I'm feeling a new kind of restless today. I sort of saw it coming, what with the "what will I be doing this summer" thing and all ( Read more... )

I think what bothers me most about this semester isn't so much what's been happening, but more how I've reacted. Ideally, I wouldn't complain so much and I'd roll with the punches better. And maybe that's truly the point, in the grand scheme of things. Better to work on these issues now, while I'm still not in the real world. I'm clearly not ready ( Read more... )

Well. That was frustrating. The next person who tells me that he or she can sympathize with what I'm going through will be kicked in the shin. Three times. I don't want sympathy. I want solutions, people. Solutions!

Right now life seems less real to me than my dreams. I'm not entirely sure how to describe it. I almost just can't feel. I'm drifting through the day, numb to everything around me, not exactly sure what I was doing a few hours ago... a few minutes ago. You know how when you're really bored, or you're doing something really tedious, or you're ( Read more... )

I find it amusing that Prasad always has to help me finish my sentences when I'm explaining or clarifying something. I know it's just a habit, acknowledging that he understands, and it's not even that annoying (yet), but I'm tempted to just start inserting random words that make no sense into my explanations. "Yeah, you just take the square root of ( Read more... )

I’ve been dreading the first signs of winter since September, when they were clearly not evident. But today, in so many ways, is a winter day. It’s gray, cold, and windy. And… I saw some white stuff ( Read more... )

It seems so much harder these days to write anything of substance in here.

It seems so much harder these days to find anything of substance in my life.

Someone explain this phenomenon to me: the more outgoing and social I am, the emptier I feel inside, and the less I feel like I connect to people ( Read more... )

This morning, I got to thinking: I'm not afraid of failure. That's far too cliche. I'm afraid of mediocrity. Suffice to say that implies that I'm terrified of failure. But if I have to be mediocre, I might as well fail ( Read more... )

You shouldn't be surprised to know that I hate small talk. I am an INTJ, after all. It's not that I'm particularly horrible at small talk, but I don't even pay attention to myself when I do it. I will carry on such a "conversation" for minutes on end, and the instant I walk away, I've already forgotten 98% of the things I said or heard ( Read more... )