Crack chat shippet, slightly porny
Sorry, self and Gene have been at the crack pipe again. But this made me smile so hard today. It progressed from daydreaming about Daaave porn into Doctor/Master crack with inventive comedy ways on how to taunt the Doctor about Gallifrey some more. And jelly babies. Sorry. But... love.
[07:31] snowgrouse: *sigh* I do get a sort of perverse joy from making Dave suck cock.
[07:32] eugenia_45: Well, wif a mouf like that...
[07:32] snowgrouse: made for it, man.
[07:32] snowgrouse: Made for it.
[07:32] eugenia_45: That damned bottom lip... I see it and I want to bite it.
[07:32] snowgrouse: He's so oral.
[07:32] snowgrouse: yes.
[07:33] snowgrouse: especially on twink!Dave.
[07:33] eugenia_45: It's huuuge.
[07:33] eugenia_45: Yeah, damn.
[07:33] snowgrouse: red like flushed naughty bits!
[07:33] snowgrouse: He just needs to do porn.
[07:33] snowgrouse: Was just watching a flick where a dude kept on sucking another after the top had come in his mouth. And kept fucking dribbling the come out and wanking the guy still, and his hand was wet too... it was all wet and sticky and messy and UNF
[07:34] snowgrouse: and that was some fucking hot dribbling, not "ew, ptui" dribbling.
[07:34] eugenia_45: unf
[07:34] snowgrouse: Dave needs to do that. Imagine that mouth wide open. Just dripping.
[07:34] snowgrouse: spit and come. Please.
[07:35] snowgrouse: looking up with those big sad eyes.
[07:35] snowgrouse: unf, I say. UNF.
[07:35] eugenia_45: *shakes fist*
[07:35] eugenia_45: Damn you, Tennant. Do porn.
[07:36] snowgrouse: now.
[07:36] snowgrouse: I mean, all of the bits where he noms something, in Blackpool, Who, Secret Smile...
[07:36] eugenia_45: Seriously. I don't care what he noms so long as he noms something.
[07:37] eugenia_45: Even just someone's fingers, I'd be very happy with.
[07:37] snowgrouse: guh, fuck, yes.
[07:38] snowgrouse: Please, just... give him a scene where Ten gets gagged by the Master. The Master stuffing his tie into his mouth. Anything.
[07:38] snowgrouse: it's not like we can expect gagging with cocks, so... please.
[07:39] eugenia_45: Yes. A little Master thuggery would be lovely.
[07:39] eugenia_45: A quick jab to the stomach, shoving his tie down his throat, spinning him around, shoving him to the ground and kneeling on his back as the Master wrenches the Doctor's arms behind him. "Hi honey, I'm home."
[07:40] snowgrouse: YOU MAKE ME CRY.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Ha!
[07:40] snowgrouse: *sob* want.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Please.
[07:40] snowgrouse: My faps have had so much arm-wrenching imagery recently.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Or at the very least, an outtake where Dave snogs John all romance novel cover-y.
[07:40] snowgrouse: YES
[07:41] snowgrouse: for all we know, one exists already but wasn't ever released.
[07:42] eugenia_45: Is in RTD's special fapvault.
[07:42] snowgrouse: would be great for Dave to just grab John and dip him like they were dancing and lean over and kiss him OTT-tenderly.
[07:42] eugenia_45: Hahaha
[07:42] snowgrouse: you spin me right round baby right round
[07:42] snowgrouse: and yes, Rusty has all of that on tape:(
[07:42] eugenia_45: I want some Gomez and Morticia Addams kissing.
[07:43] snowgrouse: YES
[07:43] snowgrouse: That's the way they'd dance.
[07:44] snowgrouse: I want to shop this.
[07:45] snowgrouse: Especially since Master with a rose between his teeth=guaranteed way to make Ten sob in Rose emo.
[07:45] eugenia_45: Hahahaha
[07:45] eugenia_45: wose wubeded woses
[07:45] snowgrouse: ahahahahaaaaaa
[07:45] snowgrouse: okay, a daisy between his teefs, then.
[07:46] eugenia_45: Aww
[07:46] eugenia_45: That'll just make him go "waaaaah gallifwey!"
