Resenting my mother
I am so frustrated and angry and resentful toward my mother right now. I know I shouldn't be but I am. I feel very petty feeling like this but I can't help it. I almost wish it had been a closed adoption so my mother wouldn't be able to know her. I want a relationship, not her. It's not fair that she can just pop in whenever she likes. I can't go to NY every month or 2. It's not fair. She has had dinner with her twice. And has already made plans to next month too. It's just not fair! I wish I could control it. I just wish I could make her stop seeing her. I want to meet her. I guess I should have made the arrangements with Ed and Janet, that is what she is doing. I really want the contact to be up to her, not forced. I wish I could say something to mom to make her not contact Monica again. I know it's petty and childish but she is my daughter and my mother just sticks her nose into everything I just wish she would butt OUT! Let us connect. Now even that piece of shit of a sperm donor father of mine has met her. I hate my parents. That is something that at 40 I should have outgrown right?