A Welsh Holiday, or, Jack and Ianto Tackle the Plumbing 4/7
Chapter 4 - Ikea Plays Agony Aunt
Ianto found Jack in Accessories, standing under the florescent lighting and poking angrily at what, if one was kind, could be considered a twisted vase. If one was high on drugs, that is. Damn Swedes and their design. Jack must have heard Ianto coming, since he suddenly straightened up and refused to even look at Ianto. Ianto took a deep breath and walked over, standing next to Jack and picking up the could-be-a-vase.
“So,” he began, “That didn't go well.”
Jack huffed. “Yeah. I want a relationship and you don't give a damn. First time I've ever been turned down in an Ikea.”
“First time you'd ever been turned down, I suppose,” Ianto said, trying to lighten the mood. He sighed when he saw Jack's expression. “Look, that's not what I meant, ok? You know I don't do well when I'm cornered. It came out wrong.”
“Cornered? We're in Ikea, Ianto, not an interrogation cell.”
“I don't know. You and me, these lights, those colours. Could be a bit terrifying.”
“Ianto,” Jack warned.
“Sorry. Sorry. Look, just...just let me try and say this, ok?” Ianto asked, watching Jack from the corner of his eyes.
Jack nodded stiffly.
“Right. So. You left-”
“Oh just stop right there!” Jack said, turning around and throwing his arms up. “Guy makes one mistake and -”
Ianto wrapped his hand around Jack's mouth. “Stop. Just stop. You said you'd hear me out.”
Jack rolled his eyes and nodded as Ianto removed his hand.
“Right. So. Like I said. You left. And I get it, believe me I do and I'm not angry, trust me. I forgave you a long time ago, just like you forgave me. But still, you left. And part of it was because you wanted to know what you are, and that's fine. But part of it was also because you loved the Doctor and Rose Tyler and were willing to give up everything you had to be with them, right?”
Jack nodded slowly. “Yeah. I guess. So? I came back for you.”
Ianto smiled sadly. “I know you did. You came back. You gave up everything you could have had and came back for me. You flirt with everything with a pulse, Jack, and you may sleep with everyone you meet. I don't know. As long as you're careful and come back, that's all. I'd never ask you to change. But sex...sex and flirting are the easy things, aren't they?”
Jack nodded again.
“You give your body and your words, but you don't give your heart easily, do you?”
Jack just stared at him.
“You loved the Doctor and Rose so much that you were willing to die for them. Then you loved them so much that you, the perpetual wanderer, spend over 100 years waiting for them. You loved me enough to give up the universe, and you loved Owen enough to bring him back from death. Or bring him to death. Keep him dead. Whatever.”
“Ianto-” Jack began.
“No. Wait. Please. I bet you can count the amount of people you've truly loved on two hands. And every time, you've been willing to sacrifice everything - you, your happiness, the world, the adventures of the universe, everything - to be with those people and keep those people.”
“So? I love and I love hard. Where's this going?”
“You love hard, Jack. But for all you know, you're going to live for another million years. I don't want you to bring me back from the dead, Jack. And I certainly don't want you to wait for me, or lock yourself away from anyone else that you could love because I've died, and god help you if you make anyone else live up to me. No one else will be able to make my coffee, so don't even try. Because I will die, Jack. And it'll be soon, knowing Torchwood. And this cottage...” Ianto sighed, rubbing a hand through his hair.
“This cottage has survived for decades, but you stopped coming and locked yourself away. You locked yourself away in the Hub with all those horrible memories, because you couldn't face coming back and the memories that were here. This place should be a comfort for you, Jack. You should be able to come here and be happy, be calm, be comfortable, be soothed, and not see the ghosts of your dead lover in your furniture. It needs to be a place for you, Jack, because this place could be your place instead of just our place.”
Jack turned towards Ianto and wrapped a hand around his neck, petting the soft, downy hair. “You don't want to pick the furniture because you want this to me my safe place, my bolthole?”