[07:46] snowgrouse: The Master knows which buttons to push.
[07:46] snowgrouse: which is beautiful.
[07:47] eugenia_45: I want a whole episode of the Master taunting him about Gallifrey some more.
[07:47] eugenia_45: In various comical forms.
[07:47] snowgrouse: ahahahahaaaaaaa
[07:47] snowgrouse: dancing in a red grass skirt.
[07:48] eugenia_45: Just like finding an open wound and digging his thumb in.
[07:48] snowgrouse: that should not sound sexy.
[07:48] eugenia_45: That's way more fun than making new wounds. Less effort too.
[07:48] snowgrouse: Yeah.
[07:48] snowgrouse: plus, once the Doctor becomes sensitised to the Gallifrey emos, the Master will have effectively healed him!
[07:49] snowgrouse: which can only be a good thing and he can start torturing the Doctor some more.
[07:49] eugenia_45: Hee
[07:49] snowgrouse: <3
[07:49] snowgrouse: shock therapy, man.
[07:49] snowgrouse: and, well, aversion therapy.
[07:49] snowgrouse: both in one.
[07:50] snowgrouse: Master doing a striptease performance with the full Timey regalia.
[07:50] eugenia_45: Ahahahahaha
[07:50] snowgrouse: The Full Rassilon.
[07:51] eugenia_45: Must play The Stripper while doing it, too.
[07:52] snowgrouse: YES
[07:52] snowgrouse: must.
[07:52] eugenia_45: Is lovely musical crack.
[07:53] snowgrouse: is.
[07:53] snowgrouse: what else?
[07:53] snowgrouse: how can he manifest twin suns?
[07:53] snowgrouse: Sticking two lights up his arse and mooning the Doctor?
[07:53] snowgrouse: Mangina-stylee?
[07:53] eugenia_45: Bra. With headlights on 'em.
[07:54] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhahahahaaaaaaa
[07:54] snowgrouse: silver trees=spraypainting his cock silver.
[07:54] eugenia_45: Or just paint his balls with fluorescent paint and stand on a chair and wiggle about.
[07:54] snowgrouse: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA
[07:54] snowgrouse: *ded*
[07:55] eugenia_45: Playing a little Here Comes the Sun.
[07:55] snowgrouse: *throws things at you*
[07:55] eugenia_45: *blows up your home planet*
[07:55] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhahahaaaa
[07:55] snowgrouse: Beautiful.
[07:56] snowgrouse: I imagine him building a big miniature set of Gallifrey and the surrounding systems.
[07:56] eugenia_45: Awww.
[07:56] eugenia_45: And then FIREWORKS TIME
[07:56] snowgrouse: YES
[07:57] snowgrouse: like a big fuckoff orrery or something.
[07:57] eugenia_45: Or they could just be pinatas and he prances around whacking Gallifrey with a baseball bat while blindfolded.
[07:57] snowgrouse: sending all the planets spinning around and with fireworks like some gigantic system of Catherine wheels.
[07:57] eugenia_45: And it's filled with jelly babies!
[07:57] snowgrouse: AHAHAHAHA
[07:57] snowgrouse: yes.
[07:59] snowgrouse: and all the jelly babies are cast in wee Time Lord shapes.
[07:59] eugenia_45: Bite their heads off!
[07:59] snowgrouse: "Oh, look, a red one! That's Romana! *chomp*"
[07:59] snowgrouse: YES
[08:00] snowgrouse: "and that's your brother! The green ones taste like shit anyway." *spits it out*
[08:00] eugenia_45: "Oh look, this one has pinstripes!" *LIIIIICK*
[08:01] eugenia_45: *stick to the Doctor's forehead*
[08:01] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhahahahaaaaaa
[08:01] snowgrouse: "This little Time Lord went to the market..."
[08:01] eugenia_45: Hahahaha
[08:01] eugenia_45: This little Timey went home, this little Timey had roast beef and this little Timey BLEW UP GALLIFRRRRRRREYYYYY!
