Oh, much meta
What to say, what to say....
- This season's Doctor Who has been my favourite since season 5, possibly best New Who season ever? This hurts me, as I love Martha Jones so very much (you think you're no longer a fangirl, and then you see an audiobook starring Freema Ageyman and Andrew Scott and you lose your shit completely). I've loved it enough to really engage with the series, hunt down as much comment and meta as I can. The Verity podcast has been excellent for this, even when I disagree, and LJ has really stepped in on this too - just read this meta on Death in Heaven http://elisi.livejournal.com/878404.html and this bit on Clara here (my feels on Clara have truly transformed over three seasons). I think it helped keep me alive. If anyone reads this and knows where the good sh*t (meta) is, please link me!
- I was living my life as normal - doing curating stuff on the side, going to all the cultural things I can find (theatre, art, performance, films, food), crisis rising up and up until I became dangerously suicidal and well... the NHS is now focussing on me to make sure I stay alive. It's meant three weeks sick leave, daily home visits and a possibility of mood stabilisers. I'm feeling a lot more saner now, but it seems in exchange for valuing my life more I'm only able to do a lot less, at home and at work. I'm trying to not let it make me feel defective. And I doubt my short term contract work will survive, even they are genuinely nice and supportive and a really nice (underpaid) place to work, letting me cut my hours and go home if I feel bad. And going back to temping means more money but I'm still not well and I don't know how that's going to pan out. Unless I go back to doing the festival for the BFI again, even though it has made me suicidal both years. It sounds stupid following that sentence but I do love it - it shows off so much of the best of me, and I get scared that if I don't do it I end up being left behind in my chosen career.
- I'm still trying to write every day.