BSG fic - Starting Over 10 / ?
Chapter Ten
Lee stumbled wearily into the pilots’ bunkroom, and was relieved to find it empty. He’d just flown his first CAP as a fully-fledged pilot, and it had been more tiring than he expected, particularly following on from a long maintenance shift. All he wanted was some quiet and a chance to sleep. He sat down on the edge of his bunk and slowly began to unlace his boots, yawning widely.
“Tired, Apollo? I thought gods were inexhaustible.”
Correction - the bunkroom was nearly empty. Lee looked up, scowling, to find Kara grinning down at him from the top bunk opposite.
“Stop calling me that.”
Kara’s eyes sparkled maliciously. “Aw, Lee, don’t you like your new name?”
“It’s not my name.” Lee finished unlacing his boots with a few angry jerks. “It’s a joke, and one I sincerely hope everyone forgets as soon as possible.”
“Too late for that. Once you’re gifted with a call-sign, you’re stuck with it for good. It’s tradition.”
Lee glared down at the deck. “Frak tradition.”
“You can frak it all you like, it won’t change anything,” Kara said briskly. “Come on Lee, it’s not so bad. Better than Hotdog.”
Lee scowled, pulling off his socks. In a way, he would have preferred Hotdog. Better than a callsign that had been given to him just for being William Adama’s son.
“Why are you so tired, anyway?” asked Kara. “Don’t tell me one little CAP wore you out.”
Lee looked up at her and glared. He could tell she was trying not to laugh underneath her bland expression.
“Why am I tired? Maybe because I spent three hours searching the maintenance lockers for a part that doesn’t frakking exist.”
Kara’s mouth trembled and the laughter burst out. Lee watched her unsmiling.
“Frak you.”
“Really, Apollo, that’s no way to talk to your superior officer.”
“Very well. Frak you, Captain Thrace, sir.”
Kara laughed again. “Well, maybe that will teach you not to steal all the pens for my whiteboard, Ensign Adama.”
Lee couldn’t help smiling at that memory. “You didn’t need them. I thought you did a great job demonstrating how to perform a Picon Arc through actions alone.”
Kara pulled a face. “I must have looked like a complete idiot.”
“I wouldn’t worry.” Lee grinned. “No-one would dare to say so to your face.”
“Bastard,” said Kara, but she grinned back. “And shut up. Some of us are trying to get some sleep.” She lay back down, smirking.
Lee stripped down to his tanks and boxers, and lay down on his rack with a sigh of relief…only to find his head hitting something cold and wet. He yelped in surprise and sat back up.
“What the hell…”
Kara peered over the edge of her bunk irritatedly. “What is it now?”
Lee grabbed his pillow and dropped it on the floor in disgust. “This is soaking. Gods know with what.” He looked up at Kara suspiciously.
She spread her hands innocently. “Nothing to do with me this time. I restrict our little game to working hours.”
True enough. “Sorry.” Lee sighed and lay back down. The mattress was hard and uncomfortable without a pillow. “Does everyone on this ship spend all their time playing practical jokes?”
“Hazard of being a nugget,” said Kara unsympathetically. “Hazing goes with the territory when you join a new crew.”
“I know,” said Lee with resignation. “And this is mild, compared to what I’ve seen on some freighters.”
“Why? What goes on?”
Lee opened his mouth to reply and caught his breath as a memory blindsided him. Harsh, jagged breaths echoing inside his helmet, his hands raw and aching from banging frantically on the locked hatch, the hollow panic in his chest as he watched his oxygen slowly drip away…
“Lee?”
He shook his head, pushing the memories fiercely away, annoyed that they were still so vivid. That was all over long ago, he should have forgotten all about it. It didn’t matter now, he wouldn’t let it.
He realised Kara was still waiting for an answer.
“Well, at least here there’s no physical injury involved,” he said finally. “Look Kara, I really need to get some sleep.” He closed his eyes.
“Fine. I wouldn’t like to disturb your divine rest.”
Lee mustered the energy to raise his hand and extend a finger.
He heard a smothered chuckle, and then something hit him in the chest. His eyes flew open to find a pillow lying on top of him.