[08:02] snowgrouse: YES
[08:02] snowgrouse: "Oh, and this little Time Lord ran to the end of the universe. See how easy it is to recognise him by his GIANT COCK?" *waves hugely endowed Jelly Timey in front of Ten's nose*
[08:03] eugenia_45: Hee
[08:04] snowgrouse: and then the Master makes the jelly Master fuck the jelly Doctor.
[08:04] snowgrouse: with ridiculously OTT, loud noises.
[08:04] eugenia_45: Spits on jelly Doctor.
[08:04] eugenia_45: "Lube."
[08:04] snowgrouse: ILU
[08:04] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:05] snowgrouse: "ah, ah, virgin tight, just like prom night!"
[08:05] eugenia_45: And then goes through the whole pile of boobular jelly companions.
[08:05] eugenia_45: "Wait your turn, ladies. There's plenty of me to go around." unf unf unf
[08:06] snowgrouse: needs extra jelly for Donna's boobs and Rose's jaw.
[08:07] snowgrouse: I just imagined the Master just eventually grabbing a handful and wanking with them ;__;
[08:07] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:08] eugenia_45: He should just go Scrooge McDuck and dive naked into a pool of jelly babies shaped like companions.
[08:08] snowgrouse: that'd have to be a blow-up kiddy pool.
[08:09] eugenia_45: And just keep humpin' until he disappears under them.
[08:09] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhahahahaaaaaaa
[08:09] snowgrouse: and it all turns into a big vat of jelly.
[08:09] snowgrouse: And he pulls the Doctor in for a wrestle.
[08:09] eugenia_45: Ah, warm liquid goo phase.
[08:09] snowgrouse: yes.
[08:09] snowgrouse: he finds this erotic.
[08:10] snowgrouse: and just wrestles the Doctor down and fucks him with the remains of Adric, Nyssa, Susan and Mel for lube.
[08:11] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:11] snowgrouse: the Doctor limp and sobbing, face smeared with Jamie and Liz and Jo and Vicki.
[08:12] snowgrouse: ah, true love.
[08:12] snowgrouse: "An orgy with all of your precious companions! It's what you've always wanted, Doctor!"
[08:12] snowgrouse: *PacMaster face, hump hump unf unf spluff spluff*
[08:13] eugenia_45: hehehe
[08:13] snowgrouse: Happy ending.
[07:31] snowgrouse: *sigh* I do get a sort of perverse joy from making Dave suck cock.
[07:32] eugenia_45: Well, wif a mouf like that...
[07:32] snowgrouse: made for it, man.
[07:32] snowgrouse: Made for it.
[07:32] eugenia_45: That damned bottom lip... I see it and I want to bite it.
[07:32] snowgrouse: He's so oral.
[07:32] snowgrouse: yes.
[07:33] snowgrouse: especially on twink!Dave.
[07:33] eugenia_45: It's huuuge.
[07:33] eugenia_45: Yeah, damn.
[07:33] snowgrouse: red like flushed naughty bits!
[07:33] snowgrouse: He just needs to do porn.
[07:33] snowgrouse: Was just watching a flick where a dude kept on sucking another after the top had come in his mouth. And kept fucking dribbling the come out and wanking the guy still, and his hand was wet too... it was all wet and sticky and messy and UNF
[07:34] snowgrouse: and that was some fucking hot dribbling, not "ew, ptui" dribbling.
[07:34] eugenia_45: unf
[07:34] snowgrouse: Dave needs to do that. Imagine that mouth wide open. Just dripping.
[07:34] snowgrouse: spit and come. Please.
[07:35] snowgrouse: looking up with those big sad eyes.
[07:35] snowgrouse: unf, I say. UNF.
[07:35] eugenia_45: *shakes fist*
[07:35] eugenia_45: Damn you, Tennant. Do porn.
[07:36] snowgrouse: now.
[07:36] snowgrouse: I mean, all of the bits where he noms something, in Blackpool, Who, Secret Smile...
[07:36] eugenia_45: Seriously. I don't care what he noms so long as he noms something.
[07:37] eugenia_45: Even just someone's fingers, I'd be very happy with.
[07:37] snowgrouse: guh, fuck, yes.
[07:38] snowgrouse: Please, just... give him a scene where Ten gets gagged by the Master. The Master stuffing his tie into his mouth. Anything.
