things and such.
i still fucking miss him.
this is so absurd.
actually maybe its perfect. it'll keep my mind occupied so i dont do anything stupid at dickens. not like i do anymore. i just need to focus on something.
also: looking at what i have to do by the end of the semester scares the shit out of me. no freaking joke. and alot of its open ended. lets see...
Hum 303: 10 page paper on... something that connects to what we studied. um... ok.. and a test.
CWL: just another exam. which means i have to read a shitload.
SCI: a 3 page paper comparing the science in erin brokivish to the real thing and a test.
Jour: a big group paper critiquing a news website.
REC: a 10 page paper on..... some issue pro/con that has leasure... um...and i think a test.
Hum 407: a huge project comparing dangerous beauty to the real thing and an essay exam.
and theres 3 weeks to do this.
seriously just shoot me.
theres a part of me that... its just... remembering that night on the phone... or the way he looked when he slept. or at sparkies. or... the way he looked at me in the car.
but at the same time, and its so stupid, a part of me wants to get mad. i think thats just what im used to doing when things get bad. i get angry because they left me. maybe it had been a while since some one from far away managed to do that. i just remember seeing the way this guy was looking at a girl at popscene. and that was the way flapo and chicago looked at me. and damnit. i liked it.
rawr. when the hell am i going to grow up and start behaiving normally.
and im having zero luck on the house hunt. its frustrating. i mean, i know i have a place to go, if i give my months notice and dont have a place to go. but still it would be really nice.
and its dickens tomorrow. and the metro show. and i dont have bloomers. and i have no clue what im going to wear tomorrow. stupid. stupid. stupid. however. i did write some lryics. but i hit a wall so their not finished... but i think i like what i have. i think.
and im reading high fidelity again.
and i want to go somewhere. ive been here too long. maybe i'll do a ucsb trip. or... nyc... or chicago....
this is so absurd.
actually maybe its perfect. it'll keep my mind occupied so i dont do anything stupid at dickens. not like i do anymore. i just need to focus on something.
also: looking at what i have to do by the end of the semester scares the shit out of me. no freaking joke. and alot of its open ended. lets see...
Hum 303: 10 page paper on... something that connects to what we studied. um... ok.. and a test.
CWL: just another exam. which means i have to read a shitload.
SCI: a 3 page paper comparing the science in erin brokivish to the real thing and a test.
Jour: a big group paper critiquing a news website.
REC: a 10 page paper on..... some issue pro/con that has leasure... um...and i think a test.
Hum 407: a huge project comparing dangerous beauty to the real thing and an essay exam.
and theres 3 weeks to do this.
seriously just shoot me.
theres a part of me that... its just... remembering that night on the phone... or the way he looked when he slept. or at sparkies. or... the way he looked at me in the car.
but at the same time, and its so stupid, a part of me wants to get mad. i think thats just what im used to doing when things get bad. i get angry because they left me. maybe it had been a while since some one from far away managed to do that. i just remember seeing the way this guy was looking at a girl at popscene. and that was the way flapo and chicago looked at me. and damnit. i liked it.
rawr. when the hell am i going to grow up and start behaiving normally.
and im having zero luck on the house hunt. its frustrating. i mean, i know i have a place to go, if i give my months notice and dont have a place to go. but still it would be really nice.
and its dickens tomorrow. and the metro show. and i dont have bloomers. and i have no clue what im going to wear tomorrow. stupid. stupid. stupid. however. i did write some lryics. but i hit a wall so their not finished... but i think i like what i have. i think.
and im reading high fidelity again.
and i want to go somewhere. ive been here too long. maybe i'll do a ucsb trip. or... nyc... or chicago....