Bliss?
I am sitting in the house that will soon be half mine. The house, and the cars and everything in it. That's weird. I've never been with anyone before that actually has things to share with me. And he actually wants to share these things with me. All my life I longed for the fairy tale. I dreamed of this. When I was in relationships I hated those cheesy romantic movies because I didn't have that. And now I do. Now I have my fairy tale. I don't have to wait, I don't have to live on the fact that this guy has "potential". He's past that point. He's already there, everything I wanted, and nothing that I didn't want, all rolled up into one human being. Not that he's perfect, not that I am either, I don't want perfect, but it's the imperfections that I cherish the most. It's in the imperfections that I find beauty. I can sit here, in bliss and still sit with my pain, and know that everything is going to be okay, and even if it's not okay, that is OKAY. I am going to be someone's wife. I am going to be a wife. His wife. And I have never wanted anything more. I have never understood why, why get married, it's just a piece of paper, right? But now I understand, I want it. More than the party, with the pretty white dress and all of the flowers and presents, I want the life, the marriage, the union, whatever. I just want it. All of it. I want to clean the house and make dinner and do the laundry and rub his back after work and let the dog out and be responsible and pay bills and fall asleep watching T.V. and all of those things I once thought were so mundane and boring and cliche. Now I understand. Now I am there.