who could ask for anymore?
Mad As Rabbits is growing on me.
Today was really awesome (: We spent like, what, five hours at the Botanic Garden? Then like, three more at Sakae Sushi for their afternoon buffet, and it - was really the most fun I remember having for a while. I'm not sure, somehow times are - more peaceful now? I'm not sure if it's the departure of certain things, or having found a firmer consensus with life itself, but things are more settled. There's a routine, sort of.
Maybe it's the working-towards-a-goal part which makes things easier; life is always easier with a goal, some meaning, no matter how small or technical. The heartaches these days are mundane in their worries.
Of course, a lot of it's really Gee&Liz (yes, they're totally one entity now; they look like a brand, don't they? :D) I feel like we're achieved some kind of accord (if I'm sounding like some psuedo-profound freak, it's because I read Hegel this morning, and he writes - really weird, abstract things like, If consciousness seeks negation, but not for it as a being-for-others but rather for itself as a being-for-itself because only through death can absolute freedom be achieved and yet simultaneously disintegrated by the finality of that act and yes, I totally made that up but that's because my book is outside and I'm too lazy to go get it; you get the idea, yes?) gradually; again, a settling of sorts, and it's better than ever, comforting. As much as I (was) worry(ing) about familiarity breeding contempt and all, I do know that there is a reason why we've lasted so long (ohmygod I totally sound like we're in this non-platonic!threesome O: ) all these years when (arguably, it could be said that) people have come and go (all those interludes were just that? Is it even fair for me to say that?). I think it's solid, or at least, more solid than anything else I have ever had - and sometimes that's what scares me? That the solidity will lead to complacency, and then crumble. It is a legitimate fear (admittedly compounded by massive fic reading; mea culpa!) although not very likely. Like Liz said, if I haven't gotten tired of them after seven (and two) years, I probably won't.
- I was going to type something totally stupid and like, Taylor Swift (ew!) here but I decided against it. I ACTUALLY HAVE AN EMAIL FOLDER IN MY GMAIL ACCOUNT NAMED GEE. And before you complain, Liz, if you'd actually like, check your mail, and reply and all, you'll probably have one too. I bet you haven't even downloaded MSN yet, seriously.
Also, it feels kind of awesome to be disciplined enough that you can let yourself watch Supernatural episodes sometimes and not feel guilty. Not that I'm, you know, suddenly Captain Discipline! I'm just saying. Making progress (:
Just read a couple of awesome fics. I - surprisingly, I am ready for the week to start. Maybe it's today. Maybe it's French. Maybe it's - I just feel really lucky, lucky to be alive (Supernatural does that to you sometimes :))
Today was really awesome (: We spent like, what, five hours at the Botanic Garden? Then like, three more at Sakae Sushi for their afternoon buffet, and it - was really the most fun I remember having for a while. I'm not sure, somehow times are - more peaceful now? I'm not sure if it's the departure of certain things, or having found a firmer consensus with life itself, but things are more settled. There's a routine, sort of.
Maybe it's the working-towards-a-goal part which makes things easier; life is always easier with a goal, some meaning, no matter how small or technical. The heartaches these days are mundane in their worries.
Of course, a lot of it's really Gee&Liz (yes, they're totally one entity now; they look like a brand, don't they? :D) I feel like we're achieved some kind of accord (if I'm sounding like some psuedo-profound freak, it's because I read Hegel this morning, and he writes - really weird, abstract things like, If consciousness seeks negation, but not for it as a being-for-others but rather for itself as a being-for-itself because only through death can absolute freedom be achieved and yet simultaneously disintegrated by the finality of that act and yes, I totally made that up but that's because my book is outside and I'm too lazy to go get it; you get the idea, yes?) gradually; again, a settling of sorts, and it's better than ever, comforting. As much as I (was) worry(ing) about familiarity breeding contempt and all, I do know that there is a reason why we've lasted so long (ohmygod I totally sound like we're in this non-platonic!threesome O: ) all these years when (arguably, it could be said that) people have come and go (all those interludes were just that? Is it even fair for me to say that?). I think it's solid, or at least, more solid than anything else I have ever had - and sometimes that's what scares me? That the solidity will lead to complacency, and then crumble. It is a legitimate fear (admittedly compounded by massive fic reading; mea culpa!) although not very likely. Like Liz said, if I haven't gotten tired of them after seven (and two) years, I probably won't.
- I was going to type something totally stupid and like, Taylor Swift (ew!) here but I decided against it. I ACTUALLY HAVE AN EMAIL FOLDER IN MY GMAIL ACCOUNT NAMED GEE. And before you complain, Liz, if you'd actually like, check your mail, and reply and all, you'll probably have one too. I bet you haven't even downloaded MSN yet, seriously.
Also, it feels kind of awesome to be disciplined enough that you can let yourself watch Supernatural episodes sometimes and not feel guilty. Not that I'm, you know, suddenly Captain Discipline! I'm just saying. Making progress (:
Just read a couple of awesome fics. I - surprisingly, I am ready for the week to start. Maybe it's today. Maybe it's French. Maybe it's - I just feel really lucky, lucky to be alive (Supernatural does that to you sometimes :))