text

[slenderbot]

QUERY: Why is the population fascinated with reproduction?

CURRENT ENVIRONMENT NOT IDEAL FOR PROCREATION.

SUGGESTION: REFRAIN.

[ Certainly this recent quality on the network isn't improving his opinion on meatbags organics. ]

Comments

AUDIO;

[allshock_notalk]

DEPENDS ON POPULATION.

text

[slenderbot]

[ Hello Alternate Me. About time. He'll be civil for now. ]

AUDIO ID: Soundwave.

EXPECTED AS MUCH.

AUDIO;

[allshock_notalk]

AFFIRMATIVE.

VERIFY EXPECTED POPULATION.

text

[slenderbot]

ORGANIC.

[ He's still trying to decide if you, Shockwave, and Skyfire count in that. Rumor is, you're all sluts. ]

text;

[selfkismesis]

FUCK YOUR SUGGESTIONS.

text;

[slenderbot]

. . .

ACKNOWLEDGED.
//file transfer: PARENTING101.pdf

[ Have a book on baby care, Karkat. ]

text;

[selfkismesis]

-- carcinoGeneticist [cG] rejected file "PARENTING101.pfd". --

NOPE.
STILL FUCKING YOUR SUGGESTIONS.
IN A CONSTANT STATE OF FUCK YOU
FUCK YOUR SUGGESTIONS
AND NOPE.
IT'S A DANGEROUS CYCLE TO BE CAUGHT IN, BUT I LAUGH IN THE FACE OF DANGER.
HA HA.

text;

[slenderbot]

[ You are a strange, simple thing... ]

ACKNOWLEDGED.
YOU WISH TO REMAIN MISINFORMED.

[reunified]

Because half the population of the station is under the age of 18. Kids are generally fascinated with that sort of thing.

text

[slenderbot]

SEEMS ILLOGICAL.

AUDIO ID: ALTMAN, MICHAEL.
HELLO.

video

[reunified]

It's a topic usually frowned upon discussing with children, so it's automatically interesting to them. Or... confusing and weird.

text

[slenderbot]

ORGANIC MODESTY OFTEN ILLOGICAL.
INFORMATION WOULD LIMIT CONFUSION.

[ you guys are all assbackwards ]

[Voice | Piggyback encryption]

[knight4darkness]

...so you do know how to actually start a conversation.

['sup, mr. wake-you-up-from-a-nightmare-in-the-worst-way-possible.]

text | encrypted

[slenderbot]

[ Oh, so you do know how to say other things than curses. ]

SPEECH: OFTEN UNNECESSARY.

STATUS: INJURIES?

[ He's not asking out of concern. He's being a jerk. ]

permavoice/crypt unless noted

[knight4darkness]

I've recovered.

[he's managing to keep the suspicion out, but he does still sound awful flat. y u ask?]

'cypt unless noted/font will show the switch, k

[slenderbot]

GOOD.

[ Can't have such a valuable treasure of information remain damaged. ]

`Unicron did worse.` [ Sound familiar? ]

audio;

[namesnotprowl]

It's an organic hormone chemical thing. I doubt you'd understand.

text

[slenderbot]

[ Yeah, to be fair. He is kinda baffled. ]

CONDITIONS SHOULD DISSUADE.

[ Primus, non-sentient earth animals seem smarter than him right now. At least they pay attention to things like good breeding conditions to care about sex. ]

audio;

[namesnotprowl]

It ain't always done for reproductive purposes, you realize.

[This is pretty much the only thing he'll willingly try to explain to Soundwave. He better enjoy it.]

text

[slenderbot]

A WASTE OF RESOURCES.

[ And to think, some time ago he used to enjoy interfacing. ]