytelling device that filmmakers and TV writers love to use? The one where the two people or parties are looking for each other and one person leaves this place which the other party happens to be in at a certain time and they just miss each other?
Yeah... Flash Forward pulled that one with Bryce/Keiko. Twice. In this episode alone, because they'd already done a couple in their first official episode "together".
May I scream in frustration for a minute?
AAAAARRRGGGGHHHH!
And that wasn't even the most frustrating part. Oh noooo not at all because Bryce continued to hang around Nicole the whole episode and be cute with her and in a moment of random stupidity, while they're standing outside the restaurant he's going to meet Keiko in and she's sitting in there right now with Hispanic Big Brother Guy he up and kisses Nicole.
My reaction was pretty patently WTFBBQ?!
Bryce and Keiko had enough great drama with the whole "I must find my Destined True Love" without adding a love triangle. WHY SHOW WHYYYYY? WHY MUST YOU CONTINUE TO VALIDATE BRYCE/NICOLE SHIPPERS WHILST CONSTANTLY GIVING US POOR BRYCE/KEIKO SHIPPERS CRUEL TEASES AND NEAR MISS MEETINGS?!
*sigh*
Okay okay, I'm calm now.
But seriously, as I shipper... I feel mistreated. Mark and Olivia seem on the verge of breaking up, Demetri and Zoey have that whole impending death thing hanging over them, and Bryce and Keiko get nowhere and nothing but near-misses and sudden random love triangle drama with Nicole, whom I refuse to hate because she is such awesome BFFs with Bryce. (I WILL NOT SUCCUMB TO DIE FOR OUR SHIP. I HEART NICOLE A LOT BUT SHE JUST CANNOT COMPETE WITH THE CUTE JAPANESE MECHANIC WHO IS EPICLY DESTINED TO MEET BRYCE AND FOR WHOM HE GAINED A NEW LEASE ON LIFE AND STARTED LEARNING JAPANESE AND DRAWING HER PICTURE IN SKETCHBOOKS.)
I am clinging to my cracky imaginary Simon/Janis for dear life because that's the only ship I have left that I know isn't going to disappoint me because it ain't happening anyway.
All my romantic woes aside, THE EPISODE WAS STILL AWESOME. I AM EAGERLY LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT WEEK, FOR WHICH I AM FERVENTLY HOPING THAT DEMETRI DOES NOT DIE.
Now that I'm done abusing my capslock, I'm heading over to FFnet for some fanfic. I am getting quite desperate for shippy bolsters of squee and heartwarming.