The one where I espouse all the wonderful qualitites of my gym...
1. I can get there, get a great workout in, and get back before an episode of Star Trek: TNG has finished.
2. The music (a strange congolomeration of remixed songs desinged to "inspire") is kept at a costant 140 beats
per minute, preventing the clumsy among us from losing our ryhthm.
3. It plays, very underhandedly, on my need to fufill contractual obligations. Namely, when I signed the
contract before paying in full (Yay! student discount) part of the contract stated that I would commit
myself to a minimum of three 30 minute workouts a week. Now, while abstractly I know that the employees
aren't going to hunt me down if I fail to show up for my workouts, I still feel like I've let them (and the
cute computer that tracks my arrivals) down.
4. I suffer from a rare condition which shall be referred to as "extreme bouts of machoism when allowed to
control the weight settings on workout machines." What does this mean? It means that at normal gyms, I have
a tendency to set the weight limit as high as it can go without me tearing a tendon. Not such a bad
technique if you are a guy looking to bulk-up on muscle. Not so good though if you are girl looking to tone
and be svelte (fun word). These machines allow no adjustment as they are resistence based.
5. 30 seconds per station, alternating between aerobic squares and circuit machines, two complete circuits,
followed by a cool down stretch. Very clutz proof.
6. The employees take an active role in your progress and due monthly measurements and will determine your body fat
percentage to see what kind of progress you're making if you want.
7. They haven't ripped me off for $75 like Lucille Roberts did. (Two freakin' years with that gym and
they can't refund me $75 cause I moved and didn't cancel my contract, since it was ending soon, and those
bastards RENEWED it without my consent!!)
So, yeah. I like my gym.