health issues, size acceptance, and contentment with our bodies as women
I was participating in a conversation about size acceptance, prejudice, and living with ourselves. It was about body image, the food we eat, shape, size, and health, and the discussions were interesting at first
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Comments 48
My mother has been overweight all my life, but I didn't notice really because she was my mom, and you're used to someone looking a certain way and you don't really question it until it's pointed out to you. And she's actually gained weight over the years. By some miracle, she doesn't have high blood pressure or diabetes, but she's over 50, and who's to say she definitely at risk for them.
So, whenever I bring home food that's like, a bacon cheeseburger or something relatively unhealthy, I just have to fix my face and ignore her when ( ... )
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we eat too much and don't burn it off, we gain weight.
I think this happens with a lot of people - I see it in myself, too. I'm lucky in that I live a lifestyle that lends itself towards exercise and eating healthy. I have the choices which other people don't - fresh vegies, an easy-access gym, and once my metabolism gets re-started, it burns very well and I see results in a month or so.
Others aren't so fortunate.
There are several layers to the Fat issue - one is health, one is size acceptance.
Yes, many people need to lose weight for health reasons. The problem is that, for a lot of othem, the weightloss is also mixed up in the negative beauty messages we're told: you're not skinny enough, young enough, pale enough, primped enough, perfect enough - you're not a real woman unless you can look like sex onna stick ( ... )
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My mom did something similar. If you're not used to exercising, no matter what your weight is, you need to take it easy. You can't just jump into a hardcore exercise regime expecting to see results faster or something. And then the injury puts you back because you have to wait until you've healed to exercise again.
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Ok I'm rambling with out saying anything but that's me in a nutshell.
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See, where I am right now isn't where I want to be. But I know that I can get to where I want to be with a little effort and an exercise routine.
Many of the women I've been reading don't know that they can do that - as in, they think in the head, "yeah, I might be able to exercise, eat healthy, lose weight" but they've never experienced it - their body doesn't know they can, and so it's harder for them than it is for me.
*hugs* I know what you mean with the difference between "you must weigh this amount to be acceptable" and "I don't like what my body looks like". There's a fine line between health and vanity and 'acceptable' body shape - where does the desire to look good end and the desire to feel good about yourself begin?
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My problem is motivation. I will get started on a health plan (workout, exercise, etc) but after a time I get frustrated that things aren't moving along fast enough. I get discouraged and hence begin to eat poorly because I figure "what the hell".
Ok so far I've spilled my guts out to you more than my therapist so here's a couple of dead presidents for you.
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Before I hit my recent sick bout, I was really into the flow of the health plan I'd sorted out. And it felt good - although exercise habits can be somewhat addictive.
Spilling guts is fine, Lis. Always glad to hear from you! :)
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I've been meaning to post about a couple of the articles amilyn linked to last week, and the comment discussions associated with them. They point up what an elusive thing moderation really is in US culture at least -- not only do people not know how to do things in moderation, there's widespread difficulty grasping what it even is. One blogger said flat-out that nobody had yet been able to demonstrate to her any discernible difference between "eating in moderation" and "being on a diet," and several commenters agreed with her ( ... )
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That epidemic disconnect blows my mind.
To a degree, it does mine, too. My mother had a saying, "Elegant sufficiency, not elephant sufficiency." And I use it now to describe when I'm comfortably full, not stuffed.
Do you have the time to find the links Amy posted last week? I'd love to read the articles.
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http://harrietbrown.blogspot.com/2009/05/they-dont-even-know-theyre-doing-it.html
I'll need to hunt to find the one with the other comments I mentioned -- I think maybe it was a secondary link.
I do want to do a full post about it; just not sure when it'll happen. Next week at the earliest.
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That's just...extremist. Frankly, it's Health Terrorism.
Yes, you watch what you eat and don't indulge all the time, because your body can't take it. Your digestion can't process it fast enough, your metabolism goes apeshit at how much stuff you've given it (as well as the kind of stuff it's being given) - and yes, there is an element of limitation to it!
However 'restraint' does not have to equal 'denial'.
*sigh* The point the poster was making was a good one - the language of that article was problematic in so many ways. The comments...well, I'm stuck between being horrified and wanting to hit something very hard.
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When I'm eating well, it's hard for me to eat healthily instead of trying to STOP eating altogether
Oh, I know the feeling of sitting down to a feast and wanting to try everything! My mother's cooking is dangerous that way.
The health vs. fat issue is a tricky one to navigate, though - especially when one's body refuses to get with the plan, as it does for so many people. I'm lucky, as I mentioned to someone upthread, because my body does react well to exercise and dietary changes. I know it can be done for me - others, like you, don't have that experience and that knowledge. And so the motivational aspect is harder.
I want to discuss this more with you, hon, but I can't because I have to head out for work. But I always value your input - you've got thinky thoughts about stuff. *hugs*
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I have a couple of friends who were reed slim in their adolescent/young adult years while their mothers were large women. One of them said to me, once, that she used to be her daughter's size until she had children. By that time, she was probably at least 200-250 pounds.
I know that I've found it harder to keep from 'letting myself go' now that I've turned 30, and yes, it's daunting.
Does it have to be overwhelming energy that you put in? Is there no way to reduce the amount of effort it takes to maintain a diet? I don't mean to decry your previous attempts, but you've already spoken of your propensity to make it 'all or nothing' - is it possible that you're doing the same here?
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Now, I could go into all sorts of cliched sayings (i.e. "I prefer to be happy"), but I'm not gonna. Gimme the burger. I need the iron anyway.
/soapbox
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It's difficult 'cos there's several layers here: there's attractiveness, there's social integration, there's self-image, and finally, there's health. And 'big' pings the buttons on each of these issues generally, but doesn't necessarily have to ping the buttons on all of them for the individual.
I'm not sure that made sense, but I just got home from work and my brain is fried, so I'm going to let it stand.
I'm glad you feel good about yourself, though. It's a good thing to be okay with your body type. *hugs*
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Ahhhh. I gotcha. See, I know my health could be better, but hell, so could everybody's. I see what you mean. And no worries. My brain ceased working last week. *hugs back*
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And, yeah, my health could be better, but...it comes and goes. I was just hitting peak condition...when I got sick, my hockey took a hiatus for three weeks, and my body required more food to keep everything going.
So now I'm just getting back into it, and it's hard. I'm all achey from the gym this afternoon!
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