Some stuff that's been on my mind.
I've been sitting at home by myself a lot. Just simmering. I don't have very many friends that I hang out with or want to hang out with, so I need some sort of outlet for the shit that I've been thinking lately. This will probably be fragmented. I'm not posting this to anyone, so I really don't need any comments, it's just for my own reference.
Firstly, I'm sick of hearing about Nicholas Sparks. I don't care about his books or his movies. I really just don't give a fuck. If I was interested, I'd take the time to read one of his books.
I'm sick of everything being a pissing contest with everyone I know. If I complain about a pain in my ass, your pain is worse. I've had a long day, your day was longer. You walk fifteen miles to work, uphill both ways. Stop it. It doesn't impress me. By discussing my problems with you, I'm looking for a closed mouth and open ears, not someone to one-up me with their bullshit. I don't talk to anyone anymore because you all do it. Incessantly.
If your significant other is really that bad, then do us all a favor and leave them or shut the fuck up. If you've been bitching about how crazy, mean, rude, disgusting, fat, grotesque they are for more than a few weeks, you're obviously either A) a pussy, or B) a manipulative douche bag who is using them for whatever it is they do for you (sex, money, drugs, etc.). Don't complain to me about how terrible your boyfriend/girlfriend is when all you do is spend 23 and a half hours a day with them.
Most of the people I know have found out that I'll do just about anything for them. Most of the people I know have also taken this as a green light to use me and abuse me for whatever they can get out of me. I know what you're doing. I'm not an idiot. You're not manipulating me, you're just giving me a reason to turn the tables when I feel the opportunity is present. I am a calculating son of a bitch.
Stop asking me "are you alright?" Constantly. Unless I am on fire, or bleeding from every hole in my face, then I am fine. The problems I have aren't going to be solved by any simpleton asshole that I know. If I look angry, it's probably because I am. Don't bother trying to comfort me.
I know when you are guilt tripping me. A lot of you like to do this. Especially when you know I have money, you conniving fucks. Again, I wasn't born yesterday. Rick has cash, let me make him feel guilty so he'll buy me shit. Rick has pain medicine, let me make him feel guilty so he'll share the wealth. Don't have gas? Maybe Rick can give you a ride. Hungry? Let's go to Rick's. He always shares his dinner.
I ask for absolutely nothing from you people. I try my absolute hardest to be the best friend that I can be. If I do need something, I try to return the favor, tenfold.
"Hey, mind buying me a beer? I have the cash, I just need you to grab it for me." "Eh, well. I guess I can." (continue hemming and hawing until Rick says fuck it and gives up)
Computers don't just stop working. If you have a virus, trojan, or some other malady going on with your computer, it's not likely that someone is sitting outside of your house in an unmarked van sending encrypted, infected files through your phone lines. It is likely, however, that you got it from watching midget gang-bang bukkake incest snuff films via limewire. Don't bullshit me. I know enough about computers and enough about shitty liars to know when a computer isn't connecting to the internet or is getting a BSOD because of something user-related.
Hey, you're lonely. You know what? I understand. I get lonely, too. We all get a little bit lonely, sometiiiiimes. The fact of the matter is, however, that your boyfriend left your apartment an hour ago. You've spent six out of the past seven days with him, and now you're calling me so I can convince him to come back over to your place. It's not happening. I don't want to hang around with you, and chances are, I don't want to hang around your boyfriend. Leave me alone.
I just don't understand how a lot of you people call me your "friend" but wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire. So, I'll do everyone a favor. Take your friendship, and shove it up your ass.
Firstly, I'm sick of hearing about Nicholas Sparks. I don't care about his books or his movies. I really just don't give a fuck. If I was interested, I'd take the time to read one of his books.
I'm sick of everything being a pissing contest with everyone I know. If I complain about a pain in my ass, your pain is worse. I've had a long day, your day was longer. You walk fifteen miles to work, uphill both ways. Stop it. It doesn't impress me. By discussing my problems with you, I'm looking for a closed mouth and open ears, not someone to one-up me with their bullshit. I don't talk to anyone anymore because you all do it. Incessantly.
If your significant other is really that bad, then do us all a favor and leave them or shut the fuck up. If you've been bitching about how crazy, mean, rude, disgusting, fat, grotesque they are for more than a few weeks, you're obviously either A) a pussy, or B) a manipulative douche bag who is using them for whatever it is they do for you (sex, money, drugs, etc.). Don't complain to me about how terrible your boyfriend/girlfriend is when all you do is spend 23 and a half hours a day with them.
Most of the people I know have found out that I'll do just about anything for them. Most of the people I know have also taken this as a green light to use me and abuse me for whatever they can get out of me. I know what you're doing. I'm not an idiot. You're not manipulating me, you're just giving me a reason to turn the tables when I feel the opportunity is present. I am a calculating son of a bitch.
Stop asking me "are you alright?" Constantly. Unless I am on fire, or bleeding from every hole in my face, then I am fine. The problems I have aren't going to be solved by any simpleton asshole that I know. If I look angry, it's probably because I am. Don't bother trying to comfort me.
I know when you are guilt tripping me. A lot of you like to do this. Especially when you know I have money, you conniving fucks. Again, I wasn't born yesterday. Rick has cash, let me make him feel guilty so he'll buy me shit. Rick has pain medicine, let me make him feel guilty so he'll share the wealth. Don't have gas? Maybe Rick can give you a ride. Hungry? Let's go to Rick's. He always shares his dinner.
I ask for absolutely nothing from you people. I try my absolute hardest to be the best friend that I can be. If I do need something, I try to return the favor, tenfold.
"Hey, mind buying me a beer? I have the cash, I just need you to grab it for me." "Eh, well. I guess I can." (continue hemming and hawing until Rick says fuck it and gives up)
Computers don't just stop working. If you have a virus, trojan, or some other malady going on with your computer, it's not likely that someone is sitting outside of your house in an unmarked van sending encrypted, infected files through your phone lines. It is likely, however, that you got it from watching midget gang-bang bukkake incest snuff films via limewire. Don't bullshit me. I know enough about computers and enough about shitty liars to know when a computer isn't connecting to the internet or is getting a BSOD because of something user-related.
Hey, you're lonely. You know what? I understand. I get lonely, too. We all get a little bit lonely, sometiiiiimes. The fact of the matter is, however, that your boyfriend left your apartment an hour ago. You've spent six out of the past seven days with him, and now you're calling me so I can convince him to come back over to your place. It's not happening. I don't want to hang around with you, and chances are, I don't want to hang around your boyfriend. Leave me alone.
I just don't understand how a lot of you people call me your "friend" but wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire. So, I'll do everyone a favor. Take your friendship, and shove it up your ass.