Of Fake Fairytales and Faux Amour - Chapter 13
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Big thanks to llamaramauk for betaing as usual!
Title: Of Fake Fairytales and Faux Amour
Authors: Lyrical Rawr & Shiva
Pairing: Fake!? Phoenix/Edgeworth
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor/Romance
Warnings: Swearing, possible SPOILERS for GS1 and 2
Status: Complete
Word count (Ch.13): 8636
Summary: Miles desperately needs a way to get rid of an unwanted admirer, and what better way is there than to pretend to date his very male, straight best friend and rival? It sounded so foolproof in his head...
Chapter 1 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 21
Chapter 2 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 17
Chapter 3 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 18
Chapter 4 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 19
Chapter 5 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 20
Of Fake Fairytales and Faux Amour
-- Chapter 13 --
Too Close for Comfort
Miles looked at his reflection in the mirror and sighed.
This is no good. I’ve worn this one before.
He took off his tie and walked over to the closet to put it back on the hanger. He flicked through his collection and, after weighing up his options, finally decided on a dark red one. Miles quickly put the tie on and walked back to the mirror to make sure it didn’t clash too much with his white shirt and dark blue jeans.
He stared at himself for a moment and frowned.
Great. Now I look like Wright.
Sighing, he took the tie off and threw it on the bed. Why did this have to be so complicated?
Or maybe I’m the one who’s making a big deal over nothing.
He crossed his arms and looked at his reflection again.
Do I even need to wear a tie? We’re only going to a movie. Maybe it’s a bit much…
Besides… didn’t Larry say it was a bad idea?
Miles shook his head.
There’s something seriously wrong with me if I’m considering listening to any advice from the Butz.
He glanced over at his cellphone that was sitting on the dresser.
Maybe I should call Wright and ask him what he’s wearing?
…What the hell am I saying?
Miles closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
This is ridiculous… Why am I putting so much thought into this? Wright won’t even notice what I’m wearing because he’s not… because he doesn’t…
Miles sighed.
I need to calm down.
He walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge, before letting himself fall on his back. These past two days had been quite stressful. Yesterday’s trial had been a complete disaster and was now scheduled to reconvene on Monday, which had led to Miles spending the past twenty-four hours looking for new leads. He hadn’t slept much, if at all, and the case was seriously starting to give him a migraine. He should have been thankful for this opportunity to get away from it, if only for a few hours, but instead, all he could do was stress even more.
What the hell was I thinking?
Nothing good can come from this…
His mind kept darting back to the events of Thursday night - to one moment in particular - as if to convince him that this was a good idea and that he hadn’t just put himself into another crazy situation. He shivered slightly as he remembered again - the closeness, the warmth. It had pushed him way beyond his comfort zone, and yet, it would be a lie if he said that he didn’t like it. In fact, it was one of the best feelings he’d ever had.
Damn it, Wright…
How am I supposed to stay detached after that?
Miles sighed and brought a hand to his face. How could he have been stupid enough to fall for Wright? This should have been nothing more than an act. He’d stupidly let his feelings take over and now he was using the situation with Everett to see him.
Am I so pathetic that I can’t even ask him to spend time with me?
It’s not as if he would say no… or think anything of it… considering the reason I’m like this is because he made me spend all that time with him.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
Miles sat back up sharply as his cellphone started to ring.
Why do people always call me at the worst possible time?
He got up and made his way to his dresser to pick up his phone. He paused to clear his throat before answering.
“Miles Edgeworth.”
“Is this seriously how you answer your phone all the time? Even your cellphone?”
Miles blinked. “…Wright?”
“No, it’s the Pope… Of course it’s me!” Phoenix snorted. “Anyways, I was just calling to say I’m ready. When are you coming to pick me up?”
There it was again, that tingling sensation. If his voice alone had that much of an effect on him, he had no idea how he would manage to survive the whole night.
“Sorry, I didn’t check the caller ID. I would have answered in a more… friendly manner if I knew it was you.”
“…Is your brain lagging? You’re like a whole question behind.”
“Oh… sorry… I… uh…” Miles tried his hardest to remember what Phoenix had just asked him, but to no avail. “What were you saying?”
“…Are you sure you’re okay?” Phoenix asked, sounding concerned.
Miles sighed. “I’m fine. I just didn’t get much sleep.”
“When do you ever get any sleep?”
“I’m not as sleep-deprived as you seem to think I am, Wright,” Miles replied defensively.
“We both know that’s not true,” Phoenix retorted. “I worry about you sometimes.”
Miles felt his pulse rise slightly at that comment. “…You do?”
“Well, I mean, sometimes you look like you’re about to faint. You’re obviously not sleeping eight hours a night.”
Miles frowned. “Don’t exaggerate, I’m never that bad. Besides, why do you care so much about my sleeping habits?”
“I don’t! I mean… I do! I mean…” Phoenix paused. “Just don’t make yourself sick, okay?”
You really do worry too much.
“I’ll be fine.”
Phoenix sighed. “You always say that… But I know there’s no point in arguing, so… when are you picking me up?”
Miles looked at his watch. Eight twenty-three. The movie was starting at nine thirty and it would take about half an hour to go pick up Wright and get to the cinema.
“I’ll leave in five minutes.”
“Alright, see you in a bit.”
“Goodbye.”
Miles hung up the phone and breathed a sigh of relief. He had managed to get through that phone call without sounding too much like an idiot. Now he only had to get through the whole night with Wright sitting right next to him. This looked promising.
He shook his head and grabbed his keys and wallet from his night table. He pocketed the latter along with his phone and walked over to the mirror to take one last glance at his reflection, before leaving the room and heading for the back door.
As he stepped out, he was surprised to see that the sun had yet to set. He’d been so preoccupied that he hadn’t noticed how long the days had gotten. Not that it really mattered considering he spent most of his evenings in the office, but he’d always found short days depressing so the thought alone was kind of nice.
Miles quickly locked the door behind him and, as he started making his way down the stairs, he found that he was actually looking forward to the evening. Normally, he would have dreaded having to spend the night with Everett, but this time, it seemed that seeing Wright was the only thing that really mattered.
He finally reached his car and got in. After quickly fastening his seatbelt, he went to turn on the ignition, but paused to glance at the rear-view mirror. For some reason, he couldn’t help but smile at his reflection. Everything was going to be fine.
---
“Edgeworth, we’re doomed.”
Miles stopped trying to discreetly inspect the poster of the newest Steel Samurai movie and looked over at Phoenix. He had one of the cinema’s promotional leaflets open in his hand.
“Well done on managing to state the obvious, Wright.”
“No, seriously, we’re doomed,” Phoenix repeated. He flicked back a page and started to read out loud, “‘Dusk is an atmospheric, modern-day love story between a teenage girl, stuck in ordinary reality, and a mysterious demon from another hidden world--’”
“I think we gathered that it’s not going to have the most original plot,” Miles pointed out.
Phoenix glanced up. “Yeah, but that’s not all of it. Wait till you hear the review…” He turned the page and seemed to find the spot he was looking for. “‘The movie closely follows the roots of the best-selling teen novel and will have many teenage girls wishing they too could be in the arms of the hunky demon hero!’”
Miles frowned. “You can’t be serious.” He took the leaflet from Phoenix to scan the review section. “My God, they actually used the word ‘hunky’.”
Phoenix laughed. “I never thought I’d say this, but it looks like I’m going to have to agree with Kath’s sister. This movie looks awful!”
That’s an understatement if ever I heard one.
“You may well agree, but honestly, she’s the last person who should be calling something awful,” Miles replied dryly, placing the leaflet back on the stand nearby.
Had he been completely open, he would have used much stronger language to describe Beth’s blatant homophobia towards them. He had remained as passive as possible in Kath’s house, not wanting to rise to the bait or show any signs of weakness, but in retrospect, he kind of wished he hadn’t. After all, the woman wasn’t worth the patience it took to listen to her ignorant opinions.
“Don’t get me started.” Phoenix shook his head. “She needs to learn some fucking decency and to keep her disgusting comments to herself.”
How eloquent… I couldn’t have phrased it any better myself.
“I think it’s safe to say that I’m not the one still stuck in the dark ages on this topic,” Miles said with an air of haughtiness.
Phoenix chuckled. “Well, I guess if she really loves Enrique, she’ll have to start acting as modern-minded as you, Edgeworth.”
Miles raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”
“He called me ‘babe’,” Phoenix replied, smirking.
“And that automatically makes him gay?”
“No! No, I was just… He told me he was bisexual.”
Miles frowned. “Bisexual?”
If that’s the case, then why the hell did that woman treat us the way she did!?
I guess she must not know…
…Wait.
“Why exactly did he tell you that he’s bisexual?”
Phoenix blinked. “…Because he is?”
There was a pause as Miles simply looked at Phoenix, arms crossed, and Phoenix stared back, clearly confused.
“Whoa, wait, you don’t think that he…?” A grin formed on Phoenix’s face as Miles’ frown deepened. “Aww, don’t be jealous, Edgeworth. His pick-up lines had nothing on yours.”
Jealous…!?
What on Earth made him think that!? Why would I be jealous? Maybe I just thought it was strange for a man who’s engaged to be married to hit on someone’s boyfriend!
…Who am I kidding?
Shit, he doesn’t suspect anything, does he?
…God. I need to stop being so paranoid. Wright is always making stupid jokes like that.
I seriously need to get over myself.
Pushing his thoughts to the side, Miles rolled his eyes. “Don’t be such an idiot, Wright.”
Phoenix laughed. “Hey, I’m not the one jumping to conclusions! He just asked me for some advice, Edgeworth. Apparently, he loves Beth, for some reason, and doesn’t know if he should tell her his little secret.”
“Let me guess. You told him to tell her, didn’t you?” Miles said, unimpressed.
“Well, I said that if she loved him, then I don’t see how it would affect how she feels about him…”
Miles sighed. “You’re so bloody simple sometimes.”
“You think I’m wrong?”
“As beautiful as the notion of ‘love conquers all’ is, Wright, it’s simply a load of rubbish.”
Phoenix frowned. “Wow, Edgeworth, it’s pretty sad that you’ve already predetermined that.”
You really have no idea…
“I think that watching Dusk might change your mind,” Miles commented, keen on changing the subject. “It sounds so stomach-churning that it’s likely to make you sick at the simple mention of ‘happily ever after’.”
“You make a very good point,” Phoenix admitted. “Still, as awful as it is, coming to watch it is a worthy sacrifice.”
Miles raised an eyebrow. “A worthy sacrifice? What on Earth could be worth witnessing this atrocity?”
I’m starting to doubt my reasons for coming if he seriously deems the movie worth watching.
“Ah… well… you know…” Phoenix trailed off, clearing his throat. “Well, it’s… err… good to get away from all that work back at home, I guess…”
Miles crossed his arms, smirking. “That could have been convincing if you were talking to someone who doesn’t know you. I doubt you even have work at the office, never mind at your house, Wright.”
