This and that.
So I am a little sad over one of the boyos I had left behind last month. More than I thought I would be. Especially since when I've talked to him lately, I am nothing but angry. I do not chase, and I do not tolerate poor treatment and I found myself wanting to do just that. Well, really, I wanted him to step up and do right by the fact that I was more than an one-night stand or someone he'd been on one or two casual dates with. So through his word on helping with my website, I gave him opportunity after opportunity to man up, and hell, just do what he said he would with my site. 
It is infuriating that he failed, both in that he's okay with treating me like this and that I tried so much. All the same, I wish things had turned out differently, which is as annoying as it is true.
Admittedly, I do know that there are some qualities that make me love people a little more than I would otherwise. Things like:
x Being more than 3" taller than me (because I've been 5'11 since I was 12, feeling short is rare for me)
o Being from Texas, East/Central Texas, Dallas/Houston/San Antonio/Austin. Because ATX = ♥
ox Alternatively, being from the same county that I grew up. Because we're a rare find.
x Being left-handed (because we are rare and awesome)
o Having ADHD/an entrepreneurial mindset (because it's hard to keep up with the speed of my thoughts)
x Being really, really intelligent (because I'm a wicked smart nerd and I love people who are smarter than I am)
o Having skills that I envy, which can be any number of things as my desire to do things is wide and varied
x Not being content to be idle (because I will never be content with someone who will spend days watching DVDs and TV shows while merely sitting still)
o Chivalry makes me drool, I will admit it (and no, you cannot revoke my feminist card. :P)
x Mad kissing skills (because it's one of my two favorite things to do)
xo Idle kisses on my nose/forehead/top of my head (because I am not only a siren)
o Extensive travel/expatriot experience (because I love stories about other places)
Yeah, I'm not sure where this was going, it's been a long day. So let's move on to something else.
So I have this wonky work schedule. I work long days 3-4 days/week. Which means I don't normally see anyone during my work week (if I do, it's either short or it fucks up my sleep/ability to get to work on time the next day), so the 3-4 days off I have each week, this is what I do with them:
-- attempt to catch up on sleep
-- unADHD my house for the week
-- household chores
-- laundry
-- see my family
-- see my friends, specifically my two bffs but really could be anyone of my acquaintance within reasonable driving distance
-- date
-- forward progress on various on-going website/online class/marketing/yarn projects
-- unpack boxes/do projects on my condo
I bought a DVD player today. As I was buying it, I said to myself, when the eff are you going to have time to watch anything?
I am also chronically late with everything I do. I annoy myself. So I am trying to do less so I can accomplish more.
And I still need some sort of exercise habit. The walking thing has yet to really manifest. My cardio skills in the meantime are ridiculously poor. So my goal for September is to do yoga everyday. At least 15 minutes/10 asanas.
The notion of cutting down my schedule is a hard one to swallow. I know it will be better for me to have real downtime for myself, to breathe, to do yoga, to have my sacred space. But like last Friday?
Technically, it ended Thursday night at 2am when I crashed on my brother's couch, woke up when his kids got up at 6:40 and 7:15, took care of them all day, got my laundry done, met my parents and sister and her family for dinner, went to see a client and then [redacted]. All necessary things, nothing I could possibly cut.
I guess we'll see how things pop up in the future. Maybe I'll limit myself as to how many activities I do each day off? I guess we'll see.
So when I tell you in the future that I really can't go to the movies because I need to wash my hair, I won't be blowing you off. :P
Okay, it's about 2, I've got to go to bed. I hope this all makes sense of some sort.
It is infuriating that he failed, both in that he's okay with treating me like this and that I tried so much. All the same, I wish things had turned out differently, which is as annoying as it is true.
Admittedly, I do know that there are some qualities that make me love people a little more than I would otherwise. Things like:
x Being more than 3" taller than me (because I've been 5'11 since I was 12, feeling short is rare for me)
o Being from Texas, East/Central Texas, Dallas/Houston/San Antonio/Austin. Because ATX = ♥
ox Alternatively, being from the same county that I grew up. Because we're a rare find.
x Being left-handed (because we are rare and awesome)
o Having ADHD/an entrepreneurial mindset (because it's hard to keep up with the speed of my thoughts)
x Being really, really intelligent (because I'm a wicked smart nerd and I love people who are smarter than I am)
o Having skills that I envy, which can be any number of things as my desire to do things is wide and varied
x Not being content to be idle (because I will never be content with someone who will spend days watching DVDs and TV shows while merely sitting still)
o Chivalry makes me drool, I will admit it (and no, you cannot revoke my feminist card. :P)
x Mad kissing skills (because it's one of my two favorite things to do)
xo Idle kisses on my nose/forehead/top of my head (because I am not only a siren)
o Extensive travel/expatriot experience (because I love stories about other places)
Yeah, I'm not sure where this was going, it's been a long day. So let's move on to something else.
So I have this wonky work schedule. I work long days 3-4 days/week. Which means I don't normally see anyone during my work week (if I do, it's either short or it fucks up my sleep/ability to get to work on time the next day), so the 3-4 days off I have each week, this is what I do with them:
-- attempt to catch up on sleep
-- unADHD my house for the week
-- household chores
-- laundry
-- see my family
-- see my friends, specifically my two bffs but really could be anyone of my acquaintance within reasonable driving distance
-- date
-- forward progress on various on-going website/online class/marketing/yarn projects
-- unpack boxes/do projects on my condo
I bought a DVD player today. As I was buying it, I said to myself, when the eff are you going to have time to watch anything?
I am also chronically late with everything I do. I annoy myself. So I am trying to do less so I can accomplish more.
And I still need some sort of exercise habit. The walking thing has yet to really manifest. My cardio skills in the meantime are ridiculously poor. So my goal for September is to do yoga everyday. At least 15 minutes/10 asanas.
The notion of cutting down my schedule is a hard one to swallow. I know it will be better for me to have real downtime for myself, to breathe, to do yoga, to have my sacred space. But like last Friday?
Technically, it ended Thursday night at 2am when I crashed on my brother's couch, woke up when his kids got up at 6:40 and 7:15, took care of them all day, got my laundry done, met my parents and sister and her family for dinner, went to see a client and then [redacted]. All necessary things, nothing I could possibly cut.
I guess we'll see how things pop up in the future. Maybe I'll limit myself as to how many activities I do each day off? I guess we'll see.
So when I tell you in the future that I really can't go to the movies because I need to wash my hair, I won't be blowing you off. :P
Okay, it's about 2, I've got to go to bed. I hope this all makes sense of some sort.