He turned his head to look at Kara in surprise. “Thanks.”
“No need.” She grinned. “I’m tough enough to sleep without one.”
Lee chuckled and pulled his curtain shut.
----
Zak finished his shift in CIC and headed to his father’s quarters. Even though they were all on the same ship now, Bill had kept up his new custom of regular family dinners.
Zak knocked on the hatch without enthusiasm. He’d enjoyed the meals at first, but since Lee had joined the fleet, the conversation always seemed to be about flying - something Zak couldn’t join in.
He didn’t know why he was so sensitive about it. It wasn’t as though he’d ever had any great desire to fly, apart from the wish to please his father. When he’d failed to get into flight school, he’d never really felt he’d missed out on anything. But…
But it was one thing to have inadequacies. It was another to have them rubbed in your face.
He entered to find his father alone in his cabin, laying the table. Bill looked up and smiled at him.
“Good evening, Captain. Did you get the inquiry room set up for Sergeant Hadrian?”
Zak nodded. “All done. When is the President going public?”
“Some time this evening.” His father looked suddenly tired.
“The shit’s really going to hit the fan over this one.” Zak sat down at the table as his father poured them both a drink.
“I know.” Bill sighed. “I’m glad we’re all having dinner tonight. It’ll take my mind off it.”
He put a glass of beer down in front of Zak.
“I’m glad I got the chance to talk to you before Lee arrives,” he said, in a tone that made Zak tense. That was the tone he used for difficult topics. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”
“Really?” Zak took his glass warily.
“Yes.” Bill sighed and then looked Zak straight in the eye. “It’s about the frat regs.”
“Oh.” Zak took a long swallow of beer.
“You don’t seem surprised.”
Zak shrugged. “Had to come up sometime. I’ve been waiting for it ever since I heard that Tigh had put a stop to Boomer and the Chief’s relationship.” He took a deep breath and met his father’s eyes, bracing himself. He’d find out the worst and work out how to deal with it later. “So, are you going to tell me to stop seeing Kara?”
“Those are the rules, Zak. You know that as well as I do.”
“I know, but...”
“But what?”
“It still sucks.” Zak smiled bitterly, fighting down a surge of anger. Kara was one of the few bright spots left in his life, and now he was being told he couldn’t have her, just because of some stupid regulation laid down by someone who had never dreamed of anything like the current situation.
“I know,” said Bill. Zak was surprised to see sympathy in his face, and his anger dissipated slightly.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I know it’s not your fault. Those are the rules.”
“They are,” said Bill slowly, “but…”
The tone of his voice made Zak look at him sharply. “But?”
“Well, you and Kara…it’s a slightly different situation to Boomer and the Chief. You’re equal in rank, and work in different sections of the ship.”
“What are you saying?” Hope bubbled up inside him.
“I’m saying that if you keep it discreet, I’ll turn a blind eye.”
“Thanks, Dad.” A broad smile spread over Zak’s face. “You don’t know how much this means to me.”
Bill looked at his face and smiled. “I may have some idea. But remember what I said.” He frowned at Zak, but his eyes were still smiling. “Discreet.”
“Discreet. Got it.” Zak saluted, grinning, as a knock on the hatch signalled Lee’s arrival.
“Sorry I’m late,” said Lee, taking the seat opposite Zak. “I just got off CAP, and there was a queue for the showers.”
“Well, as long as you did shower,” joked Zak, as Bill dished up their meal. “If not, I hope Dad put a lot of garlic in the stew.”
“Shut up, Zak. I’ve seen the state of your locker.” Lee grinned. “I think the smell knocked me out for a few minutes.”
Zak stuck his tongue out amiably as Bill put their plates down in front of them, chuckling.
“Boys, am I going to have to send you to separate rooms?”
Zak grinned as he dug into his stew, but his enjoyment of the meal didn’t last. After a few minutes their father asked Lee how he was getting on as a fully-qualified pilot, and they were off. Techniques for staying alert on CAP drifted into the best combat formations and then into the correct way to pull off a Virgon spiral. When Bill started drawing the manoeuvre on the tablecloth with his fork, Zak knocked back the rest of his beer.