“Hey! I could have loads in both of those places!” Phoenix said in weak defence. “I could have five cases on the go for all you know!” He paused. “Yeah… Well, I guess I don’t really… have any…”
God knows how he manages to pay his bills…
Phoenix sighed. “Alright, alright! Don’t take this the wrong way or anything…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess I believe it’s worth using our situation so I… well… so I can spend time with you - even if it means having to watch a shitty movie.”
Is he serious?
There I was, getting anxious about wanting to spend time with him, and it turns out I was just overthinking everything…
…Not that that’s anything new.
“I guess having an excuse to spend time with my idiotic friend is nearly worth the sacrifice of being mentally scarred for life,” Miles replied.
Phoenix grinned. “And here was I thinking you didn’t care, Edgey-baby.”
Before Miles could even contemplate a retort, he felt someone run behind him and suddenly went blind as hands covered his eyes.
“Guess who!” Kath’s voice greeted cheerfully.
Oh, for Christ’s sake…
“Everett, what are you doing?”
He heard Kath huff from behind him. “You’re too good, Miles!” She released him from her clutches, allowing him to see once again. “Apart from it’s Kath, not Everett.”
Miles frowned. “Kath, you’re late.”
“Oh? I thought I was early!” She checked her watch. “Didn’t we say half past?”
“Well, the movie starts at half past,” Phoenix said, pointing unhelpfully at the cinema.
Kath looked startled. “What!? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We better get the tickets straight away!” She grabbed Miles by the arm and tugged, leading him and the trailing Phoenix into the cinema lobby.
Noticing the long queue for the ticket booth, Kath started jogging to reach the end, still pulling Miles along with her. After nearly stumbling twice, he finally managed to shake off her hold. Kath carried on at the same pace towards the back of the line and Miles saw her forcibly cut in front of two teenage girls who were just about to join.
I don’t believe her sometimes…
“Come on, guys! Stop being so slow!” she called over to Miles and Phoenix.
It was deeply embarrassing to join Kath in her acquired spot. Miles did his best to ignore the glares of the young girls behind them and glanced over at Phoenix, who was trying to hide his face by rubbing his cheek with his whole palm.
“Everett, was the rush really necessary?” Miles asked. “The trailers take up the first ten minutes of the screening and it hasn’t even started yet.”
“Don’t be silly, Miles,” Kath replied with a swish of her hand. That was apparently enough to explain her actions as she said nothing more until they reached the front of the queue.
The man behind the ticket desk smiled at them as they approached. “Hello, how can I help y--”
“Three tickets for Dusk!” Kath almost shouted at him, hopping excitedly from one foot to the other.
She’s even more immature than Larry…
Thankfully, the man looked amused by her exuberance and didn’t seem fazed by her rude interruption. “Is that the nine thir--”
“Yes, yes, the nine thirty showing. There are tickets left, right?”
Miles looked at Phoenix. He hadn’t even contemplated the fact that the tickets might be sold out. Their lives may have been spared!
“You’re in luck; there are a dozen tickets left for that showing,” the cashier answered, squashing Miles’ dream. “Two adults and a child, is it?”
Phoenix snorted with barely contained laughter.
“Oh, no, it’s three adults.” Kath was obviously too busy trying to get her wallet out of her purse to notice the small jibe from the cashier.
“Sorry, my mistake.” The cashier turned to his till monitor and pressed a few things on the screen. “That’s thirty-six dollars all together.”
I can’t believe we actually have to pay to watch this thing.
Miles sighed and pulled his wallet out of his jeans’ pocket to flick through his notes, deciding to pass twenty-five dollars over to Kath. Quicker than a flash, the money was added to her contribution and shoved in the cashier’s hand to be exchanged for the dreaded tickets.
“Off we go! We’ve got to get good seats!” Kath exclaimed, ushering them away from the ticket desk.
“W-wait, I haven’t even paid for the--” Phoenix cut himself off as he looked up from his wallet that he’d only just managed to pull out of his pocket. He stared at the tickets in Kath’s hand. “Oh.”
“That’s so cute! Miles paid for you without you even noticing, Mr. Wright!” She seemed pretty intent on getting to the movie, however, as she grabbed Miles’ arm and started pulling him towards the theatre, pausing only to hand Phoenix one of the tickets. “Miles and I will find us some seats. You can go and get us some popcorn.”
Great. I always look forward to spending some time alone with Everett.
Before either of them could even begin to protest, she’d dragged Miles most of the way to the door of theatre two. He managed to shake her off before they reached the usher, giving him a brief pause to recollect himself.
“I presume you’ve been looking forward to this, Everett?” Miles asked dryly as he handed his ticket over to get ripped in half.
Kath looked at him, a big smile on her face. “It’s going to be the best movie ever, I just know it!”
Her deep enthusiasm could have been endearing, if it weren’t for the fact that he also had to go in and watch the movie with her.
Kath rushed forward, beckoning Miles to follow, and made her way up to the middle rows in the middle column. The third seat in seemed to please her as she settled down and gestured for Miles to sit next to her.
“I thought the back seats were more conventionally thought to be the best?” Miles said after sitting down.
“Oh, no, Miles. If you go too far back, you miss some of the intricate details!” she replied with a knowing look. “However, I’m sure when you and Mr. Wright watch a movie, they’re the best by far.”
…I presume she’s insinuating something degrading there.
Miles frowned. “Right… Of course.”
Kath suddenly grabbed his arm, a look of disbelief on her face. “Miles! Don’t tell me you and Mr. Wright have had you know what in a theatre as well as all those other places!?”
Miles flinched away from her grasp. “No! Why would you… What on Earth made you think that!?”
What is it with this woman and intercourse in public places?
Seriously, in the back of a theatre? That’s just unhygienic! And exposed! And uncomfortable! And… well, it’s an idiotic idea all around, never mind the practicality.
Kath giggled. “Well, Mr. Wright seems like an adventurous kind of guy. It didn’t seem so outrageous to think you might have.”
I think you’ll find that, yes, outrageous is exactly how I’d describe that idea.
Miles rubbed his forehead in frustration. “Contrary to your beliefs, Phoenix and I have a lot more to our relationship than mindless physical interactions.”
“Oh, sure,” Kath replied, rolling her eyes. “Miles, you should know that you can’t fool me.”
Miles frowned. “Fool you?”
Kath grabbed his arm again, albeit a lot more gently than usual. “I can tell that you and Mr. Wright have very different takes on this relationship of yours, Miles. He’s dedicated his life to you and is always making efforts to keep your exciting romance alive!”
…Is that seriously what she thinks his apparent perversion represents?
“I hate to say it,” Kath continued, her expression turning sympathetic, “but he really is in love with you.”
Miles stared at her, at a complete loss for words. “I don’t… How… Why would that be a bad thing for our relationship?”
Kath sighed and patted his arm. “Oh, Miles, you don’t have to play dumb. It’s okay, I understand!” After yet another blank look from Miles, she sighed again. “People say you shouldn’t be in a relationship for sex alone, but sometimes the sex is just too good, am I right?”
Miles blinked.
“You think that I’m only with Phoenix… for sex.”
Kath nodded and smiled brightly. “There’s no need to be ashamed, Miles! We both know that your relationship can’t last forever so you may as well enjoy it before you have to break the poor guy’s heart.”
How can she say that so calmly!?
“Everett, y--”
“Don’t worry,” Kath interrupted, leaning towards him. “I won’t say anything. And if you ever feel like trying something different, I’m always here for you, Miles.”
…Great. Just great.
Of course she still thinks she has a chance with me; the whole fake gay relationship thing would only work on a sane person!
Miles pulled back and shook her hand off his arm. “Everett, you are sorely mistaken in every bit of your reasoning.”
Kath waved a hand. “Oh, come now, you can trust me to keep another one of your little secrets!”
“No, it’s not…” Miles trailed off. He turned to look at the screen, which had just started to show the trailers. Was he really prepared to admit something to her that he had barely come to terms with himself?
“Everett… I don’t know what I did to make you think that, but I’m not that kind of person.”
“Come on, Miles! Every time I ask you about your feelings for Mr. Wright, you change the subject!”
Miles turned to look at her and frowned. “…I do?”
“Oh, please!” She shook her head. “Mr. Wright keeps going on and on about how much he loves you, but the only thing you’ve ever said about him is that he’s good with his tongue.” She scoffed. “If that’s not a big, flashing red light, I don’t know what is!”
Miles opened his mouth to retort, but closed it again when nothing came out.
It’s true. All of it.
But how the hell was I supposed to know that I’d come across as some kind of heartless sex addict!?
He sighed.
I guess I have no choice.
“Look, Everett…” He paused, taking a moment to convince himself that he was ready to say it. “The truth is, I really lo--”
“Damn, looks like I missed the best part.”
Miles froze. He then slowly turned to see Phoenix standing at the end of the row, two boxes of popcorn in his hands.
Why do you always have to show up at the worst possible moment!?
Phoenix glanced back and forth between Miles and Kath, a look of unease spreading across his face. “Why are you both glaring at me like that?”
“That was very quick, Mr. Wright,” Kath commented in the flattest tone Miles had ever heard her use.
Funny, I thought it took him a lifetime…
“Err… yeah, I guess…” Phoenix hesitantly took the seat next to Miles and passed a box over to Kath. “Did I miss something?”
Miles shot him a look, warning him not to press this one.
Shrugging, Phoenix turned to watch the trailers. He grabbed a handful of popcorn, before offering Miles the box.
Miles shook his head and shifted in his seat slightly, watching Kath out of the corner of his eye. Thanks to Wright’s interruption, there was no way of knowing what she might do now.
“You alright?” Phoenix asked through a mouthful of popcorn.
“I just… feel a bit claustrophobic sitting in the middle of the row like this.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Claustrophobic?”
Miles tilted his head in Kath’s direction, hoping Phoenix would understand. When he merely took another handful of popcorn, Miles made a few more twitches, each one a bit more obvious than the last.
Come on, Wright, get the hint…
It suddenly seemed to click in his mind after the fifth gesture. “Oh! Yeah, that whole, um… claustrophobic… thing. You, err… want to switch?”
“I don’t think that’s necessary, Mr. Wr--”
“Thank you,” Miles answered quickly, standing up as soon as the words left his mouth.
It was hard to catch in the dark, but Miles saw Phoenix roll his eyes as he dropped his handful of popcorn back into the box and got up to give Miles his seat. After settling back down next to Kath, Phoenix leaned over to whisper in his ear, “You owe me big time for this, you know.”
Miles smirked. “Think of it as a repayment for dragging me to that party.”
“As if! You came willingly!” Phoenix argued.
“Willingly?” Miles scoffed. “I was emotionally blackmailed to attend.”
Phoenix frowned. “That’s unfair. You agreed that you weren’t trying very hard.”
“That still doesn’t mean I went willingly,” Miles replied, leaning back into his seat.
“You so did.”
“I did not.”
“Did.”