Ianto laughed softly. “I have the archives and the kitchen. Owen has the hothouse. Tosh has her computers and Gwen has...well, we'll get Gwen a therapist's sofa. This should be yours, your safe place. Whenever being the Captain gets to be too much, now or in a thousand years, you could go back.”
Jack pulled Ianto in for a tight hug. “Ianto, Ianto, Ianto. Don't you know? I know I'm going to lose you soon. I lose everyone too soon. And this place could be a place for me in the future. But right now, I want to hold on to what I have. And while I have you, I want to have you, furniture and all.”
“You can't let yourself be alone, Jack. You couldn't stand it,” Ianto said against Jack's shoulder.
“I won't be. I promise,” Jack said.
Ianto chuckled. “Promise?” Jack nodded. “Ok then. As lovely as this Hallmark moment is, can we go back to normal now? No more breakdowns?”
“As long as you promise you won't keep acting like you don't care. 'Cause I know you're scared but it's ok.”
Ianto pulled back and stepped away. “Right, well, can we get back to picking out your bed then?”
“Our bed,” Jack emphasized as Ianto shook his head in exasperation. “And I'm not going anywhere till you tell me what you honestly think about that vase,” he said, pointing to the vase still in Jack's hand.
“Um, honestly?” Ianto asked, biting his lip. “I think it's one of the most wretched things I've ever seen.”
“Fantastic!” Jack said, dropping the could-be-a-vase back onto the shelf and steering Ianto back towards the beds. “Now what'd'you say to trying out a bunch of beds with me?”
"That has got to be the best place on Earth!" Jack said, spinning around as he carried bags of household goods to the car. "I mean, seriously! All that stuff under one place! And a restaurant! It's better than ASDA!"
"It's just IKEA, Jack," Ianto said, shaking his head. It was gone five now; no way they were getting any work done on the cottage. At least they'd finally settled on a bed. Ianto'd still refused to pick it, but Jack refused to leave until Ianto at least told him which beds he didn't like. The dark wood on this one complimented both men and seemed sturdy enough for their 'extracurricular' activities. And as much as Ianto wanted to spare Jack the heartache that would come with his eventual death (just his luck, he'd electrocute himself trying to plug the Hoover into the Hub Archive's outdated electrical systems), he was secretly pleased that Jack insisted on getting things Ianto liked. Ianto did have his pride after all, and knowing that some part of him, albeit in the form of a bed, would be with Jack for many, many years and many, many lovers (and wasn't that a disgusting thought), was definitely a self-esteem booster.
"Yeah, but we got everything in one run! It's like going to one of the bazaar days back in Persia. Everything in one street, but with a roof!"
"Felt more like a rat's maze to me," Ianto said laughing as Jack walked backwards into a light pole. He put his bags in the open boot. "And now we've lost a day at the cottage. Everything'll still be waiting for us, bad plumbing and all."
Jack stalked over and slung his bags into the boot. He pushed Ianto up against the car. "Not necessarily," he purred.
"Uu, Jack?" Ianto croaked.
"I promised a working toilet, didn't I?" Jack asked, eyes burning into Ianto's. "And what Jack promises, Jack delivers."
"What?" Ianto swallowed, trying desperately to retain some sort of decency in the middle of the IKEA parking lot. Not that the teenagers in the car five cars down were trying, if the slight rocking was anything to go by, but still. Ianto had standards.
"I hired a plumber and an electrician last night. They were up there today, left me a voicemail saying everything was done. Had to pay through the nose, but again, what I promise, I deliver. Besides, why waste our time on that, when we should be christening every room in the house? Don't think I've forgotten you promised to let me have my way with you."
Jack kissed Ianto, slipping the car keys from his hands and bounding over to the driver's door. "I'm driving!" he called back.
Ianto walked over to the door and poked his head through the open window. "Jack, Sir? Can I have my car back now?"
He swallowed hard when he saw the greedy look in Jack's eyes.