“Refill anyone?”
Lee nodded and passed Zak his glass, giving him a slightly odd look.
Zak went to refill the glasses, tuning out their conversation. When he returned to the table though, he knew exactly what had been said. The table cloth had been smoothed, the fork discarded, and his father asked him with careful interest how his work on improving the FTL drive was progressing.
Zak cursed his brother inwardly. Damn Lee. He didn’t need his pity.
He took his revenge by describing his work in as much detail as possible, and watched their eyes glaze over with bitter satisfaction.
When the phone rang, Bill almost leaped out of his chair to answer it.
Zak watched his face as he answered, and knew what he was being told. He met his father’s eyes as he replaced the receiver.
“Now?”
“Yes.” Bill went to switch on the radio.
Lee was looking between them, confused. “What’s going on?”
“Just listen.”
The reception was erratic, but Laura Roslin’s voice echoed around the cabin strongly enough.
“…in the interest of security and public safety, I feel it is time to reveal certain information that has, until now, remained a tightly guarded secret. This information was known only to myself, Commander Adama, and a few select advisers.”
Lee was still frowning. He’d opened his mouth to ask another question when Roslin’s next words silenced him.
“The Cylons have the ability to mimic human form, they look like us now. We have reason to believe that a Cylon agent was responsible for the explosions aboard Galactica. This man has been identified as a Cylon agent. We believe him to be responsible for the bombing…”
They listened to the rest of her speech in silence, until the reporters started clamouring with questions and Bill snapped the radio off.
“There are times when I’m extremely glad I’m not President,” he said wryly, and Zak smiled.
“The Cylons…the Cylons look like us now?” Lee was staring at both of them in numb disbelief.
Bill looked at him gravely. “Yes. I know it’s a shock, son.”
Lee was silent for a moment. Zak could almost see his mind racing. “So that means…anyone could be a Cylon?”
“Yes,” said Bill grimly. “Apparently there are twelve models. We’ve only identified two.”
“Frak.”
“Exactly,” said Zak.
Lee drew a deep breath. He looked up at their father, and Zak caught his breath. He knew that rigid expression on Lee’s face. It always meant trouble.
“And you knew about this?” said Lee tightly. “For how long?”
“Since Ragnar Anchorage,” said Bill casually, sitting back down at the table. “I encountered one of these human cylons there.”
“Since the day of the attacks?” Lee’s voice was rising now. “But that was weeks ago!”
Bill looked at him, brows lowering. “Your point?” he said sharply.
“And you said nothing?”
Bill’s jaw was tightening now. “I told the people who needed to know.”
Zak watched them, dread tightening in his stomach. He felt as if he had been catapulted back to the family dinners of his childhood, watching his father and brother gearing up for battle. He felt as if he should do something, say something to try and calm matters, but he couldn’t. His tongue wouldn’t seem to work.
“The people who needed to know? A few military flunkies?” Lee’s eyes were blazing now. “I’ll tell you who needed to know, Dad. The people of this fleet. They needed to know.”
Bill sat up in his chair, glaring. “Telling the civilians would have done more harm than good.”
“You had no right to keep it from us! This means that Cylons could be living anywhere among us in the fleet. People need to be on their guard-”
“And that would only have led to a witch hunt. People suspecting their neighbours, accusing them of being Cylons on the slightest excuse-”
“Wow, you have a really low opinion of civilians, don’t you?” Lee said scornfully. “But then you’ve always regarded anyone outside the military as a lower species.”
“That’s absolute crap,” snapped Bill. “I was just doing what I thought was best for this fleet.”
“And who gave you the right to do that? No-one. You have no authority to decide what the rest of us should and shouldn’t know-”
“Well, President Roslin does. Is she civilian enough for your tastes?” Bill’s voice was scathing.
“Oh, President Roslin!” Lee dismissed her scornfully. “The school teacher. And who voted for her, exactly? New elections should be held as soon as possible - Tom Zarek was right about that much.”
Bill got to his feet, breathing heavily. “Tom Zarek was a terrorist and a murderer.”