“Shush with the whispery flirting, guys,” Kath interrupted in a slightly quieter than normal voice. “The movie’s about to start!”
“See? I win!” Phoenix said with a triumphant grin.
Miles shook his head and smiled slightly.
If we were competing for who’s the biggest child, then yes, you did.
The opening credits started to roll on the screen, followed by the word ‘Dusk’, which appeared in big, glowing green letters, before fading out into some fog. A plane was seen approaching a landing strip, the camera then zooming in on a teenage girl sitting inside. She had long, dark brown hair and was wearing a blue hooded jacket. It was unclear where she was going, but she didn’t seem very enthusiastic about it.
The plane landed and the girl made her way into the airport, where she was met by her father and introduced as Bianca. They exchanged a few words about the bad weather, then started heading towards the car that was apparently abandoned a few blocks away because her father didn’t want to pay for parking.
After a few minutes of walking in silence, they finally reached the car. Miles wasn’t sure why the director had deemed it necessary to show them walking all the way there, but he figured that it must have been some intricate storytelling technique he didn’t understand. Bianca’s luggage was thrown into the trunk and they started driving towards what Miles presumed was her father’s house.
The following conversation proved his assumption to be true. Bianca was upset about her mother getting remarried and had decided to move to Spoons to live with her father. The discussion went on and on about which room Bianca would take, what her favorite meals were and when she would start school.
Miles sighed. Was all this information really necessary? And why did Bianca seem so apathetic towards everything? He swore her facial expression hadn’t changed once since the beginning of the movie.
How could anyone ever relate to her?
I thought movie characters were supposed to be likable…
The interminable scene finally faded back out into the fog and the camera panned down from the sky to reveal Bianca looking out of a classroom window. She was apparently oblivious to the fact that several teenage boys were staring at her.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” Phoenix mumbled. “It’s even set in a school and everything.”
“Where did you think it would be set, Wright? In court?” Miles whispered back.
“Well, it’s just so… young and… cliché and…” Phoenix gestured something stupid with his hands, before dropping them and letting out a sigh. “I feel old.”
Miles chuckled in reply. How could Wright, of all people, feel old? He had the mentality of a twelve-year-old at most.
“Look at this guy,” Phoenix commented as the boy sitting next to Bianca introduced himself as Edgar. “I don’t think he’s ever heard of this thing called the sun.”
“Some people actually have work to do and can’t afford to spend all their time outside,” Miles replied, not quite able to keep the defensive tone from his voice.
Phoenix grinned and patted Miles on the arm. “Of course, Edgeworth. I like my men pasty white, anyway.”
Miles rolled his eyes, making sure to be as dramatic as possible so Phoenix would catch the movement in the dark. Against his better judgement, he then decided to focus on the movie.
The scene played out with Edgar being the only guy not interested in Bianca. In fact, he seemed to really dislike her, to the point of making up an excuse about not feeling well to leave the classroom.
In the next scene, Bianca was shown making friends in the cafeteria. They told her that Edgar was extremely weird and that she should stay away from him. However, she did not seem to care, and as the scenes went on, she kept mentioning Edgar a lot more than was suitable after their fleeting conversation. She also seemed to be completely ungrateful to anyone who tried to help her.
“Well, I was willing to give this movie a chance,” Phoenix whispered, “but that girl’s really starting to grate on my nerves.”
“Don’t lie, Wright. Neither of us was ever going to give this movie a chance once we heard that Everett wanted to watch it.”
Phoenix laughed, probably louder than was courteous for those watching the movie. An evil look from Kath confirmed Miles’ suspicions. Phoenix turned his laugh into a cough and held his hand up in apology. With a shake of the head and a small smirk, Miles turned his attention back to the movie. He had paid for it, after all.
Bianca was now walking home from school and it was very dark and cloudy. She was looking down at her feet and didn’t seem to be paying attention to where she was going. She got to an intersection and started crossing the road when a tractor suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Unfortunately, she didn’t have a dramatic collision with it and was instead saved by Edgar, who jumped up really high and landed on the tractor, turning the wheel at the last second. The tractor hit another car, which went into the side of a truck, but apparently, that was all okay because Bianca was safe. Edgar then mysteriously disappeared, leaving the wreckage for someone else to deal with.
That has got to be the worst life-saving act I’ve ever witnessed, and I’ve seen a fair amount in my line of work!
-Bring bring, bring bring-
Miles glanced in the direction of the sudden noise and noticed that everyone around him was doing the same.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
The man whose phone it was, realising that everyone was staring at him, started frantically searching every pocket, even going as far as to check his hood.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
“Will you shut that fucking phone off!?” Kath screeched, making all the people around her jump. She stood up and pointed her finger in the man’s direction. “We are trying to watch the movie! How much of an inconsiderate jerk are you to take away from our viewing rights!? We paid for those tickets, you know!”
“Miss Everett, I think that’s enou--”
“You should be ashamed of yourself!” Kath continued, ignoring Phoenix’s attempt to quell her rage. “It’s common friggin’ courtesy to turn your damned phone off in a theatre!”
“You’re going to get us thrown out if you keep shouting, Everett,” Miles said, half wishing that she would manage to alert the ushers.
Kath looked down at Miles, an angry look on her face. “Some people just need telling, Miles!”
The ringing stopped. “Sorry, thought I had it on silent,” the man muttered, obviously embarrassed.
“It’s okay, no harm done,” Kath said calmly, smoothing her skirt down and sitting back in her seat.
I would not like to get on the wrong side of this insane woman…
Miles shared a quick glance with Phoenix and they both smirked. They had obviously had the same thought.
He turned back to the movie again. It seemed as though Bianca had been doing some research. According to her findings, two different tribes were believed to have been living in the town for centuries. One of them was composed of people related to cats and the other had apparently come from a dark, underground domain.
“Imagine being related to a cat,” Phoenix said, putting his empty popcorn box on the floor. “Their breath must stink.”
Miles looked down at the box, then back up at Phoenix. “Are you going to leave that there?”
“…Yes?”
“That’s littering.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “So? We’re in a theatre. It’s dark.”
“If that is the general population’s consensus, I really don’t want to be sitting on this seat,” Miles said, feeling the top of his armrests, before quickly taking his hands away when he found something sticky.
Phoenix chuckled. “You don’t know the half of it, Edgeworth.”
Don’t worry, Wright. Everett has already done an excellent job of making sure I know how dirty these places are…
Bianca was on her way home from meeting her friends when she ran into a hooded man. She gave him an evil look and tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm and pushed up her sleeve, revealing her watch. She struggled and tried to scream, only to have the man cover her mouth with his hand. He told her to empty her pockets, but as soon as he had spoken, Edgar appeared and wrestled him to the floor, saving Bianca again.
They decided to have coffee together and, after a lot of talking, Bianca brought up the research she had done on the history of Spoons. She asked him if he was one of those ‘dark creatures’. Edgar didn’t answer and instead took her to a cave just outside of town. As they walked deeper into the cave, he started to glow.
That doesn’t seem evolutionarily advantageous.
Miles rubbed his temples - maybe he was getting tired and his sleepy vision was causing the whole picture to glow? Unfortunately, the next scene explained that Edgar did indeed glow in the dark. He was a nice demon who, instead of doing the Devil’s work, helped keep peace in the world.
Miles sighed.
This just keeps getting better and better…
After a few more scenes, he realised that Kath had been quiet for a while. He checked his watch to see how much time had gone by. Not a word in half an hour.
That’s got to be some kind of record.
He tilted his head towards Phoenix and whispered, “We should bring her here more often.”
He expected him to add something or at least laugh, but when he did neither, Miles turned to him, only to find him asleep, his head slouched forward slightly.
Miles raised an eyebrow.
Really?
He turned back to the screen.
I’m not sure how he can sleep through the noise, but I can’t exactly blame him.
I was by no means expecting a masterpiece, but this is beyond bad.
Letting out a sigh, he brought his attention back to Phoenix.
Even asleep, Miles could make out a faint smile on his lips and he looked strangely relaxed for someone having to sit through this atrocity.
After studying his face for a moment, it suddenly occurred to Miles that this was the first time he’d seen Wright asleep since the sleepovers they had as children. He remembered they would talk for hours after going to bed and get told several times to go to sleep because no matter how quiet they thought they were being, their parents always managed to hear them. Then, at some point, the conversation would slowly die down until only a few sparse words were spoken, and they’d wake up the next day not remembering falling asleep.
Miles felt a smile tug at his lips as those memories came back to him.
The more he looked, though, the less familiar this felt. Watching Wright sleep seemed a lot more interesting now than it did back then. Especially after what happened at Everett’s party.
How much of an accident was it, really?
Miles shivered at the thought and felt a sudden urge to get closer. Before he had time to reconsider, he shifted in his seat until his shoulder was resting against Phoenix’s.
The warmth was overwhelming.
Without thinking, he shifted a bit more and rested his head on Phoenix’s shoulder.
It was a few seconds before his brain started working again. But just as he was about to mentally kick himself, Phoenix seemed to react to his actions and tilted his head sideways, resting it on top of his head.
Miles didn’t know what to think. Had he woken up? Was that just a reflex?
“Wright…?” he whispered hesitantly.
“Mmm…” Phoenix mumbled.
His response just left Miles even more confused. He decided not to pursue it, however, afraid that any more talking would cause Phoenix to move again.
As much as he usually despised physical contact, he could definitely get used to this. Never had he imagined that he would - or could - get that close to someone. And never had he expected that someone to be Wright, but he realised now that there was no point in fighting it. This felt right and that was all that really mattered.
Maybe I’ve been too pessimistic?
He did say several times that he enjoys spending time with me… And he’s constantly worried about me being mad at him… And he keeps making all these jokes…
Has he been trying to tell me something?
Miles quickly dismissed the thought.
Perhaps I’m being slightly too optimistic.
He decided it was probably better not to ponder it too much for now. Time would tell, and at the moment, all that mattered were that warm shoulder and that head resting on top of his.
A moment went by. Wright hadn’t moved an inch so Miles decided to try and make sense of what was going on in the movie. He found the whole thing rather absurd - since when did demons glow in the dark? But to be fair, he wasn’t an expert when it came to fantasy lore, and his attention at the moment was anything but undivided.
From what he understood, Bianca was getting frustrated because Edgar kept telling her that it was too dangerous for them to be together.
And now they were going to play t-ball with Edgar’s family.
…I give up.
Miles turned his attention back to Phoenix. He couldn’t see his face but he could tell from the way he was breathing that he was still sound asleep.
He closed his eyes. This was probably the closest thing to comfort he’d ever felt. It was kind of sad, he realised, considering where they were, but that thought was quickly cast aside. He felt so relaxed he started wondering if having Wright this close at night would cure his insomnia. It sure seemed like it at the moment, as he felt as though he could fall asleep at any second.
And to think that a week ago, I panicked whenever Wright got too close.
He smiled.
