Words & Feelings.
I think I've lost the ability to trust, or even the ability to want to trust anyone. Besides the people that have proven to me that they can be trusted with anything in the world. I know I trust myself. I trust myself not to make stupid decisions and be careful about the ones that I believe are smart. I'm human. I feel just as every other human does. Sometimes I forget that. Heh...how stupid of me right? Sometimes I forget that I am human. Then again, sometmes I think that isn't such a bad thing. Not with some of the ones I've let myself trust.
Always just a sip. Never a full glass. Always just a taste. Never a whole piece. Always just a brush. never a real kiss.
I'm no where near weak. There are a few of you that completely understand my words when I say that. That in no way means that I don't hurt. That in no way means that I don't feel completely different to what I act. I've just grown aquainted with only showing the people I know I can trust and believe how I truly feel. I could have a smile on my face, and only a select few could see the seemingly invisable tears run down my cheek. Sure. Emo.Emo.Emo....
Or maybe I just really, really hurt.
And all the less-than-stellar aquaintences and my life, like a group of best-buy salesmen swarm me with chants of "Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle!" BUT...I do not WANT to settle, Mr. Reed. I want what FEELS right. I want what I live for. I want what I feel like I deserve. Sure that may not be much to some people out there. But to me....its more than to settle for something I don't want.
...and its right there. A hand-hold away. A bear-hug away. A kiss away.
-sigh-
"Sorry Stephen, just a sip, son. You're not ready for this kind of happiness booze. It'll kick your ass and put hair on your chest."
Yes I am.
I am ready....
Peace and Love
Always just a sip. Never a full glass. Always just a taste. Never a whole piece. Always just a brush. never a real kiss.
I'm no where near weak. There are a few of you that completely understand my words when I say that. That in no way means that I don't hurt. That in no way means that I don't feel completely different to what I act. I've just grown aquainted with only showing the people I know I can trust and believe how I truly feel. I could have a smile on my face, and only a select few could see the seemingly invisable tears run down my cheek. Sure. Emo.Emo.Emo....
Or maybe I just really, really hurt.
And all the less-than-stellar aquaintences and my life, like a group of best-buy salesmen swarm me with chants of "Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle!" BUT...I do not WANT to settle, Mr. Reed. I want what FEELS right. I want what I live for. I want what I feel like I deserve. Sure that may not be much to some people out there. But to me....its more than to settle for something I don't want.
...and its right there. A hand-hold away. A bear-hug away. A kiss away.
-sigh-
"Sorry Stephen, just a sip, son. You're not ready for this kind of happiness booze. It'll kick your ass and put hair on your chest."
Yes I am.
I am ready....
Peace and Love