(no subject)
So it's Saturday night and I'm staying in. I haven't had a good nights sleep in a few weeks now. This whole waking up at 7am shit has got to stop. But the dreams are back and I hate sleeping now. So what have I been doing?
Well, The band is going well. We've had 3 full practices and finished 2.5 songs. At this rate we'll be able to start playing shows sometime in late Jan, early Feb. So that's awesome. And the music kicks ass. I think we're gonna give Killroy a run for their money.
Been kinda down lately. I need someone to talk to. I can only drink and pass out so much. It's killing me. Ever get the feeling you wish you could just flip a switch and not care about certain things for a while? Till shit works itself out? That's what I feel like. The guys are great for hanging out with and shooting the shit but the only outlet I have anymore is my music. And I only get to do that 1 or 2 times a week. Total suck.
I miss feeling like someone depends on me. Not for anything in particular. I've got a lot to offer but noone to give to. I guess I've just spent so much time in my life giving and giving and giving that when there's noone there I feel like something's missing. So I give to myself. And I feel bad because I know I don't need all these things that I buy (ipod, computer, stereo, effects pedals, expensive lunches, clothes, movies, books, etc) and I feel like shit afterwards cause I know I don't NEED any of it. It's kinda fucked up. I'd just like to know I'm missed. Is that wierd? Probably not.
Maybe when we set up the mic and I can scream a bit at the next practice I'll feel better.
God, I need a drink.
Well, The band is going well. We've had 3 full practices and finished 2.5 songs. At this rate we'll be able to start playing shows sometime in late Jan, early Feb. So that's awesome. And the music kicks ass. I think we're gonna give Killroy a run for their money.
Been kinda down lately. I need someone to talk to. I can only drink and pass out so much. It's killing me. Ever get the feeling you wish you could just flip a switch and not care about certain things for a while? Till shit works itself out? That's what I feel like. The guys are great for hanging out with and shooting the shit but the only outlet I have anymore is my music. And I only get to do that 1 or 2 times a week. Total suck.
I miss feeling like someone depends on me. Not for anything in particular. I've got a lot to offer but noone to give to. I guess I've just spent so much time in my life giving and giving and giving that when there's noone there I feel like something's missing. So I give to myself. And I feel bad because I know I don't need all these things that I buy (ipod, computer, stereo, effects pedals, expensive lunches, clothes, movies, books, etc) and I feel like shit afterwards cause I know I don't NEED any of it. It's kinda fucked up. I'd just like to know I'm missed. Is that wierd? Probably not.
Maybe when we set up the mic and I can scream a bit at the next practice I'll feel better.
God, I need a drink.