I couldn’t have been more wrong. This is--
-BOOM-
Miles jumped in his seat and looked around, alarmed, before realising that the noise had come from a thunderstorm in the movie.
He breathed a sigh of relief and rubbed his forehead.
That was unnecessarily loud…
“I guess I fell asleep?”
Miles turned to Phoenix, who was looking at him expectantly.
Shit. I hope he didn’t notice.
“Indeed, you did,” he replied cautiously.
Phoenix smiled and turned back to the screen. He squinted a bit, before rubbing vigorously at his eyes. “So what did I miss?” he asked, blinking a few times to clear his vision.
That was a good question. What had he missed? Not only did Miles not know when Phoenix had fallen asleep, but he also hadn’t really been paying attention.
“Nothing of interest,” Miles replied quickly in an attempt to avoid the question.
Phoenix chuckled. “Obviously.” He turned back to Miles. “But seriously, I want to know.”
Christ.
“Well… um…” Miles racked his brains to remember what had happened in this sorry excuse for a movie. “The girl is an idiot and the guy glows in the dark.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Yeah… I know that.” He glanced at the screen, then back at Miles. “You haven’t been watching, have you?”
“I have, but this thing makes no sense whatsoever.” Miles sighed. “I don’t know what to tell you.”
Phoenix smirked. “So you’re telling me that you can solve the most complicated cases but you can’t make sense of a chick flick?”
“You mean I can’t make sense out of something that’s completely devoid of it,” Miles retorted.
Phoenix laughed. “Fair enough. But you totally weren’t watching.”
Miles frowned. “Sure I was. The girl was trying to convince the demon that they should be together and then they went to play t-ball.”
Phoenix pointed at the screen. “You mean what they’re doing right now?”
Miles turned to see Bianca fail to hit the ball off the tee. Twice. She then started laughing at her own clumsiness, resulting in comments from all of Edgar’s family about how cute she was.
I think I’m going to be sick.
He turned back to Phoenix, who was smiling at him.
“What?”
Phoenix shook his head. “Nothing. It’s just…” He looked at Miles for a few seconds, before turning his attention back to the movie.
Well…?
“It’s just… what?” Miles insisted, realising that Phoenix wasn’t going to finish his sentence.
“It’s nothing, really. It’s just…” Phoenix turned back to him, before looking down at the floor. “I’m not sure how to say this without sounding stupid, but…” He looked back up at him and smiled sheepishly. “I thought you looked… I don’t know… happy? Well, in a ‘Why am I stuck here watching this garbage?’ sort of way, anyways.”
I looked… happy?
“Speaking of which,” Phoenix added, “look.” He leaned back in his seat and gestured towards Kath, who seemed rather absorbed in the movie.
You’re just noticing this now?
“Are you actually surprised that she likes it?”
Phoenix smirked. “No, but I figured she was enjoying it enough for all three of us.”
Miles blinked. He turned to look down at the exit, then back at Phoenix. “You don’t mean…?”
“I’ll take the blame, as usual.”
I suppose there’s no point in staying here.
Miles nodded. “Let’s go.”
He carefully got up from his seat, making sure not to block the view of the people behind him, and started heading down the steps towards the exit.
“Is she looking?” Phoenix whispered from close behind, one step away from the door to freedom.
Looking over his shoulder, Miles spotted Kath, who looked deeply engrossed. She had the strangest smile on her face. He took a glance at the screen and, lo and behold, Bianca and Edgar were kissing.
Miles rolled his eyes. “No, we’re clear.”
They reached the exit and almost simultaneously breathed a sigh of relief.
“The next time we go to the theatre, we choose the movie,” Phoenix stated with a laugh as they walked back towards the lobby.
Next time…?
Miles smiled. “I think I can promise that.”
Phoenix looked at him for a moment, then shook his head. “At least this means you can get back to the massive workload you have back at home. No slacking for you tonight!”
You don’t know what slacking is until you’ve seen me try to choose a bloody tie.
“Actually, I’m not due back in court until Monday,” Miles replied. “I think winding down with a cup of tea and a crossword will do me just fine tonight.”
Phoenix chuckled. “Only you, Edgeworth. Only you.”
Miles frowned. “What do you mean by that?”
Phoenix opened his mouth to answer, then closed it again as something behind Miles seemed to catch his eye. “Oh, boy…”
“Nick!?”
Miles spun around. There stood Maya, dressed in a Steel Samurai outfit without the mask. She was surrounded by a sea of people, most of whom were also dressed up as various characters.
“Nick!” she shouted again, waving and walking over to them. “And Mr. Edgeworth?” She stared at them for a moment, a puzzled look on her face. “What are you two doing here?”
“Well, we…” Miles looked at Phoenix, who simply stared back, eyes wide. “Well, you know…”
“Ah, yeah, err…” Phoenix gestured between the two of them. “We were just…”
“You see, it was…” Miles trailed off again.
“…Yeah,” Phoenix finished with a distinct lack of conviction.
Maya raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “You know, considering you’re lawyers, you’re both amazingly bad at thinking up a decent lie on the spot.”
Phoenix rubbed the back of his neck. “What, err, makes you think we’re trying to lie?”
…She has a very good point.
“Come off it! You’re so obvious even Pearly would notice!” Maya scrutinised them both. “So why are you acting so shifty?”
“We’re not acting shifty, Maya. You’re just reading into things too much…” Phoenix cleared his throat. “Why are you here, anyway?”
“Isn’t it obvious? I was queuing for the limited edition poster of the new Steel Samurai movie!” She waved the poster tube in her hand. “They’re giving them out for free to the first one hundred fans to show up. It’s coming out on June 7th! In five days!”
“Actually, it comes out on Friday June 8th,” Miles said coolly.
“Well, yeah, that’s for the general public, but the premiere… Wait, you’re a fan too, Mr. Edgeworth!?” Maya looked both shocked and ecstatic. “You’ve got to check out my signed spear pen!” She reached into her pocket and brought out a scaled-down version of the Steel Samurai’s spear, which she proceeded to thrust in front of Miles’ face.
And there goes all my dignity in one fell swoop…
“Lovely,” Miles commented. “But you have me wrong. I saw the date on that poster.” He pointed just behind Maya.
Phoenix smirked. “Oh, of course that’s how you knew the date.”
“Shut up, Wright.”
Maya turned to look where Miles was pointing, before giving them both the same piercing look as before. “Wait a minute… I know why you were both acting so shifty!”
…She worked it out from that!?
Phoenix glanced at Miles, his expression mirroring what Miles was thinking. “I-I… well…”
“You know I wouldn’t have minded if you’d told me right away, Nick! In fact, this is awesome news! Ooh!” Maya clapped her hands together, making both of them flinch. “We could trade!”
“T-trade!?” Phoenix exclaimed.
“Alright, keep your pants on. I know some people get attached to their cards, but geez, no need to bite my head off…”
Phoenix blinked. “Oh, right… cards. Obviously.”
Miles looked away, steadying his heartbeat.
Christ, what happened to my logic levels? Of course she didn’t work out why we were here just from that! I’m getting really paranoid lately…
…Damn you, Wright.
“It’s going to be so cool!” Maya continued. “You don’t need to be embarrassed about liking a kids’ show, you know! Tons of oldies come to the conventions!”
“Look, Maya, we weren’t here for the free post--Hey! What do you mean by ‘oldies’?”
“Of course you weren’t.” Maya winked. “Once a Steel Samurai fan, always a Steel Samurai fan! I’m afraid they’ve run out, though… But it’s okay, we can put mine in the office!”
Phoenix looked the opposite of thrilled at that idea.
“That’s a shame.” Miles put a hand on Phoenix’s shoulder. “You were really looking forward to your new poster.”
Maya put a hand to her mouth in sympathy. “Aww, Nick, I didn’t realise. I would have saved one for you if I knew!” She looked over her shoulder, then back at Phoenix. “I’ll go double-check for you. You never know, they could have counted wrong.”
As she wandered over to the stand, Phoenix turned to Miles with a smirk. “When did you develop a sense of humour?”
Miles shrugged. “Maybe it’s just amusing to see you uncomfortable outside of court as well as inside it.”
Phoenix scoffed. “Don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m always as cool as a cucumber.”
So that’s why you’re always drenched in sweat when you’re on the back foot…
“Keep telling yourself that, Wright.”
Maya came rushing back, looking forlorn. “Nope, not a single one.”
“That’s a shame. Edgeworth was just telling me how much he needed one to add to his collection,” Phoenix replied with feigned regret.
Miles sent him a disapproving look.
You could at least try to be original.
“Sucks,” Maya said with a frown. “But now that you’re here, we can have a burger date, Nick!”
Phoenix rolled his eyes. “Not burgers again…”
“Date?” Miles asked, eyebrows raised.
“Not that kind of date, Mr. Edgeworth,” Maya replied quickly. She put a hand to the side of her mouth and leaned over to whisper in his ear, “Nick has a proper girlfriend for that.”
There was a pause as Miles digested the information, trying his hardest not to overthink Maya’s comment.
Wright definitely doesn’t have a girlfriend, and he certainly hasn’t told Maya about me…
So where on Earth did she get that from!?
“Hey, Maya! You know it’s rude to whisper about someone who’s standing right in front of you.”
Maya giggled. “Whatever you say.” She winked at Miles, who didn’t really see the situation as something to wink over. “So… burgers?”
Phoenix eyed her suspiciously. “Right… Well, I don’t think Edgeworth will be up fo--”
“Nonsense,” Miles cut across. “Let’s go get something to eat. I think we deserve it after the day we’ve had.”
Phoenix laughed. “You know, I’m still not used to you being social.”
Miles ignored Phoenix’s comment and turned to Maya. “Where would you like to go? My treat.”
“Really, Mr. Edgeworth!?”
“Really.”
Maya clapped her hands together. “Awesome! I know this great burger joint down the road. Follow me!”
“Wait,” Phoenix cut in. “Are you sure you want to go to the restaurant dressed like that?”
Maya looked down at her costume then back up at Phoenix, a confused look on her face. “Your point?”
Phoenix sighed. “Never mind…”
Maya shrugged, then started jogging ahead.
When she was out of earshot, Phoenix turned to Miles. “What did she say to you? Do I have reason to be as paranoid as I am right now?”
“She said… well…” Miles turned to look at Phoenix.
I don’t think I want to know the truth right now. Just in case…
“Nothing.”
Phoenix rolled his eyes. “Alright, fine, don’t tell me.” He sighed and remained silent for a moment, before speaking up again. “You know, I’d tell you if anyone said anything about you.”
He’s such a child…
Miles shook his head. “People can say what they like about me, Wright.”
“I’m going to make sure they spit in your burger,” Phoenix replied, trying his hand at blackmail.
“I’m fairly sure they spit in all the burgers,” Miles countered. “That’s what they mean by ‘special sauce’.”
Phoenix laughed. “Nice. That sounds about as appealing as that movie we had to sit through.”
Miles smirked.
I’m sure spit burgers would still have more taste than whoever picked the lead actress for that movie.
