Hello, 33!
So I'm 20 days late writing this post. It's been a really busy ... several months, honestly. Mostly good things.
For instance, I just returned from a trip to Chicago where I learned an entirely new massage modality. That was awesome in many, many ways.
I've been looking back at my year, my resolutions, my previous birthday goals ... it's amazing what keeps popping up and remains undone.
What I just need to admit to myself is that I have no driving inner need anymore to spin poi. I could bemoan open spins, or the class' move from Takoma to Silver Spring, or the lack of new tricks to master, but honestly, it comes down to my hands. As full body as poi can be, it's unquestionably a lot of hand and wrist movements that I cannot allow myself to do.
To be perfectly honest, unless this new modality becomes my sole practice focus, I will also be surrendering my hooks, needles and yarn after I finish the blankets-for-my-minis project. I am losing function in my hand, regardless of stretching, supplements and keeping idle.
So. Happier note:
What's really turned my world sideways is the house, which relates to my last birthday post's list items 1 and 4. I have no credit card debt, and a mortgage. And this condo that just got curtains hung today and will finish being painted tomorrow (save the hallway). Things are not unpacked, bookshelves have not been bought yet (keep waiting on craigslist to come up with the perfect opportunity!), items are not in the places where they will ultimately live. My pantry is currently home to cleaning/maintenance/paint supplies.
The Chicago trip also pertains to item 12, which was to travel. I haven't been to Chicago before, though I technically never was in Chicago, it was all suburbs. ::shrugs:: Reason to go back.
Where I failed:
2. I did schedule an annual exam. It's on 8/4. I'll be asking about adrenal and thyroid levels in addition to the usual testing requests.
3. Skipped the retirement account to have more money for closing.
5. I didn't get anything out of Texas. No time, no funds for that yet. Also, I haven't managed to talk to my Texas ex yet about what remains. It's been several years, I'm sure things have gotten tossed/adopted into his household.
Dietary/health things (no dairy/more veggies/take supplements/kill insomnia/get a trainer): The lack of dairy is easy. I can't eat blocks of cheese anymore. The others are going to happen shortly. It's partly unpacking, partly I need to figure out eating with my work schedule, partly needing funds for the trainer.
And here's where the ADHD kicked in and demanded to know the concise version. So I give you the prayer from my Lomi Lomi class' final session closing. We were to share aloud a prayer for our own selves. Mine was split, unsurprisingly:
1. Make time for sacred space.
2. Let my inner athlete out.
Yep, instead of a long list of goals, it's just two. I need to work on my intuition, standing in my power, being a priestess. And oh, let me tell you how upset with me, my inner athlete is. If you look at how many years I've been running on the list of things to do, you may be able to guess how upset she is with me. So yeah, definitely got to make the body happy. The best part of doing more things with my body is that the more active I am, the healthier I automatically become in my eating. Positive feedback loop. ;)
Actually, I will put here that I do want to drop 20 pounds. That's what I have to show for the last year where I pretty much stopped exercising consistently, and started eating more and more junk food. Most of it came about in the last six months, which is why I am having the thyroid checked. I don't normally bitch about weight but I really loved where my body was last year so while having fuller lush curves is not a bad thing, I miss the strength and [there doesn't seem to be a word in my head to describe how much I prefer to occupy less space] that I had then. In a perfect world, I'd lose much more than 20, but really, 20 would make me really effing happy.
Real plans to make these things work out will come along soon enough. For now, I'm going to bed.
Peace, love, joy.
For instance, I just returned from a trip to Chicago where I learned an entirely new massage modality. That was awesome in many, many ways.
I've been looking back at my year, my resolutions, my previous birthday goals ... it's amazing what keeps popping up and remains undone.
What I just need to admit to myself is that I have no driving inner need anymore to spin poi. I could bemoan open spins, or the class' move from Takoma to Silver Spring, or the lack of new tricks to master, but honestly, it comes down to my hands. As full body as poi can be, it's unquestionably a lot of hand and wrist movements that I cannot allow myself to do.
To be perfectly honest, unless this new modality becomes my sole practice focus, I will also be surrendering my hooks, needles and yarn after I finish the blankets-for-my-minis project. I am losing function in my hand, regardless of stretching, supplements and keeping idle.
So. Happier note:
What's really turned my world sideways is the house, which relates to my last birthday post's list items 1 and 4. I have no credit card debt, and a mortgage. And this condo that just got curtains hung today and will finish being painted tomorrow (save the hallway). Things are not unpacked, bookshelves have not been bought yet (keep waiting on craigslist to come up with the perfect opportunity!), items are not in the places where they will ultimately live. My pantry is currently home to cleaning/maintenance/paint supplies.
The Chicago trip also pertains to item 12, which was to travel. I haven't been to Chicago before, though I technically never was in Chicago, it was all suburbs. ::shrugs:: Reason to go back.
Where I failed:
2. I did schedule an annual exam. It's on 8/4. I'll be asking about adrenal and thyroid levels in addition to the usual testing requests.
3. Skipped the retirement account to have more money for closing.
5. I didn't get anything out of Texas. No time, no funds for that yet. Also, I haven't managed to talk to my Texas ex yet about what remains. It's been several years, I'm sure things have gotten tossed/adopted into his household.
Dietary/health things (no dairy/more veggies/take supplements/kill insomnia/get a trainer): The lack of dairy is easy. I can't eat blocks of cheese anymore. The others are going to happen shortly. It's partly unpacking, partly I need to figure out eating with my work schedule, partly needing funds for the trainer.
And here's where the ADHD kicked in and demanded to know the concise version. So I give you the prayer from my Lomi Lomi class' final session closing. We were to share aloud a prayer for our own selves. Mine was split, unsurprisingly:
1. Make time for sacred space.
2. Let my inner athlete out.
Yep, instead of a long list of goals, it's just two. I need to work on my intuition, standing in my power, being a priestess. And oh, let me tell you how upset with me, my inner athlete is. If you look at how many years I've been running on the list of things to do, you may be able to guess how upset she is with me. So yeah, definitely got to make the body happy. The best part of doing more things with my body is that the more active I am, the healthier I automatically become in my eating. Positive feedback loop. ;)
Actually, I will put here that I do want to drop 20 pounds. That's what I have to show for the last year where I pretty much stopped exercising consistently, and started eating more and more junk food. Most of it came about in the last six months, which is why I am having the thyroid checked. I don't normally bitch about weight but I really loved where my body was last year so while having fuller lush curves is not a bad thing, I miss the strength and [there doesn't seem to be a word in my head to describe how much I prefer to occupy less space] that I had then. In a perfect world, I'd lose much more than 20, but really, 20 would make me really effing happy.
Real plans to make these things work out will come along soon enough. For now, I'm going to bed.
Peace, love, joy.