Put on your pretty lies, you're in the city of wonder
Yes, i did just use Disturbia lyrics for the subject. But Punk Goes Pop 2 has been blasting from my speakers since i got home. I love The Cab, their cover definitely is my favorite. I like a lot of them but rihanna has always been one of my guilty pleasures. and two britney songs? you know the way to my heart <3 (Yes, i know that Toxic isnt an
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I know it can sometimes seem like you're moving backwards, when you're watching from the inside. But I don't think you are. I know I can't read your mind, but Caitlyn, you have made so many changes in your life, changes that YOU'VE made, ones that YOU decided to make. You're moving forward. Every time you think about cutting and don't? That's a step forward, believe me.
Anger is healthy. If feeling it makes you feel sick like this, try something to get rid of it. Scream, punch something, play soccer, write (and no one even has to read it). About the headaches: I think a lot of the pressure you have on you you put on yourself. Breathe, baby, you're fine. You're doing well in school, and you're making fucking progress, so just step back and take a deep breath.
About your dad: we've talked about this, and you're the one who really made me realize it. He's a part of who you are, and you can't ever not love him, you know? You don't have to like him, not at all, but you're not going to wake up one day not loving him. Believe me, I know how hard this is, though my situation isn't nearly as bad as yours.
Just because you're not happy now doesn't mean you'll never be. And Gabe also said that if you're a good person and you work hard (both of which are true of you) you'll end up okay. And you will. Know that tons of people love you, and don't give up, bb. You are precious, you are wanted, you are loved. I love you. I hope tomorrow is better for you.
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I really am moving backwards. like you said, you cant read my mind. I am back in the 5th grade. I was being to fucking emo today to really enjoy Lauren coming over. It was for fucked up reasons why she was here and its much worse for her yet im not the greatest at dealing. Im not as strong as id like people to think i am.
And i need to do something and if thats making life harder for me than fine. Id rather have regrets of letting myself get in the way of my dreams, not hating anyone else for my past mistakes. And this way theres no one i am forced to talk to deal with all of this.
I know i have to figure this out on my own but i havent found a way to yet.
What can i say, im a hypocrite. Ask amanda, i give great advice. But do i take any of it in and use it to help myself? Of course not. And im probably the one who needs it most.
I havent given up yet. Im stubborn and if anything, definitely not a quitter.
I love you too. And i have been waiting for tomorrow for a long time. But hope never killed anyone right?
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Bb, it's not your fault if you can't enjoy your sister's presence if she's not there for a good reason. There's reason to be emo about it. But you posting on lj like this IS your way of dealing with it, and its a good way. Don't worry about dealing with it. You thinking, posting about it, this IS dealing. And you don't have to be strong all the time. We all have our weak moments, especially me.
Making your life harder for yourself isn't a healthy way to deal. You don't need to regret, Caitlyn, you have your whole life ahead of you. You're brilliant, you're an awesome person, you're so fucking amazing. Fuck the past, you know? Fuck it. It's now, and you shouldn't blame yourself. You don't have to do this on your own. There are tons of people who love you and want to help you. You just have to say something.
You really are, bb. And that's a wonderful trait to have, to be honest.
Hope never killed anyone? Hope is what keeps people living.
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But thanks bb. I love you :)
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Of course, my love. I love you too. :)
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unless you have too much work?
~new icon!
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So cute! Bden, how so adorable?
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