[07:38] snowgrouse: it's not like we can expect gagging with cocks, so... please.
[07:39] eugenia_45: Yes. A little Master thuggery would be lovely.
[07:39] eugenia_45: A quick jab to the stomach, shoving his tie down his throat, spinning him around, shoving him to the ground and kneeling on his back as the Master wrenches the Doctor's arms behind him. "Hi honey, I'm home."
[07:40] snowgrouse: YOU MAKE ME CRY.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Ha!
[07:40] snowgrouse: *sob* want.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Please.
[07:40] snowgrouse: My faps have had so much arm-wrenching imagery recently.
[07:40] eugenia_45: Or at the very least, an outtake where Dave snogs John all romance novel cover-y.
[07:40] snowgrouse: YES
[07:41] snowgrouse: for all we know, one exists already but wasn't ever released.
[07:42] eugenia_45: Is in RTD's special fapvault.
[07:42] snowgrouse: would be great for Dave to just grab John and dip him like they were dancing and lean over and kiss him OTT-tenderly.
[07:42] eugenia_45: Hahaha
[07:42] snowgrouse: you spin me right round baby right round
[07:42] snowgrouse: and yes, Rusty has all of that on tape:(
[07:42] eugenia_45: I want some Gomez and Morticia Addams kissing.
[07:43] snowgrouse: YES
[07:43] snowgrouse: That's the way they'd dance.
[07:44] snowgrouse: I want to shop this.
[07:45] snowgrouse: Especially since Master with a rose between his teeth=guaranteed way to make Ten sob in Rose emo.
[07:45] eugenia_45: Hahahaha
[07:45] eugenia_45: wose wubeded woses
[07:45] snowgrouse: ahahahahaaaaaa
[07:45] snowgrouse: okay, a daisy between his teefs, then.
[07:46] eugenia_45: Aww
[07:46] eugenia_45: That'll just make him go "waaaaah gallifwey!"
[07:46] snowgrouse: The Master knows which buttons to push.
[07:46] snowgrouse: which is beautiful.
[07:47] eugenia_45: I want a whole episode of the Master taunting him about Gallifrey some more.
[07:47] eugenia_45: In various comical forms.
[07:47] snowgrouse: ahahahahaaaaaaa
[07:47] snowgrouse: dancing in a red grass skirt.
[07:48] eugenia_45: Just like finding an open wound and digging his thumb in.
[07:48] snowgrouse: that should not sound sexy.
[07:48] eugenia_45: That's way more fun than making new wounds. Less effort too.
[07:48] snowgrouse: Yeah.
[07:48] snowgrouse: plus, once the Doctor becomes sensitised to the Gallifrey emos, the Master will have effectively healed him!
[07:49] snowgrouse: which can only be a good thing and he can start torturing the Doctor some more.
[07:49] eugenia_45: Hee
[07:49] snowgrouse: <3
[07:49] snowgrouse: shock therapy, man.
[07:49] snowgrouse: and, well, aversion therapy.
[07:49] snowgrouse: both in one.
[07:50] snowgrouse: Master doing a striptease performance with the full Timey regalia.
[07:50] eugenia_45: Ahahahahaha
[07:50] snowgrouse: The Full Rassilon.
[07:51] eugenia_45: Must play The Stripper while doing it, too.
[07:52] snowgrouse: YES
[07:52] snowgrouse: must.
[07:52] eugenia_45: Is lovely musical crack.
[07:53] snowgrouse: is.
[07:53] snowgrouse: what else?
[07:53] snowgrouse: how can he manifest twin suns?
[07:53] snowgrouse: Sticking two lights up his arse and mooning the Doctor?
[07:53] snowgrouse: Mangina-stylee?
[07:53] eugenia_45: Bra. With headlights on 'em.
[07:54] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhahahahaaaaaaa
[07:54] snowgrouse: silver trees=spraypainting his cock silver.
[07:54] eugenia_45: Or just paint his balls with fluorescent paint and stand on a chair and wiggle about.
[07:54] snowgrouse: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA
[07:54] snowgrouse: *ded*
[07:55] eugenia_45: Playing a little Here Comes the Sun.