“Maybe, but some of his ideas made a lot of sense.” Lee stared at his father contemptuously. “But I bet you haven’t even bothered to read his book, have you? If the government says he’s a criminal, then he must be one.”
“That’s enough, Lee!” Bill growled, and Zak flinched. “I don’t have to answer to you.”
“Of course you don’t.” Lee stood to face his father, lips curving scornfully. “How nice it must be, to be so damned certain you’re right about everything.”
“Don’t you talk to me in that tone. Ensign.”
Lee stiffened. “And don’t you dare pull rank on me. Dad.”
They stared at each other for a moment, chins jutting out at an identical stubborn angle. Zak didn’t dare move.
Finally his father spoke, low and hard. “Leave. Now.”
Lee stared at him for a moment longer, and then his eyes dropped. “My pleasure,” he snapped, and stalked out.
Zak looked down at his hands and realised he’d dug his nails into his palms so hard that he’d nearly drawn blood.
So much for their relaxed family dinner.
----
He ended up going after Lee, of course. Childhood habits kicking right back in. He caught up with his brother halfway down the corridor.
“Lee, wait a minute!”
Lee stopped and rounded on him sharply; his temper was obviously still running at full steam. “Why? So you can defend him?”
Zak sighed wearily, annoyed with himself. Why was he doing this? Why did he still feel he had to act as peacemaker between them? “Lee…”
“Or are you defending yourself?” Lee snapped, his eyes bright and accusing. “You knew about this too, didn’t you?”
“Yes, since Ragnar. So?” Zak found his own temper stirring. Lee always irritated the hell out of him in one of these moods.
“And you just kept quiet about it?”
“Yes.”
“You didn’t think the rest of us had a right to know?”
“Lee, calm down.” Futile words, no doubt, but he had to try. “For what it’s worth I agree with you; I think the news should have been made public sooner. If for no other reason than that everyone was looking for the models we’ve already identified. Today’s bombing might not have happened then.”
“What - you agree with me?” Lee stared at him. “Then why didn’t you do anything about it? Make the news public?”
“Lee, it wasn’t my decision to make! It was the President’s - and Dad’s.”
“And you just went along with it?”
“I followed my orders,” said Zak impatiently. “That’s what we do in the military, Lee.” Sarcasm throbbed through his voice.
Lee frowned. “Even if you don’t agree with the decision? Even if it goes against what you think is right?”
“Yes.”
Lee smiled scornfully. “Just sounds like a convenient excuse to do nothing to me.”
Zak’s temper finally snapped. “Oh really? Tell me, Lee, what the frak do you think would happen if everyone in fleet service started questioning their orders? Second guessing their officers? The military would fall apart.”
“I understand that,” said Lee impatiently. “But when obeying conflicts with your own principles-”
“It doesn’t matter!” Didn’t Lee understand? It was so clear to Zak; why couldn’t his brother see it? “When you swear the oath, take the uniform, you put everything personal to one side. Your duty to the fleet, to your commanding officer, comes first. You have to trust that your commander knows what he’s doing…and he usually does. He has more experience, access to information that you may not have.”
“So you just let someone else do your thinking for you?” Lee said with disgust. “I thought better of you, Zak.”
Zak flinched, but he shot back. “And I thought better of you. You’re making this all way too simple, just seizing on any excuse to criticise Dad.”
“Zak-”
“Don’t pretend this is all about abstract moral questions, Lee. It’s about you rebelling against Dad, just like always.”
“Zak.” Something flickered in Lee’s eyes. “Don’t - just don’t go there.”
Zak stared at him, exasperated. Typical Lee, avoiding the real issue. He might have pushed it, but he didn’t have the energy. “Fine.”
Lee shifted uncomfortably. “Zak-”
“Lee, you’ve got to stop thinking like a civilian.” He was going to have his say on this issue if nothing else. “You’re in the military now, and you have to live by our rules.” Some of the things Lee had been saying were uncomfortably close to mutiny.
“I understand that, Zak.” Lee’s eyes were cooler now. “Look, I think it’s best if I go. I need to calm down.”
Zak nodded. He’d had about enough of his brother this evening anyway.
It wasn’t until several minutes after Lee had gone that he realised that while Lee had said he understood, he hadn’t said that he agreed with him.