Big thanks to llamaramauk for betaing as usual!
Title: Of Fake Fairytales and Faux Amour
Authors: Lyrical Rawr & Shiva
Pairing: Fake!? Phoenix/Edgeworth
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor/Romance
Warnings: Swearing, possible SPOILERS for GS1 and 2
Status: Complete
Word count (Ch.13): 8636
Summary: Miles desperately needs a way to get rid of an unwanted admirer, and what better way is there than to pretend to date his very male, straight best friend and rival? It sounded so foolproof in his head...
Chapter 1 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 21
Chapter 2 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 17
Chapter 3 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 18
Chapter 4 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 19
Chapter 5 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 20
Of Fake Fairytales and Faux Amour
-- Chapter 13 --
Too Close for Comfort
Miles looked at his reflection in the mirror and sighed.
This is no good. I’ve worn this one before.
He took off his tie and walked over to the closet to put it back on the hanger. He flicked through his collection and, after weighing up his options, finally decided on a dark red one. Miles quickly put the tie on and walked back to the mirror to make sure it didn’t clash too much with his white shirt and dark blue jeans.
He stared at himself for a moment and frowned.
Great. Now I look like Wright.
Sighing, he took the tie off and threw it on the bed. Why did this have to be so complicated?
Or maybe I’m the one who’s making a big deal over nothing.
He crossed his arms and looked at his reflection again.
Do I even need to wear a tie? We’re only going to a movie. Maybe it’s a bit much…
Besides… didn’t Larry say it was a bad idea?
Miles shook his head.
There’s something seriously wrong with me if I’m considering listening to any advice from the Butz.
He glanced over at his cellphone that was sitting on the dresser.
Maybe I should call Wright and ask him what he’s wearing?
…What the hell am I saying?
Miles closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
This is ridiculous… Why am I putting so much thought into this? Wright won’t even notice what I’m wearing because he’s not… because he doesn’t…
Miles sighed.
I need to calm down.
He walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge, before letting himself fall on his back. These past two days had been quite stressful. Yesterday’s trial had been a complete disaster and was now scheduled to reconvene on Monday, which had led to Miles spending the past twenty-four hours looking for new leads. He hadn’t slept much, if at all, and the case was seriously starting to give him a migraine. He should have been thankful for this opportunity to get away from it, if only for a few hours, but instead, all he could do was stress even more.
What the hell was I thinking?
Nothing good can come from this…
His mind kept darting back to the events of Thursday night - to one moment in particular - as if to convince him that this was a good idea and that he hadn’t just put himself into another crazy situation. He shivered slightly as he remembered again - the closeness, the warmth. It had pushed him way beyond his comfort zone, and yet, it would be a lie if he said that he didn’t like it. In fact, it was one of the best feelings he’d ever had.
Damn it, Wright…
How am I supposed to stay detached after that?
Miles sighed and brought a hand to his face. How could he have been stupid enough to fall for Wright? This should have been nothing more than an act. He’d stupidly let his feelings take over and now he was using the situation with Everett to see him.
Am I so pathetic that I can’t even ask him to spend time with me?
It’s not as if he would say no… or think anything of it… considering the reason I’m like this is because he made me spend all that time with him.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
Miles sat back up sharply as his cellphone started to ring.
Why do people always call me at the worst possible time?
He got up and made his way to his dresser to pick up his phone. He paused to clear his throat before answering.
“Miles Edgeworth.”
“Is this seriously how you answer your phone all the time? Even your cellphone?”
Miles blinked. “…Wright?”
“No, it’s the Pope… Of course it’s me!” Phoenix snorted. “Anyways, I was just calling to say I’m ready. When are you coming to pick me up?”
There it was again, that tingling sensation. If his voice alone had that much of an effect on him, he had no idea how he would manage to survive the whole night.
“Sorry, I didn’t check the caller ID. I would have answered in a more… friendly manner if I knew it was you.”
“…Is your brain lagging? You’re like a whole question behind.”
“Oh… sorry… I… uh…” Miles tried his hardest to remember what Phoenix had just asked him, but to no avail. “What were you saying?”
“…Are you sure you’re okay?” Phoenix asked, sounding concerned.
Miles sighed. “I’m fine. I just didn’t get much sleep.”
“When do you ever get any sleep?”
“I’m not as sleep-deprived as you seem to think I am, Wright,” Miles replied defensively.
“We both know that’s not true,” Phoenix retorted. “I worry about you sometimes.”
Miles felt his pulse rise slightly at that comment. “…You do?”
“Well, I mean, sometimes you look like you’re about to faint. You’re obviously not sleeping eight hours a night.”
Miles frowned. “Don’t exaggerate, I’m never that bad. Besides, why do you care so much about my sleeping habits?”
“I don’t! I mean… I do! I mean…” Phoenix paused. “Just don’t make yourself sick, okay?”
You really do worry too much.
“I’ll be fine.”
Phoenix sighed. “You always say that… But I know there’s no point in arguing, so… when are you picking me up?”
Miles looked at his watch. Eight twenty-three. The movie was starting at nine thirty and it would take about half an hour to go pick up Wright and get to the cinema.
“I’ll leave in five minutes.”
“Alright, see you in a bit.”
“Goodbye.”
Miles hung up the phone and breathed a sigh of relief. He had managed to get through that phone call without sounding too much like an idiot. Now he only had to get through the whole night with Wright sitting right next to him. This looked promising.
He shook his head and grabbed his keys and wallet from his night table. He pocketed the latter along with his phone and walked over to the mirror to take one last glance at his reflection, before leaving the room and heading for the back door.
As he stepped out, he was surprised to see that the sun had yet to set. He’d been so preoccupied that he hadn’t noticed how long the days had gotten. Not that it really mattered considering he spent most of his evenings in the office, but he’d always found short days depressing so the thought alone was kind of nice.
Miles quickly locked the door behind him and, as he started making his way down the stairs, he found that he was actually looking forward to the evening. Normally, he would have dreaded having to spend the night with Everett, but this time, it seemed that seeing Wright was the only thing that really mattered.
He finally reached his car and got in. After quickly fastening his seatbelt, he went to turn on the ignition, but paused to glance at the rear-view mirror. For some reason, he couldn’t help but smile at his reflection. Everything was going to be fine.
---
“Edgeworth, we’re doomed.”
Miles stopped trying to discreetly inspect the poster of the newest Steel Samurai movie and looked over at Phoenix. He had one of the cinema’s promotional leaflets open in his hand.
“Well done on managing to state the obvious, Wright.”
“No, seriously, we’re doomed,” Phoenix repeated. He flicked back a page and started to read out loud, “‘Dusk is an atmospheric, modern-day love story between a teenage girl, stuck in ordinary reality, and a mysterious demon from another hidden world--’”
“I think we gathered that it’s not going to have the most original plot,” Miles pointed out.
Phoenix glanced up. “Yeah, but that’s not all of it. Wait till you hear the review…” He turned the page and seemed to find the spot he was looking for. “‘The movie closely follows the roots of the best-selling teen novel and will have many teenage girls wishing they too could be in the arms of the hunky demon hero!’”
Miles frowned. “You can’t be serious.” He took the leaflet from Phoenix to scan the review section. “My God, they actually used the word ‘hunky’.”
Phoenix laughed. “I never thought I’d say this, but it looks like I’m going to have to agree with Kath’s sister. This movie looks awful!”
That’s an understatement if ever I heard one.
“You may well agree, but honestly, she’s the last person who should be calling something awful,” Miles replied dryly, placing the leaflet back on the stand nearby.
Had he been completely open, he would have used much stronger language to describe Beth’s blatant homophobia towards them. He had remained as passive as possible in Kath’s house, not wanting to rise to the bait or show any signs of weakness, but in retrospect, he kind of wished he hadn’t. After all, the woman wasn’t worth the patience it took to listen to her ignorant opinions.
“Don’t get me started.” Phoenix shook his head. “She needs to learn some fucking decency and to keep her disgusting comments to herself.”
How eloquent… I couldn’t have phrased it any better myself.
“I think it’s safe to say that I’m not the one still stuck in the dark ages on this topic,” Miles said with an air of haughtiness.
Phoenix chuckled. “Well, I guess if she really loves Enrique, she’ll have to start acting as modern-minded as you, Edgeworth.”
Miles raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”
“He called me ‘babe’,” Phoenix replied, smirking.
“And that automatically makes him gay?”
“No! No, I was just… He told me he was bisexual.”
Miles frowned. “Bisexual?”
If that’s the case, then why the hell did that woman treat us the way she did!?
I guess she must not know…
…Wait.
“Why exactly did he tell you that he’s bisexual?”
Phoenix blinked. “…Because he is?”
There was a pause as Miles simply looked at Phoenix, arms crossed, and Phoenix stared back, clearly confused.
“Whoa, wait, you don’t think that he…?” A grin formed on Phoenix’s face as Miles’ frown deepened. “Aww, don’t be jealous, Edgeworth. His pick-up lines had nothing on yours.”
Jealous…!?
What on Earth made him think that!? Why would I be jealous? Maybe I just thought it was strange for a man who’s engaged to be married to hit on someone’s boyfriend!
…Who am I kidding?
Shit, he doesn’t suspect anything, does he?
…God. I need to stop being so paranoid. Wright is always making stupid jokes like that.
I seriously need to get over myself.
Pushing his thoughts to the side, Miles rolled his eyes. “Don’t be such an idiot, Wright.”
Phoenix laughed. “Hey, I’m not the one jumping to conclusions! He just asked me for some advice, Edgeworth. Apparently, he loves Beth, for some reason, and doesn’t know if he should tell her his little secret.”
“Let me guess. You told him to tell her, didn’t you?” Miles said, unimpressed.
“Well, I said that if she loved him, then I don’t see how it would affect how she feels about him…”
Miles sighed. “You’re so bloody simple sometimes.”
“You think I’m wrong?”
“As beautiful as the notion of ‘love conquers all’ is, Wright, it’s simply a load of rubbish.”
Phoenix frowned. “Wow, Edgeworth, it’s pretty sad that you’ve already predetermined that.”
You really have no idea…
“I think that watching Dusk might change your mind,” Miles commented, keen on changing the subject. “It sounds so stomach-churning that it’s likely to make you sick at the simple mention of ‘happily ever after’.”
“You make a very good point,” Phoenix admitted. “Still, as awful as it is, coming to watch it is a worthy sacrifice.”
Miles raised an eyebrow. “A worthy sacrifice? What on Earth could be worth witnessing this atrocity?”
I’m starting to doubt my reasons for coming if he seriously deems the movie worth watching.
“Ah… well… you know…” Phoenix trailed off, clearing his throat. “Well, it’s… err… good to get away from all that work back at home, I guess…”
Miles crossed his arms, smirking. “That could have been convincing if you were talking to someone who doesn’t know you. I doubt you even have work at the office, never mind at your house, Wright.”
