Stansen Legacy 1.1
~60 pictures with a smidgen of bad words.
Here it is, the new legacy! I've got to be honest, I don't really know how often I'll be updating - summer school's starting, and Comic Con's coming up, and I'm just not in as ZOMG SIMS a mood as I was before. Regardless, I give you... The Stansen Legacy!
Bernice Stansen
Romance / Family
LTW: Become Hall of Famer
OTH: Music & dance
3 Sloppy / 8 Outgoing / 5 Active / 3 Serious / 6 Grouchy
Turn-Ons/Off: Charismatic & Formal Wear / Grey Hair
Our story takes place in the adorable town of Elsewhere. I'm starting Bernice off in an apartment, as I've never actually played one before.
Bernice gets right down to meeting her new neighbors.
Bernice: Hey, Red, you can look all you want, but it's gonna cost you if you want to touch!
Bernice: WUT DO YOU MEAN, PROSTITUTION IS ILLEGAL?!
Bernice's rather fugly all-female welcome wagon arrives.
I had her ditch the fugs and go across the street to the bakery, where she immediately bumped into Daniel here. Apparently that outfit must be some kind of trend.
Bernice: Finguh painting is mah favorite; it's just so relaxing and freeing and BLAHBLAHBLAH...
Daniel: Boooooobs.
Daniel apparently decided that Bernice was hotter than she was boring, and so they sat down in the middle of the bakery to hang out and block traffic.
Time for some food and an awkward exchange of glances with the guy who thinks Bernice is a prostitute! (Has anyone ever made a prostitute NPC? That would be epically awesome.)
Cleaning up after youself, hmm? What is this, Panera?
Heeey, look, the Unsavory Charlatan! I've never seen one of those before.
Daniel: Look, Chickie, I'd love for you to stop by some time, but don't try secretly moving in on me, okay? I promised myself after the last 3 times that I wouldn't fall for that old trick again!
Bernice left the weather channel on, and thus, these kept popping up every Sim hour or so.
Again.
And AGAIN.
This is Bernice's landlord. I'm really not sure how effective that rake is on that small scattering of leaves, lady.
Bernice: Mah landlord, wut a hobag!
Bernice's advances are well-received, so I'm assuming that gossip about elderly hunchbacks is a turn-on for Daniel.
Daniel: I is so discreet, I bet she can't even tell that I'm using mah X-ray vision to discern whether or not teh curtains match teh drapes!
Daniel accepted Bernice's date proposal, and the very same time, the fucking weatherman made another appearance and Bernice found her OTH.
That music & dance activity, by the way, was slow dancing in silence.
These two are obviously already very comfortable with each other.
A little old-fashioned, to be sure, but Bernice is determined to impress her date with a home-cooked meal.
Or, you know, just make enough for one and gulp it down like a wild animal.
Apparently going hungry wasn't enough to deter Daniel.
And the date's not over yet! Daniel does some warm-ups.
You know, so he doesn't pull anything during the main event. Though you might squish your date, Danny boy.
I'm not really sure how they woohoo'd, giving the position of Bernice's legs, but they did. (Anal, maybe?)
Will someone please turn off the frakking TV already?
OOOH THAT'S SO FUNNY I FORGOT TO LAUGH. [/third-grade cliché]
Daniel left Bernice some flowers and a note. And didn't even wait 3 days. What a sap.
Sometimes, though, a little sappy gets results!
Bernice still eats like a pig and apparently has cheese puff balls flying off her fork, but at least she made two plates this time.
Daniel: Fact: My cock is harder than a brick of gold!
That's right, hit it and quit it!
Bernice finally finds a job in her LTW field.
Poor thing woke up with a crick in her neck, though.
I know how to fix that! Work that body! I won't have any founder of mine not having the required skills for a promotion her first day!
Outing? But... it was at her house! And you already bought her flowers! Erm, gee, Dan, you're great, but maybe it's time to see other people. Suffocating and whatnot, you know.
Bernice dreams soundly about marrying (and divorcing) rich so she'll never have to work again.
However, this dream is suddenly interrupted when...
POP!
Bernice: *deflates spare tire slightly*
Bernice: You know, Red, just because I've put on a few pounds doesn't mean I can't be a prostitute...
She promptly forgot all about Red when this guy walked by, though. The romance/family combo requires that Bernice have lots of BBs, but also lots and lots of BB daddies.
The mailman was also kind of cute, so I had Bernice talk to him, as well. Just because she's pregnant doesn't mean she doesn't have needs! It's true; I saw it on 16 and Pregnant.
Bernice: If you want to go out some time, just stop by! YOU KNOW MY ADDRESS LOL ROFL!
What? Just because she's knocked up doesn't mean she shouldn't be doing intense sit-up regiments to get that promotion!
Bernice is the resident swing-pusher, mostly just for this lady doctor. Though the lady doctor's obsession with the swings combined with her choice of hair accessory makes me wonder if she's really a doctor or just plays one on TV in her alternate-reality fantasy world.
Wow, so the landlord fixes broken stuff for you, free of charge? SWEET!
Pop! The ugly fuchsia pajamas strike again!
Bernice: So, Edward, I'd love to go out with you, cause your penis to rise and love you long time!
Edward: I'll tell you what I'm gonna do: I'm gonna send a sexy little dress over to your apartment. When you can fit into it, give me a call.
Whaaat? Seems kind of soon.
Oh, right, Inteenimater and it's realism.
Though after changing her clothes and fixing her hair (which seems to happen ever since I got Inteen), it turned out it was baby tiem anyway.
That's all for now! Thanks for reading, and please comment!