Lee stumbled wearily into the pilots’ bunkroom, and was relieved to find it empty. He’d just flown his first CAP as a fully-fledged pilot, and it had been more tiring than he expected, particularly following on from a long maintenance shift. All he wanted was some quiet and a chance to sleep. He sat down on the edge of his bunk and slowly began to unlace his boots, yawning widely.
“Tired, Apollo? I thought gods were inexhaustible.”
Correction - the bunkroom was nearly empty. Lee looked up, scowling, to find Kara grinning down at him from the top bunk opposite.
“Stop calling me that.”
Kara’s eyes sparkled maliciously. “Aw, Lee, don’t you like your new name?”
“It’s not my name.” Lee finished unlacing his boots with a few angry jerks. “It’s a joke, and one I sincerely hope everyone forgets as soon as possible.”
“Too late for that. Once you’re gifted with a call-sign, you’re stuck with it for good. It’s tradition.”
Lee glared down at the deck. “Frak tradition.”
“You can frak it all you like, it won’t change anything,” Kara said briskly. “Come on Lee, it’s not so bad. Better than Hotdog.”
Lee scowled, pulling off his socks. In a way, he would have preferred Hotdog. Better than a callsign that had been given to him just for being William Adama’s son.
“Why are you so tired, anyway?” asked Kara. “Don’t tell me one little CAP wore you out.”
Lee looked up at her and glared. He could tell she was trying not to laugh underneath her bland expression.
“Why am I tired? Maybe because I spent three hours searching the maintenance lockers for a part that doesn’t frakking exist.”
Kara’s mouth trembled and the laughter burst out. Lee watched her unsmiling.
“Frak you.”
“Really, Apollo, that’s no way to talk to your superior officer.”
“Very well. Frak you, Captain Thrace, sir.”
Kara laughed again. “Well, maybe that will teach you not to steal all the pens for my whiteboard, Ensign Adama.”
Lee couldn’t help smiling at that memory. “You didn’t need them. I thought you did a great job demonstrating how to perform a Picon Arc through actions alone.”
Kara pulled a face. “I must have looked like a complete idiot.”
“I wouldn’t worry.” Lee grinned. “No-one would dare to say so to your face.”
“Bastard,” said Kara, but she grinned back. “And shut up. Some of us are trying to get some sleep.” She lay back down, smirking.
Lee stripped down to his tanks and boxers, and lay down on his rack with a sigh of relief…only to find his head hitting something cold and wet. He yelped in surprise and sat back up.
“What the hell…”
Kara peered over the edge of her bunk irritatedly. “What is it now?”
Lee grabbed his pillow and dropped it on the floor in disgust. “This is soaking. Gods know with what.” He looked up at Kara suspiciously.
She spread her hands innocently. “Nothing to do with me this time. I restrict our little game to working hours.”
True enough. “Sorry.” Lee sighed and lay back down. The mattress was hard and uncomfortable without a pillow. “Does everyone on this ship spend all their time playing practical jokes?”
“Hazard of being a nugget,” said Kara unsympathetically. “Hazing goes with the territory when you join a new crew.”
“I know,” said Lee with resignation. “And this is mild, compared to what I’ve seen on some freighters.”
“Why? What goes on?”
Lee opened his mouth to reply and caught his breath as a memory blindsided him. Harsh, jagged breaths echoing inside his helmet, his hands raw and aching from banging frantically on the locked hatch, the hollow panic in his chest as he watched his oxygen slowly drip away…
“Lee?”
He shook his head, pushing the memories fiercely away, annoyed that they were still so vivid. That was all over long ago, he should have forgotten all about it. It didn’t matter now, he wouldn’t let it.
He realised Kara was still waiting for an answer.
“Well, at least here there’s no physical injury involved,” he said finally. “Look Kara, I really need to get some sleep.” He closed his eyes.
“Fine. I wouldn’t like to disturb your divine rest.”
Lee mustered the energy to raise his hand and extend a finger.
He heard a smothered chuckle, and then something hit him in the chest. His eyes flew open to find a pillow lying on top of him.
He turned his head to look at Kara in surprise. “Thanks.”