“Hey! I could have loads in both of those places!” Phoenix said in weak defence. “I could have five cases on the go for all you know!” He paused. “Yeah… Well, I guess I don’t really… have any…”
God knows how he manages to pay his bills…
Phoenix sighed. “Alright, alright! Don’t take this the wrong way or anything…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess I believe it’s worth using our situation so I… well… so I can spend time with you - even if it means having to watch a shitty movie.”
Is he serious?
There I was, getting anxious about wanting to spend time with him, and it turns out I was just overthinking everything…
…Not that that’s anything new.
“I guess having an excuse to spend time with my idiotic friend is nearly worth the sacrifice of being mentally scarred for life,” Miles replied.
Phoenix grinned. “And here was I thinking you didn’t care, Edgey-baby.”
Before Miles could even contemplate a retort, he felt someone run behind him and suddenly went blind as hands covered his eyes.
“Guess who!” Kath’s voice greeted cheerfully.
Oh, for Christ’s sake…
“Everett, what are you doing?”
He heard Kath huff from behind him. “You’re too good, Miles!” She released him from her clutches, allowing him to see once again. “Apart from it’s Kath, not Everett.”
Miles frowned. “Kath, you’re late.”
“Oh? I thought I was early!” She checked her watch. “Didn’t we say half past?”
“Well, the movie starts at half past,” Phoenix said, pointing unhelpfully at the cinema.
Kath looked startled. “What!? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We better get the tickets straight away!” She grabbed Miles by the arm and tugged, leading him and the trailing Phoenix into the cinema lobby.
Noticing the long queue for the ticket booth, Kath started jogging to reach the end, still pulling Miles along with her. After nearly stumbling twice, he finally managed to shake off her hold. Kath carried on at the same pace towards the back of the line and Miles saw her forcibly cut in front of two teenage girls who were just about to join.
I don’t believe her sometimes…
“Come on, guys! Stop being so slow!” she called over to Miles and Phoenix.
It was deeply embarrassing to join Kath in her acquired spot. Miles did his best to ignore the glares of the young girls behind them and glanced over at Phoenix, who was trying to hide his face by rubbing his cheek with his whole palm.
“Everett, was the rush really necessary?” Miles asked. “The trailers take up the first ten minutes of the screening and it hasn’t even started yet.”
“Don’t be silly, Miles,” Kath replied with a swish of her hand. That was apparently enough to explain her actions as she said nothing more until they reached the front of the queue.
The man behind the ticket desk smiled at them as they approached. “Hello, how can I help y--”
“Three tickets for Dusk!” Kath almost shouted at him, hopping excitedly from one foot to the other.
She’s even more immature than Larry…
Thankfully, the man looked amused by her exuberance and didn’t seem fazed by her rude interruption. “Is that the nine thir--”
“Yes, yes, the nine thirty showing. There are tickets left, right?”
Miles looked at Phoenix. He hadn’t even contemplated the fact that the tickets might be sold out. Their lives may have been spared!
“You’re in luck; there are a dozen tickets left for that showing,” the cashier answered, squashing Miles’ dream. “Two adults and a child, is it?”
Phoenix snorted with barely contained laughter.
“Oh, no, it’s three adults.” Kath was obviously too busy trying to get her wallet out of her purse to notice the small jibe from the cashier.
“Sorry, my mistake.” The cashier turned to his till monitor and pressed a few things on the screen. “That’s thirty-six dollars all together.”
I can’t believe we actually have to pay to watch this thing.
Miles sighed and pulled his wallet out of his jeans’ pocket to flick through his notes, deciding to pass twenty-five dollars over to Kath. Quicker than a flash, the money was added to her contribution and shoved in the cashier’s hand to be exchanged for the dreaded tickets.
“Off we go! We’ve got to get good seats!” Kath exclaimed, ushering them away from the ticket desk.
“W-wait, I haven’t even paid for the--” Phoenix cut himself off as he looked up from his wallet that he’d only just managed to pull out of his pocket. He stared at the tickets in Kath’s hand. “Oh.”
“That’s so cute! Miles paid for you without you even noticing, Mr. Wright!” She seemed pretty intent on getting to the movie, however, as she grabbed Miles’ arm and started pulling him towards the theatre, pausing only to hand Phoenix one of the tickets. “Miles and I will find us some seats. You can go and get us some popcorn.”
Great. I always look forward to spending some time alone with Everett.
Before either of them could even begin to protest, she’d dragged Miles most of the way to the door of theatre two. He managed to shake her off before they reached the usher, giving him a brief pause to recollect himself.
“I presume you’ve been looking forward to this, Everett?” Miles asked dryly as he handed his ticket over to get ripped in half.
Kath looked at him, a big smile on her face. “It’s going to be the best movie ever, I just know it!”
Her deep enthusiasm could have been endearing, if it weren’t for the fact that he also had to go in and watch the movie with her.
Kath rushed forward, beckoning Miles to follow, and made her way up to the middle rows in the middle column. The third seat in seemed to please her as she settled down and gestured for Miles to sit next to her.
“I thought the back seats were more conventionally thought to be the best?” Miles said after sitting down.
“Oh, no, Miles. If you go too far back, you miss some of the intricate details!” she replied with a knowing look. “However, I’m sure when you and Mr. Wright watch a movie, they’re the best by far.”
…I presume she’s insinuating something degrading there.
Miles frowned. “Right… Of course.”
Kath suddenly grabbed his arm, a look of disbelief on her face. “Miles! Don’t tell me you and Mr. Wright have had you know what in a theatre as well as all those other places!?”
Miles flinched away from her grasp. “No! Why would you… What on Earth made you think that!?”
What is it with this woman and intercourse in public places?
Seriously, in the back of a theatre? That’s just unhygienic! And exposed! And uncomfortable! And… well, it’s an idiotic idea all around, never mind the practicality.
Kath giggled. “Well, Mr. Wright seems like an adventurous kind of guy. It didn’t seem so outrageous to think you might have.”
I think you’ll find that, yes, outrageous is exactly how I’d describe that idea.
Miles rubbed his forehead in frustration. “Contrary to your beliefs, Phoenix and I have a lot more to our relationship than mindless physical interactions.”
“Oh, sure,” Kath replied, rolling her eyes. “Miles, you should know that you can’t fool me.”
Miles frowned. “Fool you?”
Kath grabbed his arm again, albeit a lot more gently than usual. “I can tell that you and Mr. Wright have very different takes on this relationship of yours, Miles. He’s dedicated his life to you and is always making efforts to keep your exciting romance alive!”
…Is that seriously what she thinks his apparent perversion represents?
“I hate to say it,” Kath continued, her expression turning sympathetic, “but he really is in love with you.”
Miles stared at her, at a complete loss for words. “I don’t… How… Why would that be a bad thing for our relationship?”
Kath sighed and patted his arm. “Oh, Miles, you don’t have to play dumb. It’s okay, I understand!” After yet another blank look from Miles, she sighed again. “People say you shouldn’t be in a relationship for sex alone, but sometimes the sex is just too good, am I right?”
Miles blinked.
“You think that I’m only with Phoenix… for sex.”
Kath nodded and smiled brightly. “There’s no need to be ashamed, Miles! We both know that your relationship can’t last forever so you may as well enjoy it before you have to break the poor guy’s heart.”
How can she say that so calmly!?
“Everett, y--”
“Don’t worry,” Kath interrupted, leaning towards him. “I won’t say anything. And if you ever feel like trying something different, I’m always here for you, Miles.”
…Great. Just great.
Of course she still thinks she has a chance with me; the whole fake gay relationship thing would only work on a sane person!
Miles pulled back and shook her hand off his arm. “Everett, you are sorely mistaken in every bit of your reasoning.”
Kath waved a hand. “Oh, come now, you can trust me to keep another one of your little secrets!”
“No, it’s not…” Miles trailed off. He turned to look at the screen, which had just started to show the trailers. Was he really prepared to admit something to her that he had barely come to terms with himself?
“Everett… I don’t know what I did to make you think that, but I’m not that kind of person.”
“Come on, Miles! Every time I ask you about your feelings for Mr. Wright, you change the subject!”
Miles turned to look at her and frowned. “…I do?”
“Oh, please!” She shook her head. “Mr. Wright keeps going on and on about how much he loves you, but the only thing you’ve ever said about him is that he’s good with his tongue.” She scoffed. “If that’s not a big, flashing red light, I don’t know what is!”
Miles opened his mouth to retort, but closed it again when nothing came out.
It’s true. All of it.
But how the hell was I supposed to know that I’d come across as some kind of heartless sex addict!?
He sighed.
I guess I have no choice.
“Look, Everett…” He paused, taking a moment to convince himself that he was ready to say it. “The truth is, I really lo--”
“Damn, looks like I missed the best part.”
Miles froze. He then slowly turned to see Phoenix standing at the end of the row, two boxes of popcorn in his hands.
Why do you always have to show up at the worst possible moment!?
Phoenix glanced back and forth between Miles and Kath, a look of unease spreading across his face. “Why are you both glaring at me like that?”
“That was very quick, Mr. Wright,” Kath commented in the flattest tone Miles had ever heard her use.
Funny, I thought it took him a lifetime…
“Err… yeah, I guess…” Phoenix hesitantly took the seat next to Miles and passed a box over to Kath. “Did I miss something?”
Miles shot him a look, warning him not to press this one.
Shrugging, Phoenix turned to watch the trailers. He grabbed a handful of popcorn, before offering Miles the box.
Miles shook his head and shifted in his seat slightly, watching Kath out of the corner of his eye. Thanks to Wright’s interruption, there was no way of knowing what she might do now.
“You alright?” Phoenix asked through a mouthful of popcorn.
“I just… feel a bit claustrophobic sitting in the middle of the row like this.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Claustrophobic?”
Miles tilted his head in Kath’s direction, hoping Phoenix would understand. When he merely took another handful of popcorn, Miles made a few more twitches, each one a bit more obvious than the last.
Come on, Wright, get the hint…
It suddenly seemed to click in his mind after the fifth gesture. “Oh! Yeah, that whole, um… claustrophobic… thing. You, err… want to switch?”
“I don’t think that’s necessary, Mr. Wr--”
“Thank you,” Miles answered quickly, standing up as soon as the words left his mouth.
It was hard to catch in the dark, but Miles saw Phoenix roll his eyes as he dropped his handful of popcorn back into the box and got up to give Miles his seat. After settling back down next to Kath, Phoenix leaned over to whisper in his ear, “You owe me big time for this, you know.”
Miles smirked. “Think of it as a repayment for dragging me to that party.”
“As if! You came willingly!” Phoenix argued.
“Willingly?” Miles scoffed. “I was emotionally blackmailed to attend.”
Phoenix frowned. “That’s unfair. You agreed that you weren’t trying very hard.”
“That still doesn’t mean I went willingly,” Miles replied, leaning back into his seat.
“You so did.”
“I did not.”
“Did.”
“Shush with the whispery flirting, guys,” Kath interrupted in a slightly quieter than normal voice. “The movie’s about to start!”