[07:55] snowgrouse: *throws things at you*
[07:55] eugenia_45: *blows up your home planet*
[07:55] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhahahaaaa
[07:55] snowgrouse: Beautiful.
[07:56] snowgrouse: I imagine him building a big miniature set of Gallifrey and the surrounding systems.
[07:56] eugenia_45: Awww.
[07:56] eugenia_45: And then FIREWORKS TIME
[07:56] snowgrouse: YES
[07:57] snowgrouse: like a big fuckoff orrery or something.
[07:57] eugenia_45: Or they could just be pinatas and he prances around whacking Gallifrey with a baseball bat while blindfolded.
[07:57] snowgrouse: sending all the planets spinning around and with fireworks like some gigantic system of Catherine wheels.
[07:57] eugenia_45: And it's filled with jelly babies!
[07:57] snowgrouse: AHAHAHAHA
[07:57] snowgrouse: yes.
[07:59] snowgrouse: and all the jelly babies are cast in wee Time Lord shapes.
[07:59] eugenia_45: Bite their heads off!
[07:59] snowgrouse: "Oh, look, a red one! That's Romana! *chomp*"
[07:59] snowgrouse: YES
[08:00] snowgrouse: "and that's your brother! The green ones taste like shit anyway." *spits it out*
[08:00] eugenia_45: "Oh look, this one has pinstripes!" *LIIIIICK*
[08:01] eugenia_45: *stick to the Doctor's forehead*
[08:01] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhahahahaaaaaa
[08:01] snowgrouse: "This little Time Lord went to the market..."
[08:01] eugenia_45: Hahahaha
[08:01] eugenia_45: This little Timey went home, this little Timey had roast beef and this little Timey BLEW UP GALLIFRRRRRRREYYYYY!
[08:02] snowgrouse: YES
[08:02] snowgrouse: "Oh, and this little Time Lord ran to the end of the universe. See how easy it is to recognise him by his GIANT COCK?" *waves hugely endowed Jelly Timey in front of Ten's nose*
[08:03] eugenia_45: Hee
[08:04] snowgrouse: and then the Master makes the jelly Master fuck the jelly Doctor.
[08:04] snowgrouse: with ridiculously OTT, loud noises.
[08:04] eugenia_45: Spits on jelly Doctor.
[08:04] eugenia_45: "Lube."
[08:04] snowgrouse: ILU
[08:04] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:05] snowgrouse: "ah, ah, virgin tight, just like prom night!"
[08:05] eugenia_45: And then goes through the whole pile of boobular jelly companions.
[08:05] eugenia_45: "Wait your turn, ladies. There's plenty of me to go around." unf unf unf
[08:06] snowgrouse: needs extra jelly for Donna's boobs and Rose's jaw.
[08:07] snowgrouse: I just imagined the Master just eventually grabbing a handful and wanking with them ;__;
[08:07] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:08] eugenia_45: He should just go Scrooge McDuck and dive naked into a pool of jelly babies shaped like companions.
[08:08] snowgrouse: that'd have to be a blow-up kiddy pool.
[08:09] eugenia_45: And just keep humpin' until he disappears under them.
[08:09] snowgrouse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhahahahaaaaaaa
[08:09] snowgrouse: and it all turns into a big vat of jelly.
[08:09] snowgrouse: And he pulls the Doctor in for a wrestle.
[08:09] eugenia_45: Ah, warm liquid goo phase.
[08:09] snowgrouse: yes.
[08:09] snowgrouse: he finds this erotic.
[08:10] snowgrouse: and just wrestles the Doctor down and fucks him with the remains of Adric, Nyssa, Susan and Mel for lube.
[08:11] eugenia_45: Haha
[08:11] snowgrouse: the Doctor limp and sobbing, face smeared with Jamie and Liz and Jo and Vicki.
[08:12] snowgrouse: ah, true love.
[08:12] snowgrouse: "An orgy with all of your precious companions! It's what you've always wanted, Doctor!"
[08:12] snowgrouse: *PacMaster face, hump hump unf unf spluff spluff*
[08:13] eugenia_45: hehehe
[08:13] snowgrouse: Happy ending.