“No need.” She grinned. “I’m tough enough to sleep without one.”
Lee chuckled and pulled his curtain shut.
----
Zak finished his shift in CIC and headed to his father’s quarters. Even though they were all on the same ship now, Bill had kept up his new custom of regular family dinners.
Zak knocked on the hatch without enthusiasm. He’d enjoyed the meals at first, but since Lee had joined the fleet, the conversation always seemed to be about flying - something Zak couldn’t join in.
He didn’t know why he was so sensitive about it. It wasn’t as though he’d ever had any great desire to fly, apart from the wish to please his father. When he’d failed to get into flight school, he’d never really felt he’d missed out on anything. But…
But it was one thing to have inadequacies. It was another to have them rubbed in your face.
He entered to find his father alone in his cabin, laying the table. Bill looked up and smiled at him.
“Good evening, Captain. Did you get the inquiry room set up for Sergeant Hadrian?”
Zak nodded. “All done. When is the President going public?”
“Some time this evening.” His father looked suddenly tired.
“The shit’s really going to hit the fan over this one.” Zak sat down at the table as his father poured them both a drink.
“I know.” Bill sighed. “I’m glad we’re all having dinner tonight. It’ll take my mind off it.”
He put a glass of beer down in front of Zak.
“I’m glad I got the chance to talk to you before Lee arrives,” he said, in a tone that made Zak tense. That was the tone he used for difficult topics. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”
“Really?” Zak took his glass warily.
“Yes.” Bill sighed and then looked Zak straight in the eye. “It’s about the frat regs.”
“Oh.” Zak took a long swallow of beer.
“You don’t seem surprised.”
Zak shrugged. “Had to come up sometime. I’ve been waiting for it ever since I heard that Tigh had put a stop to Boomer and the Chief’s relationship.” He took a deep breath and met his father’s eyes, bracing himself. He’d find out the worst and work out how to deal with it later. “So, are you going to tell me to stop seeing Kara?”
“Those are the rules, Zak. You know that as well as I do.”
“I know, but...”
“But what?”
“It still sucks.” Zak smiled bitterly, fighting down a surge of anger. Kara was one of the few bright spots left in his life, and now he was being told he couldn’t have her, just because of some stupid regulation laid down by someone who had never dreamed of anything like the current situation.
“I know,” said Bill. Zak was surprised to see sympathy in his face, and his anger dissipated slightly.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I know it’s not your fault. Those are the rules.”
“They are,” said Bill slowly, “but…”
The tone of his voice made Zak look at him sharply. “But?”
“Well, you and Kara…it’s a slightly different situation to Boomer and the Chief. You’re equal in rank, and work in different sections of the ship.”
“What are you saying?” Hope bubbled up inside him.
“I’m saying that if you keep it discreet, I’ll turn a blind eye.”
“Thanks, Dad.” A broad smile spread over Zak’s face. “You don’t know how much this means to me.”
Bill looked at his face and smiled. “I may have some idea. But remember what I said.” He frowned at Zak, but his eyes were still smiling. “Discreet.”
“Discreet. Got it.” Zak saluted, grinning, as a knock on the hatch signalled Lee’s arrival.
“Sorry I’m late,” said Lee, taking the seat opposite Zak. “I just got off CAP, and there was a queue for the showers.”
“Well, as long as you did shower,” joked Zak, as Bill dished up their meal. “If not, I hope Dad put a lot of garlic in the stew.”
“Shut up, Zak. I’ve seen the state of your locker.” Lee grinned. “I think the smell knocked me out for a few minutes.”
Zak stuck his tongue out amiably as Bill put their plates down in front of them, chuckling.
“Boys, am I going to have to send you to separate rooms?”
Zak grinned as he dug into his stew, but his enjoyment of the meal didn’t last. After a few minutes their father asked Lee how he was getting on as a fully-qualified pilot, and they were off. Techniques for staying alert on CAP drifted into the best combat formations and then into the correct way to pull off a Virgon spiral. When Bill started drawing the manoeuvre on the tablecloth with his fork, Zak knocked back the rest of his beer.
“Refill anyone?”