“See? I win!” Phoenix said with a triumphant grin.
Miles shook his head and smiled slightly.
If we were competing for who’s the biggest child, then yes, you did.
The opening credits started to roll on the screen, followed by the word ‘Dusk’, which appeared in big, glowing green letters, before fading out into some fog. A plane was seen approaching a landing strip, the camera then zooming in on a teenage girl sitting inside. She had long, dark brown hair and was wearing a blue hooded jacket. It was unclear where she was going, but she didn’t seem very enthusiastic about it.
The plane landed and the girl made her way into the airport, where she was met by her father and introduced as Bianca. They exchanged a few words about the bad weather, then started heading towards the car that was apparently abandoned a few blocks away because her father didn’t want to pay for parking.
After a few minutes of walking in silence, they finally reached the car. Miles wasn’t sure why the director had deemed it necessary to show them walking all the way there, but he figured that it must have been some intricate storytelling technique he didn’t understand. Bianca’s luggage was thrown into the trunk and they started driving towards what Miles presumed was her father’s house.
The following conversation proved his assumption to be true. Bianca was upset about her mother getting remarried and had decided to move to Spoons to live with her father. The discussion went on and on about which room Bianca would take, what her favorite meals were and when she would start school.
Miles sighed. Was all this information really necessary? And why did Bianca seem so apathetic towards everything? He swore her facial expression hadn’t changed once since the beginning of the movie.
How could anyone ever relate to her?
I thought movie characters were supposed to be likable…
The interminable scene finally faded back out into the fog and the camera panned down from the sky to reveal Bianca looking out of a classroom window. She was apparently oblivious to the fact that several teenage boys were staring at her.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” Phoenix mumbled. “It’s even set in a school and everything.”
“Where did you think it would be set, Wright? In court?” Miles whispered back.
“Well, it’s just so… young and… cliché and…” Phoenix gestured something stupid with his hands, before dropping them and letting out a sigh. “I feel old.”
Miles chuckled in reply. How could Wright, of all people, feel old? He had the mentality of a twelve-year-old at most.
“Look at this guy,” Phoenix commented as the boy sitting next to Bianca introduced himself as Edgar. “I don’t think he’s ever heard of this thing called the sun.”
“Some people actually have work to do and can’t afford to spend all their time outside,” Miles replied, not quite able to keep the defensive tone from his voice.
Phoenix grinned and patted Miles on the arm. “Of course, Edgeworth. I like my men pasty white, anyway.”
Miles rolled his eyes, making sure to be as dramatic as possible so Phoenix would catch the movement in the dark. Against his better judgement, he then decided to focus on the movie.
The scene played out with Edgar being the only guy not interested in Bianca. In fact, he seemed to really dislike her, to the point of making up an excuse about not feeling well to leave the classroom.
In the next scene, Bianca was shown making friends in the cafeteria. They told her that Edgar was extremely weird and that she should stay away from him. However, she did not seem to care, and as the scenes went on, she kept mentioning Edgar a lot more than was suitable after their fleeting conversation. She also seemed to be completely ungrateful to anyone who tried to help her.
“Well, I was willing to give this movie a chance,” Phoenix whispered, “but that girl’s really starting to grate on my nerves.”
“Don’t lie, Wright. Neither of us was ever going to give this movie a chance once we heard that Everett wanted to watch it.”
Phoenix laughed, probably louder than was courteous for those watching the movie. An evil look from Kath confirmed Miles’ suspicions. Phoenix turned his laugh into a cough and held his hand up in apology. With a shake of the head and a small smirk, Miles turned his attention back to the movie. He had paid for it, after all.
Bianca was now walking home from school and it was very dark and cloudy. She was looking down at her feet and didn’t seem to be paying attention to where she was going. She got to an intersection and started crossing the road when a tractor suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Unfortunately, she didn’t have a dramatic collision with it and was instead saved by Edgar, who jumped up really high and landed on the tractor, turning the wheel at the last second. The tractor hit another car, which went into the side of a truck, but apparently, that was all okay because Bianca was safe. Edgar then mysteriously disappeared, leaving the wreckage for someone else to deal with.
That has got to be the worst life-saving act I’ve ever witnessed, and I’ve seen a fair amount in my line of work!
-Bring bring, bring bring-
Miles glanced in the direction of the sudden noise and noticed that everyone around him was doing the same.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
The man whose phone it was, realising that everyone was staring at him, started frantically searching every pocket, even going as far as to check his hood.
-Bring bring, bring bring-
“Will you shut that fucking phone off!?” Kath screeched, making all the people around her jump. She stood up and pointed her finger in the man’s direction. “We are trying to watch the movie! How much of an inconsiderate jerk are you to take away from our viewing rights!? We paid for those tickets, you know!”
“Miss Everett, I think that’s enou--”
“You should be ashamed of yourself!” Kath continued, ignoring Phoenix’s attempt to quell her rage. “It’s common friggin’ courtesy to turn your damned phone off in a theatre!”
“You’re going to get us thrown out if you keep shouting, Everett,” Miles said, half wishing that she would manage to alert the ushers.
Kath looked down at Miles, an angry look on her face. “Some people just need telling, Miles!”
The ringing stopped. “Sorry, thought I had it on silent,” the man muttered, obviously embarrassed.
“It’s okay, no harm done,” Kath said calmly, smoothing her skirt down and sitting back in her seat.
I would not like to get on the wrong side of this insane woman…
Miles shared a quick glance with Phoenix and they both smirked. They had obviously had the same thought.
He turned back to the movie again. It seemed as though Bianca had been doing some research. According to her findings, two different tribes were believed to have been living in the town for centuries. One of them was composed of people related to cats and the other had apparently come from a dark, underground domain.
“Imagine being related to a cat,” Phoenix said, putting his empty popcorn box on the floor. “Their breath must stink.”
Miles looked down at the box, then back up at Phoenix. “Are you going to leave that there?”
“…Yes?”
“That’s littering.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “So? We’re in a theatre. It’s dark.”
“If that is the general population’s consensus, I really don’t want to be sitting on this seat,” Miles said, feeling the top of his armrests, before quickly taking his hands away when he found something sticky.
Phoenix chuckled. “You don’t know the half of it, Edgeworth.”
Don’t worry, Wright. Everett has already done an excellent job of making sure I know how dirty these places are…
Bianca was on her way home from meeting her friends when she ran into a hooded man. She gave him an evil look and tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm and pushed up her sleeve, revealing her watch. She struggled and tried to scream, only to have the man cover her mouth with his hand. He told her to empty her pockets, but as soon as he had spoken, Edgar appeared and wrestled him to the floor, saving Bianca again.
They decided to have coffee together and, after a lot of talking, Bianca brought up the research she had done on the history of Spoons. She asked him if he was one of those ‘dark creatures’. Edgar didn’t answer and instead took her to a cave just outside of town. As they walked deeper into the cave, he started to glow.
That doesn’t seem evolutionarily advantageous.
Miles rubbed his temples - maybe he was getting tired and his sleepy vision was causing the whole picture to glow? Unfortunately, the next scene explained that Edgar did indeed glow in the dark. He was a nice demon who, instead of doing the Devil’s work, helped keep peace in the world.
Miles sighed.
This just keeps getting better and better…
After a few more scenes, he realised that Kath had been quiet for a while. He checked his watch to see how much time had gone by. Not a word in half an hour.
That’s got to be some kind of record.
He tilted his head towards Phoenix and whispered, “We should bring her here more often.”
He expected him to add something or at least laugh, but when he did neither, Miles turned to him, only to find him asleep, his head slouched forward slightly.
Miles raised an eyebrow.
Really?
He turned back to the screen.
I’m not sure how he can sleep through the noise, but I can’t exactly blame him.
I was by no means expecting a masterpiece, but this is beyond bad.
Letting out a sigh, he brought his attention back to Phoenix.
Even asleep, Miles could make out a faint smile on his lips and he looked strangely relaxed for someone having to sit through this atrocity.
After studying his face for a moment, it suddenly occurred to Miles that this was the first time he’d seen Wright asleep since the sleepovers they had as children. He remembered they would talk for hours after going to bed and get told several times to go to sleep because no matter how quiet they thought they were being, their parents always managed to hear them. Then, at some point, the conversation would slowly die down until only a few sparse words were spoken, and they’d wake up the next day not remembering falling asleep.
Miles felt a smile tug at his lips as those memories came back to him.
The more he looked, though, the less familiar this felt. Watching Wright sleep seemed a lot more interesting now than it did back then. Especially after what happened at Everett’s party.
How much of an accident was it, really?
Miles shivered at the thought and felt a sudden urge to get closer. Before he had time to reconsider, he shifted in his seat until his shoulder was resting against Phoenix’s.
The warmth was overwhelming.
Without thinking, he shifted a bit more and rested his head on Phoenix’s shoulder.
It was a few seconds before his brain started working again. But just as he was about to mentally kick himself, Phoenix seemed to react to his actions and tilted his head sideways, resting it on top of his head.
Miles didn’t know what to think. Had he woken up? Was that just a reflex?
“Wright…?” he whispered hesitantly.
“Mmm…” Phoenix mumbled.
His response just left Miles even more confused. He decided not to pursue it, however, afraid that any more talking would cause Phoenix to move again.
As much as he usually despised physical contact, he could definitely get used to this. Never had he imagined that he would - or could - get that close to someone. And never had he expected that someone to be Wright, but he realised now that there was no point in fighting it. This felt right and that was all that really mattered.
Maybe I’ve been too pessimistic?
He did say several times that he enjoys spending time with me… And he’s constantly worried about me being mad at him… And he keeps making all these jokes…
Has he been trying to tell me something?
Miles quickly dismissed the thought.
Perhaps I’m being slightly too optimistic.
He decided it was probably better not to ponder it too much for now. Time would tell, and at the moment, all that mattered were that warm shoulder and that head resting on top of his.
A moment went by. Wright hadn’t moved an inch so Miles decided to try and make sense of what was going on in the movie. He found the whole thing rather absurd - since when did demons glow in the dark? But to be fair, he wasn’t an expert when it came to fantasy lore, and his attention at the moment was anything but undivided.
From what he understood, Bianca was getting frustrated because Edgar kept telling her that it was too dangerous for them to be together.
And now they were going to play t-ball with Edgar’s family.
…I give up.
Miles turned his attention back to Phoenix. He couldn’t see his face but he could tell from the way he was breathing that he was still sound asleep.
He closed his eyes. This was probably the closest thing to comfort he’d ever felt. It was kind of sad, he realised, considering where they were, but that thought was quickly cast aside. He felt so relaxed he started wondering if having Wright this close at night would cure his insomnia. It sure seemed like it at the moment, as he felt as though he could fall asleep at any second.
And to think that a week ago, I panicked whenever Wright got too close.
He smiled.
I couldn’t have been more wrong. This is--
-BOOM-
Miles jumped in his seat and looked around, alarmed, before realising that the noise had come from a thunderstorm in the movie.
