mother-in-laws
Love the subject of mother in laws. Did I mention I love my therapist??? I do, she is a god send. She has helped me so much to deal with people in my life that I would otherwise let run all over me. I can tell now that people are stunned when they realize that they can no longer run me down. It's like they've hit a wall, and they just don't know how to get around it. I always hate it when people say things like,'in this world, it is survival of the fittest', but quite often people use others this way. People make a point of finding your weakness, and once they do, they POUNCE! I feel stronger in such a way that I am more confident in my abilities to take on the challenges of being a new mother. 6 months ago, I was not. I was quite scared, and willing to let others control my emotions like a puppet with all their horror stories and fascinating wives' tales. My m-i-l came over last nite to convince me how horrible it is to get an epidural, and 'you'll have a headache for days and days afterwards', or 'you won't have the experience of feeling the baby come out'... uh, isn't that kind of the point??? I should hope so!!! Geez. She tried to put some other fears into me, but those doors are shut. No fear allowed. I'm sure her next tactic is to try to get into the delivery room with us, but GROSS!!!!!!!!! I don't think so. I am so proud of us... we have managed to build a support system around us that does not depend on her for approval... this is a major accomplishment for us. It is nice to know others are willing to be your family when your real family has so many conditions to which you must abide by in order to be included. Please spare the world of more conditions.... just because your parents treated you like crap, doesn't mean you gotta share the crap. Be the example for others, and show them the love you never got. That's what my dad did for me. And I am so grateful to him. I miss him so much. He would get a total kick out of having a grandson. He would be so stoked! Anyway, I'm still trying to make this family situation work, and in order to do that I must be willing to accept people for who they are... and know they will not change. My therapist told me a great story about the Scorpion and the Frog. I'll share it sometime.