Lee nodded and passed Zak his glass, giving him a slightly odd look.
Zak went to refill the glasses, tuning out their conversation. When he returned to the table though, he knew exactly what had been said. The table cloth had been smoothed, the fork discarded, and his father asked him with careful interest how his work on improving the FTL drive was progressing.
Zak cursed his brother inwardly. Damn Lee. He didn’t need his pity.
He took his revenge by describing his work in as much detail as possible, and watched their eyes glaze over with bitter satisfaction.
When the phone rang, Bill almost leaped out of his chair to answer it.
Zak watched his face as he answered, and knew what he was being told. He met his father’s eyes as he replaced the receiver.
“Now?”
“Yes.” Bill went to switch on the radio.
Lee was looking between them, confused. “What’s going on?”
“Just listen.”
The reception was erratic, but Laura Roslin’s voice echoed around the cabin strongly enough.
“…in the interest of security and public safety, I feel it is time to reveal certain information that has, until now, remained a tightly guarded secret. This information was known only to myself, Commander Adama, and a few select advisers.”
Lee was still frowning. He’d opened his mouth to ask another question when Roslin’s next words silenced him.
“The Cylons have the ability to mimic human form, they look like us now. We have reason to believe that a Cylon agent was responsible for the explosions aboard Galactica. This man has been identified as a Cylon agent. We believe him to be responsible for the bombing…”
They listened to the rest of her speech in silence, until the reporters started clamouring with questions and Bill snapped the radio off.
“There are times when I’m extremely glad I’m not President,” he said wryly, and Zak smiled.
“The Cylons…the Cylons look like us now?” Lee was staring at both of them in numb disbelief.
Bill looked at him gravely. “Yes. I know it’s a shock, son.”
Lee was silent for a moment. Zak could almost see his mind racing. “So that means…anyone could be a Cylon?”
“Yes,” said Bill grimly. “Apparently there are twelve models. We’ve only identified two.”
“Frak.”
“Exactly,” said Zak.
Lee drew a deep breath. He looked up at their father, and Zak caught his breath. He knew that rigid expression on Lee’s face. It always meant trouble.
“And you knew about this?” said Lee tightly. “For how long?”
“Since Ragnar Anchorage,” said Bill casually, sitting back down at the table. “I encountered one of these human cylons there.”
“Since the day of the attacks?” Lee’s voice was rising now. “But that was weeks ago!”
Bill looked at him, brows lowering. “Your point?” he said sharply.
“And you said nothing?”
Bill’s jaw was tightening now. “I told the people who needed to know.”
Zak watched them, dread tightening in his stomach. He felt as if he had been catapulted back to the family dinners of his childhood, watching his father and brother gearing up for battle. He felt as if he should do something, say something to try and calm matters, but he couldn’t. His tongue wouldn’t seem to work.
“The people who needed to know? A few military flunkies?” Lee’s eyes were blazing now. “I’ll tell you who needed to know, Dad. The people of this fleet. They needed to know.”
Bill sat up in his chair, glaring. “Telling the civilians would have done more harm than good.”
“You had no right to keep it from us! This means that Cylons could be living anywhere among us in the fleet. People need to be on their guard-”
“And that would only have led to a witch hunt. People suspecting their neighbours, accusing them of being Cylons on the slightest excuse-”
“Wow, you have a really low opinion of civilians, don’t you?” Lee said scornfully. “But then you’ve always regarded anyone outside the military as a lower species.”
“That’s absolute crap,” snapped Bill. “I was just doing what I thought was best for this fleet.”
“And who gave you the right to do that? No-one. You have no authority to decide what the rest of us should and shouldn’t know-”
“Well, President Roslin does. Is she civilian enough for your tastes?” Bill’s voice was scathing.
“Oh, President Roslin!” Lee dismissed her scornfully. “The school teacher. And who voted for her, exactly? New elections should be held as soon as possible - Tom Zarek was right about that much.”
Bill got to his feet, breathing heavily. “Tom Zarek was a terrorist and a murderer.”
“Maybe, but some of his ideas made a lot of sense.” Lee stared at his father contemptuously. “But I bet you haven’t even bothered to read his book, have you? If the government says he’s a criminal, then he must be one.”
