188 Fic: Time to Wake Up (River/Dawn)
Title Time to Wake Up
Author Brutti ma buoni
Rating PG13 for possibly distressing themes and angst
Word Count 950
Prompt 188 (High School). Originally for cmk418 at femslash_minis who wanted mind reading, the Academy, slippers, and no vampires or character death
Characters/Pairing (if any) River/Dawn
A/N: Though River is at the Academy, I'm going with the Serenity retcon of her age, and consider her to be 16 at minimum during this fic. It is set shortly before her escape.
It hurts.
River hurts.
River doesn’t sleep now. Only endures.
The pain feels greater in the lonely dark. Which is illogical. Psychosomatic magnification of physical symptoms is a commonplace. For people who can’t rationalise.
It annoys River, to find her mind just like other people’s.
She’s special. It’s why she is here at the Academy.
It’s why she is suffering here.
Maybe special isn’t such a good thing to be?
*
There are tutors. This Academy may be a facade for deeper purposes, but they don’t keep their students ignorant and untaught.
Most are brilliant, rigorous, heartless. Stony minds, off which River’s sensitivities rebound, bruised.
She hurts.
*
One tutor is different. Younger, with a smile for the students. Words that aren’t utilitarian.
“How are you today, River?”
And, “Did you enjoy the reading?”
These are questions without intent. They are... nice.
Sometimes they make River smile, and the tutor smiles back. Human interaction is a necessity. River blossoms.
*
There is something wrong with the tutor. River notices it from the first. Not only her difference, her attempts to connect with her brutalised prodigies. No.
Something about the tutor herself. Over time, River narrows the focus to the tutor’s face. Then her eyes.
Her eyes are huge, blue-green and beautiful. Her eyes are old. And sad.
River looks - really looks - deep into Lady Summers’ eyes and knows she’s wrong. All wrong and out of time and timeless and trapped and hurting and unending-
Too much.
*
River wakes in the medibay. She comes here often; all the students do. They are poked and probed and tested over and over like rats in a lab, so that They (whoever they be) can know more and achieve more and ask more of the students till they find the elusive thing they have been striving for.
She has never before been here for actual sickness. It is different. She has a bed. With blankets. Some of her personal things are here. Fuzzy slippers Simon gave her as a going away present are sitting under a visitor’s chair. (“I know you’re all grown up, little one. But sometimes your toes will need cosseting. It’ll warm your soul.” Her brother knows about the necessity of human contact too.)
On the chair is the Lady. She looks anxious. She says, “Are you all right, River?”
River is all right for the moment. Generally speaking, she is very far from all right, the Academy is all wrong, but that isn’t germane to today’s question.
So she says, “Yes.”
The Lady says, “Don’t tell. Please.” She is scared.
River nods. She doesn’t want the Lady to become a lab rat like the rest of them. That’s what happens to people who are different. Who are special.
The Lady asks, “Can you sleep?”
River says no, because it’s the truth. The Lady nods in turn, brings a finger to her own lips, and then brushes that finger against River’s mouth.
Human touch. It has been lacking.
“Try to rest. I will be back later,” says the Lady.
*
That night, when River isn’t sleeping, she feels a mind nudging at her own. She wants to reject; this happens too often. But tonight’s mind is delicate, gentle, non-invasive. Brushing sweetly, like the kissed finger to her lips. It’s the Lady.
In her mind, the Lady isn’t a slim young woman with long hair and beautiful eyes. In her mind, she’s not a person at all. Her mind flows with green, glowing effulgent in the grey regimentation that was once River’s own beautiful mind.
Who are you?
I’m Dawn.
Who’s Dawn?
Dawn is just a girl. Far from home. Missing her family. A little older than she looks, but it’s starting to show, judging by your thoughts yesterday.
River’s mind giggles. It’s the first time at the Academy.
You’re still very pretty.
The Lady’s mind smiles back.
Thank you.
They pause. (Speaking in minds is hard on the brain.) They commune without words.
I miss stories. Tell me about Dawn.
The Lady is sad. River wants to take it back, but she also wants to know more. To connect. To have a friend in this friendless place.
So the Lady tells her about Earth That Was, about sunshine and cities and flowers and strawberries for everyone. About sisters and friends, long gone.
About immortality.
River reaches out with her mind, hoping to comfort. But the Lady has walls where others have breaches in their emotions. She won’t take comfort for what can’t be mended.
I’ll go on. It’s what I do. If I don’t go on... then no one goes on. The Key bleeds into the universe. The dimensions fall.
The Lady shakes herself. Funny to feel that in your mind. It tickles River, distracts her momentarily from the Key, the worlds colliding absorbing mutating destroying into the void no no no-
The Lady’s mind reaches out to calm her.
See? says the Lady. I have to go on. But I try to do good things as I go. I came to the Academy because it’s a bad place. We need to change that. I need someone to go out into the verse and tell people about the Academy. I need someone to be brave. Will you do that?
And River thinks about the outside. About family and freedom from pain. She thinks, YES.
Nights after that, they start to plan how River will get out.
She doesn’t want to leave the Lady behind. But Lady Summers-Dawn-the Key says, because she has all the time in the world, Too late for me. But this too shall pass.
