Single
Frankie broke up w/ me last night. I'm doing well for this and I do believe it is for the better. I still love him even if I may just be using him as an emotional crutch. I just really admire the person he is. It hurts a lot sometimes. However, nothing could be quite as painful as my first broken heart.
I learned a lot of things again. I learned about myself. Among these things is I know not to validate myself through a relationship. I know I need to focus on me more and start thinking about myself constantly instead of romantic thoughts of my significant other.
Well...I guess cuz I'm emotinoally drained and tired...the hurt is still kinda fresh...I just don't want to think too much about this.
I know not to surpress and hold in my emotions. I know not to go overboard w/ the crying.
I know I need to be strong.
On other news, I went to the OC Fair and it wasn't anything super special. I ate and ate all the yummy YUMMY food. It was great. I also did a lot of other things...oh yeah...I went to HB beach for the day w/ everybody and we drank beet juice and went to Farmer's market. Great day. I think I'm getting a job at Payless shoestore cuz Cristina has the hookups and their desperate for people. I work for my dad a lot and it was a good way to get over a hang over but now I fear I dwell on things.
I found out I fear the future or find that there is no point to it sometimes. This is where I fear I think I need Frankie sometimes. But it's ok. I'm strong. I love his strong mentality. We're friends. He can still help me.
Daniel says I easily give my heart away because I use other people as crutches. I still find it hard to like myself and depend on myself. It just feels very lonely. Lonely. But then my friends said that this is what they're here for. I am not alone.
I learned a lot of things again. I learned about myself. Among these things is I know not to validate myself through a relationship. I know I need to focus on me more and start thinking about myself constantly instead of romantic thoughts of my significant other.
Well...I guess cuz I'm emotinoally drained and tired...the hurt is still kinda fresh...I just don't want to think too much about this.
I know not to surpress and hold in my emotions. I know not to go overboard w/ the crying.
I know I need to be strong.
On other news, I went to the OC Fair and it wasn't anything super special. I ate and ate all the yummy YUMMY food. It was great. I also did a lot of other things...oh yeah...I went to HB beach for the day w/ everybody and we drank beet juice and went to Farmer's market. Great day. I think I'm getting a job at Payless shoestore cuz Cristina has the hookups and their desperate for people. I work for my dad a lot and it was a good way to get over a hang over but now I fear I dwell on things.
I found out I fear the future or find that there is no point to it sometimes. This is where I fear I think I need Frankie sometimes. But it's ok. I'm strong. I love his strong mentality. We're friends. He can still help me.
Daniel says I easily give my heart away because I use other people as crutches. I still find it hard to like myself and depend on myself. It just feels very lonely. Lonely. But then my friends said that this is what they're here for. I am not alone.