Wisconsin's raging weiner problem
It hasn't been even a month since the Oscar Meyer Wiener-mobile smashed into the front of a home in Racine, and now there's another huge news story about a Wisconsin wiener raging out of control. A guy's wife finds out he's been cheating on her with at least five other women and decides to get revenge. She teams up with three of the dude's mistresses, also highly pissed individuals, and has one of them lure him to a motel for a massage. She gets him on the bed, he allows her to tie him up, and then the other ladies come in and thump him for a while. Then, as a finishing touch, the wife takes a bottle of Krazy Glue (TM) and plasters the offending wee-wee to his belly.
Obviously, the guy's a schmuck and a cad, so he deserved some kind of comeuppance (snicker). But there might be some jr. cads out there who think to themselves, "Hey, you gotta hand it to this guy . . . he made it with a pretty good number of wimmins." Here's where the story takes a scary turn: quantity does not equal quality. Do click here to see the true news story, and, more importantly, the pictures of these scorned ladies.
Holy fucking shit. When I saw these pictures, I was reminded of the old Carlin line, "I never fucked a 10, but one night I fucked 5 twos." Maybe this guy was a fan. He certainly was a fan of women who's faces can curdle milk. Or maybe he never paid his light bill, I don't know. I know that these pictures were taken with the unforgiving mug-shot camera, but even Glamor Shots at the top of their game couldn't shine these pennys. There's not enough feather boas or Vaseline-smeared lenses in the world to mitigate the ugly going on here. And what's even more amazing, when you scroll down to take a gander at the wife, you realize that he was actually trading up! I'll say it again, holy fucking shit! And I'll quote Carlin again, "I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick."
I realize that beauty is on the inside and that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, not even a book entitled The Hoary Hags of the Upper Midwest. But c'mon, buddy . . . if that's the best you can do with your schlong, the Krazy Glue (TM) therapy is doing you a favor. It's bad enough you have no scruples, but for pete's sake at least have some standards.
Obviously, the guy's a schmuck and a cad, so he deserved some kind of comeuppance (snicker). But there might be some jr. cads out there who think to themselves, "Hey, you gotta hand it to this guy . . . he made it with a pretty good number of wimmins." Here's where the story takes a scary turn: quantity does not equal quality. Do click here to see the true news story, and, more importantly, the pictures of these scorned ladies.
Holy fucking shit. When I saw these pictures, I was reminded of the old Carlin line, "I never fucked a 10, but one night I fucked 5 twos." Maybe this guy was a fan. He certainly was a fan of women who's faces can curdle milk. Or maybe he never paid his light bill, I don't know. I know that these pictures were taken with the unforgiving mug-shot camera, but even Glamor Shots at the top of their game couldn't shine these pennys. There's not enough feather boas or Vaseline-smeared lenses in the world to mitigate the ugly going on here. And what's even more amazing, when you scroll down to take a gander at the wife, you realize that he was actually trading up! I'll say it again, holy fucking shit! And I'll quote Carlin again, "I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick."
I realize that beauty is on the inside and that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, not even a book entitled The Hoary Hags of the Upper Midwest. But c'mon, buddy . . . if that's the best you can do with your schlong, the Krazy Glue (TM) therapy is doing you a favor. It's bad enough you have no scruples, but for pete's sake at least have some standards.