"Nope," he said dangerously. "You've played enough today. I'm in charge. Get in the car."
Ianto found Jack in Accessories, standing under the florescent lighting and poking angrily at what, if one was kind, could be considered a twisted vase. If one was high on drugs, that is. Damn Swedes and their design. Jack must have heard Ianto coming, since he suddenly straightened up and refused to even look at Ianto. Ianto took a deep breath and walked over, standing next to Jack and picking up the could-be-a-vase.
“So,” he began, “That didn't go well.”
Jack huffed. “Yeah. I want a relationship and you don't give a damn. First time I've ever been turned down in an Ikea.”
“First time you'd ever been turned down, I suppose,” Ianto said, trying to lighten the mood. He sighed when he saw Jack's expression. “Look, that's not what I meant, ok? You know I don't do well when I'm cornered. It came out wrong.”
“Cornered? We're in Ikea, Ianto, not an interrogation cell.”
“I don't know. You and me, these lights, those colours. Could be a bit terrifying.”
“Ianto,” Jack warned.
“Sorry. Sorry. Look, just...just let me try and say this, ok?” Ianto asked, watching Jack from the corner of his eyes.
Jack nodded stiffly.
“Right. So. You left-”
“Oh just stop right there!” Jack said, turning around and throwing his arms up. “Guy makes one mistake and -”
Ianto wrapped his hand around Jack's mouth. “Stop. Just stop. You said you'd hear me out.”
Jack rolled his eyes and nodded as Ianto removed his hand.
“Right. So. Like I said. You left. And I get it, believe me I do and I'm not angry, trust me. I forgave you a long time ago, just like you forgave me. But still, you left. And part of it was because you wanted to know what you are, and that's fine. But part of it was also because you loved the Doctor and Rose Tyler and were willing to give up everything you had to be with them, right?”
Jack nodded slowly. “Yeah. I guess. So? I came back for you.”
Ianto smiled sadly. “I know you did. You came back. You gave up everything you could have had and came back for me. You flirt with everything with a pulse, Jack, and you may sleep with everyone you meet. I don't know. As long as you're careful and come back, that's all. I'd never ask you to change. But sex...sex and flirting are the easy things, aren't they?”
Jack nodded again.
“You give your body and your words, but you don't give your heart easily, do you?”
Jack just stared at him.
“You loved the Doctor and Rose so much that you were willing to die for them. Then you loved them so much that you, the perpetual wanderer, spend over 100 years waiting for them. You loved me enough to give up the universe, and you loved Owen enough to bring him back from death. Or bring him to death. Keep him dead. Whatever.”
“Ianto-” Jack began.
“No. Wait. Please. I bet you can count the amount of people you've truly loved on two hands. And every time, you've been willing to sacrifice everything - you, your happiness, the world, the adventures of the universe, everything - to be with those people and keep those people.”
“So? I love and I love hard. Where's this going?”
“You love hard, Jack. But for all you know, you're going to live for another million years. I don't want you to bring me back from the dead, Jack. And I certainly don't want you to wait for me, or lock yourself away from anyone else that you could love because I've died, and god help you if you make anyone else live up to me. No one else will be able to make my coffee, so don't even try. Because I will die, Jack. And it'll be soon, knowing Torchwood. And this cottage...” Ianto sighed, rubbing a hand through his hair.
“This cottage has survived for decades, but you stopped coming and locked yourself away. You locked yourself away in the Hub with all those horrible memories, because you couldn't face coming back and the memories that were here. This place should be a comfort for you, Jack. You should be able to come here and be happy, be calm, be comfortable, be soothed, and not see the ghosts of your dead lover in your furniture. It needs to be a place for you, Jack, because this place could be your place instead of just our place.”
Jack turned towards Ianto and wrapped a hand around his neck, petting the soft, downy hair. “You don't want to pick the furniture because you want this to me my safe place, my bolthole?”