He breathed a sigh of relief and rubbed his forehead.
That was unnecessarily loud…
“I guess I fell asleep?”
Miles turned to Phoenix, who was looking at him expectantly.
Shit. I hope he didn’t notice.
“Indeed, you did,” he replied cautiously.
Phoenix smiled and turned back to the screen. He squinted a bit, before rubbing vigorously at his eyes. “So what did I miss?” he asked, blinking a few times to clear his vision.
That was a good question. What had he missed? Not only did Miles not know when Phoenix had fallen asleep, but he also hadn’t really been paying attention.
“Nothing of interest,” Miles replied quickly in an attempt to avoid the question.
Phoenix chuckled. “Obviously.” He turned back to Miles. “But seriously, I want to know.”
Christ.
“Well… um…” Miles racked his brains to remember what had happened in this sorry excuse for a movie. “The girl is an idiot and the guy glows in the dark.”
Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Yeah… I know that.” He glanced at the screen, then back at Miles. “You haven’t been watching, have you?”
“I have, but this thing makes no sense whatsoever.” Miles sighed. “I don’t know what to tell you.”
Phoenix smirked. “So you’re telling me that you can solve the most complicated cases but you can’t make sense of a chick flick?”
“You mean I can’t make sense out of something that’s completely devoid of it,” Miles retorted.
Phoenix laughed. “Fair enough. But you totally weren’t watching.”
Miles frowned. “Sure I was. The girl was trying to convince the demon that they should be together and then they went to play t-ball.”
Phoenix pointed at the screen. “You mean what they’re doing right now?”
Miles turned to see Bianca fail to hit the ball off the tee. Twice. She then started laughing at her own clumsiness, resulting in comments from all of Edgar’s family about how cute she was.
I think I’m going to be sick.
He turned back to Phoenix, who was smiling at him.
“What?”
Phoenix shook his head. “Nothing. It’s just…” He looked at Miles for a few seconds, before turning his attention back to the movie.
Well…?
“It’s just… what?” Miles insisted, realising that Phoenix wasn’t going to finish his sentence.
“It’s nothing, really. It’s just…” Phoenix turned back to him, before looking down at the floor. “I’m not sure how to say this without sounding stupid, but…” He looked back up at him and smiled sheepishly. “I thought you looked… I don’t know… happy? Well, in a ‘Why am I stuck here watching this garbage?’ sort of way, anyways.”
I looked… happy?
“Speaking of which,” Phoenix added, “look.” He leaned back in his seat and gestured towards Kath, who seemed rather absorbed in the movie.
You’re just noticing this now?
“Are you actually surprised that she likes it?”
Phoenix smirked. “No, but I figured she was enjoying it enough for all three of us.”
Miles blinked. He turned to look down at the exit, then back at Phoenix. “You don’t mean…?”
“I’ll take the blame, as usual.”
I suppose there’s no point in staying here.
Miles nodded. “Let’s go.”
He carefully got up from his seat, making sure not to block the view of the people behind him, and started heading down the steps towards the exit.
“Is she looking?” Phoenix whispered from close behind, one step away from the door to freedom.
Looking over his shoulder, Miles spotted Kath, who looked deeply engrossed. She had the strangest smile on her face. He took a glance at the screen and, lo and behold, Bianca and Edgar were kissing.
Miles rolled his eyes. “No, we’re clear.”
They reached the exit and almost simultaneously breathed a sigh of relief.
“The next time we go to the theatre, we choose the movie,” Phoenix stated with a laugh as they walked back towards the lobby.
Next time…?
Miles smiled. “I think I can promise that.”
Phoenix looked at him for a moment, then shook his head. “At least this means you can get back to the massive workload you have back at home. No slacking for you tonight!”
You don’t know what slacking is until you’ve seen me try to choose a bloody tie.
“Actually, I’m not due back in court until Monday,” Miles replied. “I think winding down with a cup of tea and a crossword will do me just fine tonight.”
Phoenix chuckled. “Only you, Edgeworth. Only you.”
Miles frowned. “What do you mean by that?”
Phoenix opened his mouth to answer, then closed it again as something behind Miles seemed to catch his eye. “Oh, boy…”
“Nick!?”
Miles spun around. There stood Maya, dressed in a Steel Samurai outfit without the mask. She was surrounded by a sea of people, most of whom were also dressed up as various characters.
“Nick!” she shouted again, waving and walking over to them. “And Mr. Edgeworth?” She stared at them for a moment, a puzzled look on her face. “What are you two doing here?”
“Well, we…” Miles looked at Phoenix, who simply stared back, eyes wide. “Well, you know…”
“Ah, yeah, err…” Phoenix gestured between the two of them. “We were just…”
“You see, it was…” Miles trailed off again.
“…Yeah,” Phoenix finished with a distinct lack of conviction.
Maya raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “You know, considering you’re lawyers, you’re both amazingly bad at thinking up a decent lie on the spot.”
Phoenix rubbed the back of his neck. “What, err, makes you think we’re trying to lie?”
…She has a very good point.
“Come off it! You’re so obvious even Pearly would notice!” Maya scrutinised them both. “So why are you acting so shifty?”
“We’re not acting shifty, Maya. You’re just reading into things too much…” Phoenix cleared his throat. “Why are you here, anyway?”
“Isn’t it obvious? I was queuing for the limited edition poster of the new Steel Samurai movie!” She waved the poster tube in her hand. “They’re giving them out for free to the first one hundred fans to show up. It’s coming out on June 7th! In five days!”
“Actually, it comes out on Friday June 8th,” Miles said coolly.
“Well, yeah, that’s for the general public, but the premiere… Wait, you’re a fan too, Mr. Edgeworth!?” Maya looked both shocked and ecstatic. “You’ve got to check out my signed spear pen!” She reached into her pocket and brought out a scaled-down version of the Steel Samurai’s spear, which she proceeded to thrust in front of Miles’ face.
And there goes all my dignity in one fell swoop…
“Lovely,” Miles commented. “But you have me wrong. I saw the date on that poster.” He pointed just behind Maya.
Phoenix smirked. “Oh, of course that’s how you knew the date.”
“Shut up, Wright.”
Maya turned to look where Miles was pointing, before giving them both the same piercing look as before. “Wait a minute… I know why you were both acting so shifty!”
…She worked it out from that!?
Phoenix glanced at Miles, his expression mirroring what Miles was thinking. “I-I… well…”
“You know I wouldn’t have minded if you’d told me right away, Nick! In fact, this is awesome news! Ooh!” Maya clapped her hands together, making both of them flinch. “We could trade!”
“T-trade!?” Phoenix exclaimed.
“Alright, keep your pants on. I know some people get attached to their cards, but geez, no need to bite my head off…”
Phoenix blinked. “Oh, right… cards. Obviously.”
Miles looked away, steadying his heartbeat.
Christ, what happened to my logic levels? Of course she didn’t work out why we were here just from that! I’m getting really paranoid lately…
…Damn you, Wright.
“It’s going to be so cool!” Maya continued. “You don’t need to be embarrassed about liking a kids’ show, you know! Tons of oldies come to the conventions!”
“Look, Maya, we weren’t here for the free post--Hey! What do you mean by ‘oldies’?”
“Of course you weren’t.” Maya winked. “Once a Steel Samurai fan, always a Steel Samurai fan! I’m afraid they’ve run out, though… But it’s okay, we can put mine in the office!”
Phoenix looked the opposite of thrilled at that idea.
“That’s a shame.” Miles put a hand on Phoenix’s shoulder. “You were really looking forward to your new poster.”
Maya put a hand to her mouth in sympathy. “Aww, Nick, I didn’t realise. I would have saved one for you if I knew!” She looked over her shoulder, then back at Phoenix. “I’ll go double-check for you. You never know, they could have counted wrong.”
As she wandered over to the stand, Phoenix turned to Miles with a smirk. “When did you develop a sense of humour?”
Miles shrugged. “Maybe it’s just amusing to see you uncomfortable outside of court as well as inside it.”
Phoenix scoffed. “Don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m always as cool as a cucumber.”
So that’s why you’re always drenched in sweat when you’re on the back foot…
“Keep telling yourself that, Wright.”
Maya came rushing back, looking forlorn. “Nope, not a single one.”
“That’s a shame. Edgeworth was just telling me how much he needed one to add to his collection,” Phoenix replied with feigned regret.
Miles sent him a disapproving look.
You could at least try to be original.
“Sucks,” Maya said with a frown. “But now that you’re here, we can have a burger date, Nick!”
Phoenix rolled his eyes. “Not burgers again…”
“Date?” Miles asked, eyebrows raised.
“Not that kind of date, Mr. Edgeworth,” Maya replied quickly. She put a hand to the side of her mouth and leaned over to whisper in his ear, “Nick has a proper girlfriend for that.”
There was a pause as Miles digested the information, trying his hardest not to overthink Maya’s comment.
Wright definitely doesn’t have a girlfriend, and he certainly hasn’t told Maya about me…
So where on Earth did she get that from!?
“Hey, Maya! You know it’s rude to whisper about someone who’s standing right in front of you.”
Maya giggled. “Whatever you say.” She winked at Miles, who didn’t really see the situation as something to wink over. “So… burgers?”
Phoenix eyed her suspiciously. “Right… Well, I don’t think Edgeworth will be up fo--”
“Nonsense,” Miles cut across. “Let’s go get something to eat. I think we deserve it after the day we’ve had.”
Phoenix laughed. “You know, I’m still not used to you being social.”
Miles ignored Phoenix’s comment and turned to Maya. “Where would you like to go? My treat.”
“Really, Mr. Edgeworth!?”
“Really.”
Maya clapped her hands together. “Awesome! I know this great burger joint down the road. Follow me!”
“Wait,” Phoenix cut in. “Are you sure you want to go to the restaurant dressed like that?”
Maya looked down at her costume then back up at Phoenix, a confused look on her face. “Your point?”
Phoenix sighed. “Never mind…”
Maya shrugged, then started jogging ahead.
When she was out of earshot, Phoenix turned to Miles. “What did she say to you? Do I have reason to be as paranoid as I am right now?”
“She said… well…” Miles turned to look at Phoenix.
I don’t think I want to know the truth right now. Just in case…
“Nothing.”
Phoenix rolled his eyes. “Alright, fine, don’t tell me.” He sighed and remained silent for a moment, before speaking up again. “You know, I’d tell you if anyone said anything about you.”
He’s such a child…
Miles shook his head. “People can say what they like about me, Wright.”
“I’m going to make sure they spit in your burger,” Phoenix replied, trying his hand at blackmail.
“I’m fairly sure they spit in all the burgers,” Miles countered. “That’s what they mean by ‘special sauce’.”
Phoenix laughed. “Nice. That sounds about as appealing as that movie we had to sit through.”
Miles smirked.
I’m sure spit burgers would still have more taste than whoever picked the lead actress for that movie.