***
Author Brutti ma buoni
Rating PG13 for possibly distressing themes and angst
Word Count 950
Prompt 188 (High School). Originally for cmk418 at femslash_minis who wanted mind reading, the Academy, slippers, and no vampires or character death
Characters/Pairing (if any) River/Dawn
A/N: Though River is at the Academy, I'm going with the Serenity retcon of her age, and consider her to be 16 at minimum during this fic. It is set shortly before her escape.
It hurts.
River hurts.
River doesn’t sleep now. Only endures.
The pain feels greater in the lonely dark. Which is illogical. Psychosomatic magnification of physical symptoms is a commonplace. For people who can’t rationalise.
It annoys River, to find her mind just like other people’s.
She’s special. It’s why she is here at the Academy.
It’s why she is suffering here.
Maybe special isn’t such a good thing to be?
*
There are tutors. This Academy may be a facade for deeper purposes, but they don’t keep their students ignorant and untaught.
Most are brilliant, rigorous, heartless. Stony minds, off which River’s sensitivities rebound, bruised.
She hurts.
*
One tutor is different. Younger, with a smile for the students. Words that aren’t utilitarian.
“How are you today, River?”
And, “Did you enjoy the reading?”
These are questions without intent. They are... nice.
Sometimes they make River smile, and the tutor smiles back. Human interaction is a necessity. River blossoms.
*
There is something wrong with the tutor. River notices it from the first. Not only her difference, her attempts to connect with her brutalised prodigies. No.
Something about the tutor herself. Over time, River narrows the focus to the tutor’s face. Then her eyes.
Her eyes are huge, blue-green and beautiful. Her eyes are old. And sad.
River looks - really looks - deep into Lady Summers’ eyes and knows she’s wrong. All wrong and out of time and timeless and trapped and hurting and unending-
Too much.
*
River wakes in the medibay. She comes here often; all the students do. They are poked and probed and tested over and over like rats in a lab, so that They (whoever they be) can know more and achieve more and ask more of the students till they find the elusive thing they have been striving for.
She has never before been here for actual sickness. It is different. She has a bed. With blankets. Some of her personal things are here. Fuzzy slippers Simon gave her as a going away present are sitting under a visitor’s chair. (“I know you’re all grown up, little one. But sometimes your toes will need cosseting. It’ll warm your soul.” Her brother knows about the necessity of human contact too.)
On the chair is the Lady. She looks anxious. She says, “Are you all right, River?”
River is all right for the moment. Generally speaking, she is very far from all right, the Academy is all wrong, but that isn’t germane to today’s question.
So she says, “Yes.”
The Lady says, “Don’t tell. Please.” She is scared.
River nods. She doesn’t want the Lady to become a lab rat like the rest of them. That’s what happens to people who are different. Who are special.
The Lady asks, “Can you sleep?”
River says no, because it’s the truth. The Lady nods in turn, brings a finger to her own lips, and then brushes that finger against River’s mouth.
Human touch. It has been lacking.
“Try to rest. I will be back later,” says the Lady.
*
That night, when River isn’t sleeping, she feels a mind nudging at her own. She wants to reject; this happens too often. But tonight’s mind is delicate, gentle, non-invasive. Brushing sweetly, like the kissed finger to her lips. It’s the Lady.
In her mind, the Lady isn’t a slim young woman with long hair and beautiful eyes. In her mind, she’s not a person at all. Her mind flows with green, glowing effulgent in the grey regimentation that was once River’s own beautiful mind.
Who are you?
I’m Dawn.
Who’s Dawn?
Dawn is just a girl. Far from home. Missing her family. A little older than she looks, but it’s starting to show, judging by your thoughts yesterday.
River’s mind giggles. It’s the first time at the Academy.
You’re still very pretty.
The Lady’s mind smiles back.
Thank you.
They pause. (Speaking in minds is hard on the brain.) They commune without words.
I miss stories. Tell me about Dawn.
The Lady is sad. River wants to take it back, but she also wants to know more. To connect. To have a friend in this friendless place.
So the Lady tells her about Earth That Was, about sunshine and cities and flowers and strawberries for everyone. About sisters and friends, long gone.
About immortality.
River reaches out with her mind, hoping to comfort. But the Lady has walls where others have breaches in their emotions. She won’t take comfort for what can’t be mended.
I’ll go on. It’s what I do. If I don’t go on... then no one goes on. The Key bleeds into the universe. The dimensions fall.
The Lady shakes herself. Funny to feel that in your mind. It tickles River, distracts her momentarily from the Key, the worlds colliding absorbing mutating destroying into the void no no no-
The Lady’s mind reaches out to calm her.
See? says the Lady. I have to go on. But I try to do good things as I go. I came to the Academy because it’s a bad place. We need to change that. I need someone to go out into the verse and tell people about the Academy. I need someone to be brave. Will you do that?
And River thinks about the outside. About family and freedom from pain. She thinks, YES.
Nights after that, they start to plan how River will get out.
She doesn’t want to leave the Lady behind. But Lady Summers-Dawn-the Key says, because she has all the time in the world, Too late for me. But this too shall pass.
***