Ianto laughed softly. “I have the archives and the kitchen. Owen has the hothouse. Tosh has her computers and Gwen has...well, we'll get Gwen a therapist's sofa. This should be yours, your safe place. Whenever being the Captain gets to be too much, now or in a thousand years, you could go back.”
Jack pulled Ianto in for a tight hug. “Ianto, Ianto, Ianto. Don't you know? I know I'm going to lose you soon. I lose everyone too soon. And this place could be a place for me in the future. But right now, I want to hold on to what I have. And while I have you, I want to have you, furniture and all.”
“You can't let yourself be alone, Jack. You couldn't stand it,” Ianto said against Jack's shoulder.
“I won't be. I promise,” Jack said.
Ianto chuckled. “Promise?” Jack nodded. “Ok then. As lovely as this Hallmark moment is, can we go back to normal now? No more breakdowns?”
“As long as you promise you won't keep acting like you don't care. 'Cause I know you're scared but it's ok.”
Ianto pulled back and stepped away. “Right, well, can we get back to picking out your bed then?”
“Our bed,” Jack emphasized as Ianto shook his head in exasperation. “And I'm not going anywhere till you tell me what you honestly think about that vase,” he said, pointing to the vase still in Jack's hand.
“Um, honestly?” Ianto asked, biting his lip. “I think it's one of the most wretched things I've ever seen.”
“Fantastic!” Jack said, dropping the could-be-a-vase back onto the shelf and steering Ianto back towards the beds. “Now what'd'you say to trying out a bunch of beds with me?”
"That has got to be the best place on Earth!" Jack said, spinning around as he carried bags of household goods to the car. "I mean, seriously! All that stuff under one place! And a restaurant! It's better than ASDA!"
"It's just IKEA, Jack," Ianto said, shaking his head. It was gone five now; no way they were getting any work done on the cottage. At least they'd finally settled on a bed. Ianto'd still refused to pick it, but Jack refused to leave until Ianto at least told him which beds he didn't like. The dark wood on this one complimented both men and seemed sturdy enough for their 'extracurricular' activities. And as much as Ianto wanted to spare Jack the heartache that would come with his eventual death (just his luck, he'd electrocute himself trying to plug the Hoover into the Hub Archive's outdated electrical systems), he was secretly pleased that Jack insisted on getting things Ianto liked. Ianto did have his pride after all, and knowing that some part of him, albeit in the form of a bed, would be with Jack for many, many years and many, many lovers (and wasn't that a disgusting thought), was definitely a self-esteem booster.
"Yeah, but we got everything in one run! It's like going to one of the bazaar days back in Persia. Everything in one street, but with a roof!"
"Felt more like a rat's maze to me," Ianto said laughing as Jack walked backwards into a light pole. He put his bags in the open boot. "And now we've lost a day at the cottage. Everything'll still be waiting for us, bad plumbing and all."
Jack stalked over and slung his bags into the boot. He pushed Ianto up against the car. "Not necessarily," he purred.
"Uu, Jack?" Ianto croaked.
"I promised a working toilet, didn't I?" Jack asked, eyes burning into Ianto's. "And what Jack promises, Jack delivers."
"What?" Ianto swallowed, trying desperately to retain some sort of decency in the middle of the IKEA parking lot. Not that the teenagers in the car five cars down were trying, if the slight rocking was anything to go by, but still. Ianto had standards.
"I hired a plumber and an electrician last night. They were up there today, left me a voicemail saying everything was done. Had to pay through the nose, but again, what I promise, I deliver. Besides, why waste our time on that, when we should be christening every room in the house? Don't think I've forgotten you promised to let me have my way with you."
Jack kissed Ianto, slipping the car keys from his hands and bounding over to the driver's door. "I'm driving!" he called back.
Ianto walked over to the door and poked his head through the open window. "Jack, Sir? Can I have my car back now?"
He swallowed hard when he saw the greedy look in Jack's eyes.
"Nope," he said dangerously. "You've played enough today. I'm in charge. Get in the car."