“That’s enough, Lee!” Bill growled, and Zak flinched. “I don’t have to answer to you.”
“Of course you don’t.” Lee stood to face his father, lips curving scornfully. “How nice it must be, to be so damned certain you’re right about everything.”
“Don’t you talk to me in that tone. Ensign.”
Lee stiffened. “And don’t you dare pull rank on me. Dad.”
They stared at each other for a moment, chins jutting out at an identical stubborn angle. Zak didn’t dare move.
Finally his father spoke, low and hard. “Leave. Now.”
Lee stared at him for a moment longer, and then his eyes dropped. “My pleasure,” he snapped, and stalked out.
Zak looked down at his hands and realised he’d dug his nails into his palms so hard that he’d nearly drawn blood.
So much for their relaxed family dinner.
----
He ended up going after Lee, of course. Childhood habits kicking right back in. He caught up with his brother halfway down the corridor.
“Lee, wait a minute!”
Lee stopped and rounded on him sharply; his temper was obviously still running at full steam. “Why? So you can defend him?”
Zak sighed wearily, annoyed with himself. Why was he doing this? Why did he still feel he had to act as peacemaker between them? “Lee…”
“Or are you defending yourself?” Lee snapped, his eyes bright and accusing. “You knew about this too, didn’t you?”
“Yes, since Ragnar. So?” Zak found his own temper stirring. Lee always irritated the hell out of him in one of these moods.
“And you just kept quiet about it?”
“Yes.”
“You didn’t think the rest of us had a right to know?”
“Lee, calm down.” Futile words, no doubt, but he had to try. “For what it’s worth I agree with you; I think the news should have been made public sooner. If for no other reason than that everyone was looking for the models we’ve already identified. Today’s bombing might not have happened then.”
“What - you agree with me?” Lee stared at him. “Then why didn’t you do anything about it? Make the news public?”
“Lee, it wasn’t my decision to make! It was the President’s - and Dad’s.”
“And you just went along with it?”
“I followed my orders,” said Zak impatiently. “That’s what we do in the military, Lee.” Sarcasm throbbed through his voice.
Lee frowned. “Even if you don’t agree with the decision? Even if it goes against what you think is right?”
“Yes.”
Lee smiled scornfully. “Just sounds like a convenient excuse to do nothing to me.”
Zak’s temper finally snapped. “Oh really? Tell me, Lee, what the frak do you think would happen if everyone in fleet service started questioning their orders? Second guessing their officers? The military would fall apart.”
“I understand that,” said Lee impatiently. “But when obeying conflicts with your own principles-”
“It doesn’t matter!” Didn’t Lee understand? It was so clear to Zak; why couldn’t his brother see it? “When you swear the oath, take the uniform, you put everything personal to one side. Your duty to the fleet, to your commanding officer, comes first. You have to trust that your commander knows what he’s doing…and he usually does. He has more experience, access to information that you may not have.”
“So you just let someone else do your thinking for you?” Lee said with disgust. “I thought better of you, Zak.”
Zak flinched, but he shot back. “And I thought better of you. You’re making this all way too simple, just seizing on any excuse to criticise Dad.”
“Zak-”
“Don’t pretend this is all about abstract moral questions, Lee. It’s about you rebelling against Dad, just like always.”
“Zak.” Something flickered in Lee’s eyes. “Don’t - just don’t go there.”
Zak stared at him, exasperated. Typical Lee, avoiding the real issue. He might have pushed it, but he didn’t have the energy. “Fine.”
Lee shifted uncomfortably. “Zak-”
“Lee, you’ve got to stop thinking like a civilian.” He was going to have his say on this issue if nothing else. “You’re in the military now, and you have to live by our rules.” Some of the things Lee had been saying were uncomfortably close to mutiny.
“I understand that, Zak.” Lee’s eyes were cooler now. “Look, I think it’s best if I go. I need to calm down.”
Zak nodded. He’d had about enough of his brother this evening anyway.
It wasn’t until several minutes after Lee had gone that he realised that while Lee had said he understood, he hadn’t said that he agreed with him.