The Comprehensive Naked Time Lord Post (NSFW)
Ok, I'm saying "comprehensive", but I'm going to focus on Tennant and Simm here. Because it seems that some fanficcers and some fan artists still seem to be operating under the illusion that the guys have washboard stomachs or bulging muscles. It's such an old fan cliche that it's a bit silly to see that happening, even in this day and age. It happens in EVERY fandom, but in Brit fandoms where you get actors who actually look like humans instead of Ken dolls, it's even more grating. As a manipper myself, I know that a hell of a lot of interesting porny pics have dudes that are WAY more muscular than our Skinny Tortured Brits(TM), but it's *still* not an excuse. It's not like you have to get them *exactly* right (fuck knows I could never do a single manip if they had to be 100% perfect matches), but at least accept the fact that these dudes aren't buff. Please. Saying "it's a fantasy!" doesn't really help if the guy's just unrecognisable from the neck down--surely you want the viewer's first reaction to be "Wow, Ten doing naked yoga in zero gravity" and not "...What the fuck, that isn't right"? Yes? Yes. Thought so.
So. It's about time for some REFERENCE PICS. In the name of porn SKIENZE.
We'll start with a classic. Yes, Dave And The Helmet. Click to embiggen. Well, I say "embiggen", but, y'know.
Skinny. Skinny, skinny, skinny, with surprisingly muscular thighs.
And a third from he same play--his shoulders and arms really are quite nice and not as narrow as you'd expect. He's not a *complete* stick insect in that regard. Yet he's not hyper-hulky, which is of the good.
And fukkit, this one, because it's a thighgasm:
And if you don't want to go with Nineties pix, here are a few more recent ones:
Hel-lo, Casanova. I don't know what happened after the Nineties, but he seemed to develop more hair on his chest in his thirties. And just the right amount. Again, lovely shoulders.
And oh look, reference photos of UNFing! If that's not inspiring, I don't know what is. (Insert appropriate Dave Noises, such as NGH, TGAH and NGAH here.)
HARDER PLZ.
Oh yeah. (Note the hand cream on the bedside table for added innuendo.)
I'm sorry, but I have to include this. Mostly for the lols. And his hairier-than-a-satyr thighs.
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And lastly, paparazzis have this magic skill of making just about anyone look horrible. But then that's not really a flattering pose, if you're a skinny bugger. This should help in driving home the point of how he really, really isn't a tanned muscular hunky type. (And thank fuck for that. I'd take a pale bony Brit over a Playgirl centrefold any day .)
Aaand onto John. Let's start with a clothed full-body shot to show you just how skinny his thighs and legs are (far skinnier than Dave's):
A:DSLKHASD, I WILL GET TO THE NAKED PIX IN A MINUTE BUT OMG BONY THIGHS. AND THE ANGSTY RPS TIMEY LOVE.
Funnily enough, John's face has certainly changed but his body hasn't, not that much. Some early/mid 90s twink caps:
He's certainly got smaller shoulders than Dave. And less chest hair.
Mm, nice angle.
O HAI.
Super-skinny arms. Yes, those were what I was looking at in this pic. Shush.
Yes please.
And you bet I've tried to get a clearer cap of this. It just isn't happening.
But if we can't get a closer look at him from the front, at least there's Miranda. For the lingering ARSE CLOSEUP.
And yes, yes, everyone's seen these, but I'm going to post them anyway.
There. Happy now?
MOAR THIGHS.
Okay, fuckit, have a few more bonus Doctors and Masters:
Shirtless Fivey
Shirtless Roger Delgado
Seventies Porn Colin (shutit, you saw that one coming a mile away).
I'd post Sylv in his pants or Colin in drag but I'm not a complete sadist. Plus, you've seen 'em all anyway.
But, er, hope this was helpful and so on. I could be here all day preaching how much more attractive normal-looking humans are and why British telly pwns in that respect, but I'll stop here.
So. It's about time for some REFERENCE PICS. In the name of porn SKIENZE.
We'll start with a classic. Yes, Dave And The Helmet. Click to embiggen. Well, I say "embiggen", but, y'know.
Skinny. Skinny, skinny, skinny, with surprisingly muscular thighs.
And a third from he same play--his shoulders and arms really are quite nice and not as narrow as you'd expect. He's not a *complete* stick insect in that regard. Yet he's not hyper-hulky, which is of the good.
And fukkit, this one, because it's a thighgasm:
And if you don't want to go with Nineties pix, here are a few more recent ones:
Hel-lo, Casanova. I don't know what happened after the Nineties, but he seemed to develop more hair on his chest in his thirties. And just the right amount. Again, lovely shoulders.
And oh look, reference photos of UNFing! If that's not inspiring, I don't know what is. (Insert appropriate Dave Noises, such as NGH, TGAH and NGAH here.)
HARDER PLZ.
Oh yeah. (Note the hand cream on the bedside table for added innuendo.)
I'm sorry, but I have to include this. Mostly for the lols. And his hairier-than-a-satyr thighs.
And lastly, paparazzis have this magic skill of making just about anyone look horrible. But then that's not really a flattering pose, if you're a skinny bugger. This should help in driving home the point of how he really, really isn't a tanned muscular hunky type. (And thank fuck for that. I'd take a pale bony Brit over a Playgirl centrefold any day .)
Aaand onto John. Let's start with a clothed full-body shot to show you just how skinny his thighs and legs are (far skinnier than Dave's):
A:DSLKHASD, I WILL GET TO THE NAKED PIX IN A MINUTE BUT OMG BONY THIGHS. AND THE ANGSTY RPS TIMEY LOVE.
Funnily enough, John's face has certainly changed but his body hasn't, not that much. Some early/mid 90s twink caps:
He's certainly got smaller shoulders than Dave. And less chest hair.
Mm, nice angle.
O HAI.
Super-skinny arms. Yes, those were what I was looking at in this pic. Shush.
Yes please.
And you bet I've tried to get a clearer cap of this. It just isn't happening.
But if we can't get a closer look at him from the front, at least there's Miranda. For the lingering ARSE CLOSEUP.
And yes, yes, everyone's seen these, but I'm going to post them anyway.
There. Happy now?
MOAR THIGHS.
Okay, fuckit, have a few more bonus Doctors and Masters:
Shirtless Fivey
Shirtless Roger Delgado
Seventies Porn Colin (shutit, you saw that one coming a mile away).
I'd post Sylv in his pants or Colin in drag but I'm not a complete sadist. Plus, you've seen 'em all anyway.
But, er, hope this was helpful and so on. I could be here all day preaching how much more attractive normal-looking humans are and why British telly pwns in that respect, but I'll stop here.